


Never

by KhaneRose



Category: Peter Pan & Related Fandoms
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M, Neverland, Original Characters - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:27:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 20
Words: 76,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28263897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KhaneRose/pseuds/KhaneRose
Summary: A young woman struggling to hold on finds herself falling into a world that should not exist. magic is real and the darkness is more tempting than ever. Will this world change her or will she change it?
Kudos: 4





	1. Prologue- Grace

Grace walked, as she always did, with confidence. The damp soil beneath her bare feet, storm raging above the treetops, no time to stop and look for shelter. The forest whispered tales about events happening across the seas, secret words hidden in the wind brushing through the branches, unwelcome distractions. Lantern raised, piercing through the darkness, Grace continued on. She move purposefully towards her destination, unhindered by any thorns or branches that might come her way. The dangers usually found lurking in the shadows avoided her, hiding from her presence. On this night, the forest was her domain. Grace had work to do and nothing would hinder her. She could feel it in the atmosphere before arriving at her destination, something was coming, change was in the air.   
In a clearing stood a circle of seven stone obelisks. Grace called it the meeting place, she had been there many times before. As she stepped into the circle, a ball of light floated from the trees. Like always, it had been waiting for her, and like always it spoke to her. The light could speak in many ways, to Grace it spoke with a wordless silence, letting her feel its meanings deep within her being. It danced around, saying what it had to say, only occasionally interrupted by Grace and her questions. It was clear that she was not happy with what had happened.  
“You have to save him.” She said, at last, “No. I know he won’t like it, he’ll just have to put up with it.” Grace peered into the light, “There’s no use in arguing, what’s done is done. All we can do is prepare and hope they make good choices. Now go. I have work to do.” The orb of light danced off through the trees, floating off towards its destination, leaving Grace alone in the stone circle once more.  
Grace was not well liked, most people avoided her. They called her ‘witch’. Grace had been called many things over her lifetime, ‘witch’, ‘slave’, ‘bitch’, ‘whore’, they all meant the same thing in the end- “You are not welcome.” So Grace lived alone in the middle of the forest in a home she built with her own two hands. She had a small patch of land for crops, a barn for some animals, and plenty of space for her to work in. Grace’s work centred around all that was mystical in the world, she could bend nature to her will, summon storms when the ground was dry, bring life to that which was on the brink of death, protect those in danger. She worked with all manner of beings, the animals she raised, the people who dare approach her, the spirits of the land, the faefolk, and things that some would go as far to call demons. Her work was dangerous, it always had been. Grace placed her lantern on the ground and knelt beside it, from her apron pocket she pulled a knife. The blade was no more than an inch long, more than enough to fulfil its task. A small cut across her palm, a hand placed against the ground. Grace screamed as the world took what it needed. The spirits called out across borders, the storm grew furious. Winds that could knock a grown man to his feet surrounded her, yet Grace did not move. The howling around her increased until she could hardly bare it any longer. And then it stopped. No rain, no winds, just a calm breeze telling Grace that it was time for her to leave.


	2. Birthday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is only when you fall that you learn whether you can fly

Summer. It was the same every year. Hot and sticky, for days at a time, broken up with sudden and unpredictable rains. To much of the world Thirty-One degrees Celsius would be considered mild, and pleasant. But in the small, English town by the sea it was unusually warm. Middle-aged men sat out on the beach, shirts off, whilst their wives rolled up their trouser legs to chase small children down in the waves. It was the sort of day that you would hear people say “I wouldn’t mind the heat, it’s the humidity that gets you.” Over and over, as if simply saying it would make the humidity disappear. The seaside town was usually quiet, but days like this brought people out of the city in droves. The beach that was so often completely empty aside from a dog walker or two, now lay covered in a sheet of pasty bodies absorbing the sunlight and fantasising about how ‘brown’ they would be when they returned to work the coming Monday. A small van was pulled up at the edge of the beach, right where it met pavement, a small crowd of frustrated people had gathered around.  
“There’s no ice cream left.” A woman said, leaning out of the van window, “I’m sorry.”  
Her apology fell on deaf ears. The heat had an awful way of bringing out the worst in some people. They were sweaty, and uncomfortable. They didn’t spend half an hour waiting around just to be told ‘no’.  
“Nah, I ain’t havin’ it.” An angry father announced, “Ya got a bloody shop full up there.” He pointed at the nearby pavilion that stood out in the water. The woman in the van blinked slowly and took a deep breath, readying her ‘customer service’ voice.  
“Sir, the shop and pavilion are currently being set up for a private function that’s happening later.” She told him with a faked sympathetic smile. She had no sympathy for the angry man at all. Didn’t he realise that she too was hot and uncomfortable? If she had had things her way she never would have taken the van out at all that day, there was too much to do at the cafe on the pavilion. As far as she was concerned, the sooner this birthday party was done with everyone would be better off. Mr. Kelly, the pavilion property manager, had announced a month ago that there would be a birthday party hosted at the property and it would be up to the cafe workers to do most of the work involved in setting the party up. Every one of the low paid workers would groan internally when the birthday girl came by with plans and demands. At least once a week, Lucy Smith would come in accompanied by her father and step-mother. It was often hard for the cafe staff to believe that this woman was really turning Twenty-Five, Lucy had been prone to what could only be called tantrums when things weren’t going to plan, often leaving the staff with a lot to gossip about after she left.  
“She actually stamped her feet!” A young waitress had whispered to her supervisor after Lucy’s last visit. The most recent tantrum had been over food, she had changed her mind yet again and no longer wanted the BBQ cookout she had previously planned, and was now asking for a Sushi buffet. When she had been told that it was just too late to change the catering, Lucy crossed her arms, suppressed an annoyed shout and stamped her foot. She exited the cafe in a huff, leaving her father behind to arrange the alcohol.  
“You know what it’s like, girls.” He said with a chuckle, “Everything’s got to be perfect for your big day, makes you women go crazy.”  
“Yeah…” One waitress replied with a false giggle. The whole cafe breathed a sigh of relief when he finally left to go after his daughter. Later on the staff all agreed that they would never work with this family again. They just had to get the party out of the way. Once the party was done, they could go back to normal. It was just rotten luck that the day of the party had to be one of the warmest days of the summer so far. Mr. Kelly had come by in the morning, interrupting the gradual set-up to insist on taking two of the ice cream vans out to the beach. He wouldn’t lose all of the day’s revenue to the cafe being closed. The staff had argued that they needed all hands on deck, but he refused to listen, he needed the sales more than they needed the day to go smoothly. This left the cafe supervisor, Kathy, to call in one of the part-time girls to help her with the party whilst the other two full time workers went out to sell ice cream. Kathy was counting down the hours until the day was over, constantly reminding herself that it wasn’t too long in the grand scheme of things. A few more hours and all the drama would be over. She struggled to attach the string of pink and white lights to the high posts around the pavilion, whilst the teenage part-time worker sat at a laptop arranging the night’s music playlists. Kathy had tried to make the program work many times that day, but she had never been much of what she called a ‘tech person’, she only even had a mobile phone because her grown children had bought her one for her birthday. Loud electronic music suddenly started playing over the sound system, Kathy startled and turned around, almost pulling down the string of lights that she had just secured.  
“It’s working!” her young co-worker announced, before pushing a button to turn the music off and setting the laptop down on a table. Kathy stuck her thumbs up and called the young girl over to help with the next set of decorations. Balloons in various pastel colours, all filled with glitter that Kathy was sure would end up covering the pavilion floor. At least these arrived already inflated. By the time they were done, the pavilion did look lovely. The pastel colours, glitters, and fairy lights looked almost magical reflected against the sea below. Kathy hoped that her work would be appreciated.  
The sun hadn’t even started to set when Lucy and her family arrived, the guests weren’t due to arrive for another two hours. Lucy stood in the centre of the pavilion, looking around and judging the decor.  
“I suppose it will be better when everyone is here, and my presents are over there.” She pointed at an empty table. Lucy remained stood whilst her family brought the remaining decorations over, occasionally giving directions to where she wanted things to be, she always had to have big birthday parties, and she always had to have them just so. She would call her birthday parties almost perfect, if it wasn’t for one thing. Lucy had a step-sister who was six months older than herself. Not that anyone could guess. From the outside it appeared that the Smith family was small with a perfect daughter. Lucy’s father, Si, and step-mother, Alison, never failed to sing her praises. Lucy was pretty, Lucy had so many friends, Lucy had a decent job, Lucy had a boyfriend. It was fine that she had no plans to move out because Lucy was such a joy to have at home. If you were to ask Si and Alison about their other daughter, Faith, the most they would say was that she ‘tries’ but it’s so hard “you know, with her illness.” They would add. Faith had started to get sick when she was just Twelve years old, she had spent more of her life sick than healthy. That was just about as much as someone could get Alison or Si to say about her health. They didn’t like to talk about it, they didn’t like to talk about Faith much at all. Faith and Lucy had never got on well, they were opposites in almost every way, and when Faith had started to get sick it had got so much worse. At least, no matter how bad things got, Faith could always count on her grandmother.  
Bubbe Moskowitz was an old Orthodox Jewish woman, and despite being very small she could be very fierce, scary even. It had been her ferocity that ensured she stayed a part of Faith’s life. Her son, Faith’s father, had died when Faith was only six months old. His death had hit the family like a ton of bricks, and for a while Alison had grown very close to her Mother-In-Law. That ended when she met Si, he didn’t think that their closeness was appropriate, but Bine Moskowitz was not about to let him keep her separated from her only granddaughter. Bubbe Moskowitz did not like Si, and she had no issue saying so. Faith always found it amusing when her grandmother would rant about Si, Bubbe Moskowitz always said the things that Faith was too afraid to. She wished that her Bubbe could be with her at the party, but the fierce old woman never travelled on a Saturday.  
The night wore on, getting louder and more joyful by the hour. It was clear, that despite her faults, Lucy was so loved. She stood in the arms of her boyfriend, laughing with her friends. The champagne flowed freely, repetitive dance music played in the background. A faint beeping came from Faith’s pocket, an alarm on her phone, a reminder to take her medication. Faith sighed and dug around in one of the large pockets of the jacket she was wearing for a small plastic container. Five pills, she swallowed them dry. It was because of these that she couldn’t join in the drinking, not that she would have otherwise. She learnt her lesson about drinking at Lucy’s parties the hard way- five years ago when her step-sister’s boyfriend had decided to spike her drink. Faith never quite believed that Lucy had no idea what was happening, but their parents decided that Lucy was innocent. Lucy had done what she always did, crocodile tears and the insistence that she didn’t know what she did was so wrong, it was just a joke, she didn’t mean it. Whether that was true or not didn’t matter, it always got her out of trouble. This had been Faith’s life ever since Si and Lucy had moved in, she was used to it. As long as she stayed out of the way, under the radar then everything would be fine. So she stayed where she was. Sat at the back of the pavilion, next to the gate that would be opened on particularly warm and busy days so that visitors may jump straight into the waters below. Faith was content watching the light’s reflection dancing across the rolling tide, waiting for the party to be over. She had sent a text to her grandmother looking forward to visiting her in a few days, and turned her gaze to the sky. The night was surprisingly clear, stars that were not usually visible shone brightly over the gathering. It was the sort of night that could make you feel like maybe magic could be real after all.   
The music stopped abruptly, every party guest turned to face the centre of the pavilion where Lucy stood smiling. A huge cake was being wheeled towards her and everyone began singing ‘Happy Birthday’. Lucy cut the cake, still smiling. She never got around to eating that first slice though, as that was the time that people started approaching her with hugs and congratulations. In that moment, everything changed for Faith. A single moment, small as it might have been, had been enough. The snowflake that caused the avalanche, the raindrop that caused the flood. Lucy’s smile, the tears in Alison’s eyes, the love and affection, the sudden realisation that Faith had never experienced that. The calmness and contentment that had been delivered by the sea and stars had dissipated. All that was left was a vast emptiness and the smallest slither of hope that felt more like desperation. Faith only ever prayed when she was with her grandmother, but now she had nowhere else to turn to. She was so alone, she had been so alone for a long time now, and she didn’t want to be any more. Head bowed, and eyes closed, Faith prayed silently to any being that would listen. Her prayer was a simple one.  
“Please, I don’t want to do this anymore.”  
The summer air whipped past Faith, carrying with it the last remnants of the day’s humidity, the music was playing once more, and Faith was still unseen. She opened her eyes slowly, and made a reckless decision. She was done being ‘good’ and trying to go under the radar to avoid Lucy’s pettiness. Faith was going to have a drink, consequences be damned. The pharmacist had warned her that drinking alcohol whilst on her medications could land her in the hospital, or worse. Faith did not care. She opened the bottle of vodka and drank deeply from it. The last thing she would remember of the party would be the drinks fiery warmth slipping uncomfortably down her throat as the world around her faded away.


	3. Helpless

Faith opened her eyes, one type of darkness seeped into another like a grey and stormy afternoon transitioning into a calm night. Her head was pounding, her limbs ached, something was not right but she couldn’t pinpoint what it was. Faith closed her eyes tightly, taking a few deep breaths, desperate to ease her discomfort. Cool air passed over her, taking away the remnants of the day's oppressive heat. It was that quiet rustling of leaves as the breeze passed over them that helped Faith start to piece together everything that was wrong with her situation. If she was still at the party she would never have been able to hear the sound of leaves over the music and chatter. If she was still at the party, there would be no trees close by, if she were still at the party then the texture beneath her would be hard and wooden. It was then that Faith realised that she was sat on sand. She opened her eyes once more, and everything snapped into place. It was night time, she was on a beach, her shoes were gone and, judging by the blurriness of her vision, so were her contact lenses. Faith swore quietly, wondering where she was and how she got there. She assumed that it must have been one of Lucy’s pranks, what else could it possibly be? In that moment, Faith was furious with herself, how could she have been so stupid? She knew it was a bad idea to drink, but she had done so anyway. She had put herself in a vulnerable position and was now paying for it. She reached into her inside pocket, looking for her phone, she was going to have to call her mother and tell her what happened. Faith checked each pocket one by one, but her phone was not there. In fact, the only belongings left with her was a small Polaroid camera and a few boxes of film. No phone, no way to know where exactly she was, no way to call for help, even her pill box was missing. The only thing Faith could think to do was stay put and wait for someone to come find her, whenever that could be.  
It wasn’t all bad, or at the very least, it could be worse. If Faith had to stay put all night, at least the weather was fair. There were worse days and worse places than this to be stuck for hours. Besides, she reminded herself, she had wanted to get away from the party. Here she was, away from the party- just like she had wanted. Quiet at last. It had been so long since Faith had had the time to just sit by the water and relax, it had been a long time since she was just able to let go without having to worry about what her mother would think or whatever drama would be stirred up by her step-family, finally she could breathe. The more that Faith thought about it, despite not knowing where she was or how she got there, the whole situation was nice in it’s own way. Lucy would be enjoying herself, feeling very clever and funny. She would be expecting Faith to be worried, scared, or angry. Her friends would be giggling about the ‘prank’ perhaps waiting for Faith to drag herself back to the pavilion. They never would have counted on her enjoying the cool darkness on the beach. To Lucy and her friends, there was nothing worse than being alone with little else than their thoughts. Faith closed her eyes, ready to lay back and enjoy the still quiet that surrounded her when the silence was broken.  
A sharp crack, the sound of twigs breaking as someone stepped over them. A quiet sound, that had the night not been so still Faith would never have heard it. Whipping her head around, she peered into the darkness towards the tree line hoping to see who or what was there. But it was no good, it was too dark and the trees too thick to make anything out.  
“Hello.” Faith called out, “Is anyone there?”  
No reply. Just silence occasionally broken by the sound of the tide falling over rocks and creeping along the sand. Faith shook her head, convinced that she had simply imagined the sound of movement by the trees.But no matter how hard she tried to relax again, Faith couldn't shake the feeling of being watched.  
"Fuck." She sighed, and turned back to face the trees, "You can come out now, Lucy. Had a good laugh? Taking my phone? And my shoes? I mean what the fuck were you even hoping would happen?"  
Faith waited for a response, for someone to step out from the darkness and reveal themselves, but no one came. The tide continued to wash in and out, and the wind continued to blow gently, as if Faith had said nothing at all.   
"For fucks sake." She shouted, she knew someone was there, just watching her, she knew it. Were they enjoying this?  
The sound was quiet at first, almost imperceptible, an almost childlike giggle that grew into a booming collection of laughs, coming from the trees. Just as suddenly as it had started, the laughter ended and there was quiet once more. Faith was infuriated, ready to launch into an angry tirade when someone spoke out.  
"We are not Lucy. We are not her friends." The voice was calm, measured, light, and to Faith it sounded like it was coming from the very air surrounding her.   
"Who the fuck are you, then?" Faith spat out, "what have you done to me?"  
"You are lost. You must be found."  
This made no sense to Faith, the whole situation was just strange. Every time the voice spoke, it sounded different.  
"Wait…" Faith started, "am I dead? Is this like Heaven? Or…"  
"No. You are lost."  
Lost? Lost? What on earth could that mean? Clearly she was lost. Faith didn’t know where she was, and she was sure that not many people did. Wasn’t that the very definition of being ‘lost’? Yet somehow, when the voice said the word, and told Faith that she was lost, it sounded like it had a different meaning.  
"Well, how do I become un-lost?" Faith asked with an annoyed sigh  
"You walk."  
"What? No. How? I-"  
"You will walk."  
Those were the last words that the voice spoke to her, and with their final statement a gust of wind so strong came by that it lifted Faith to her feet. Faith couldn't explain this feeling, it was like the wind was surrounding her, getting closer and closer, supporting her tired limbs and wiping away any pain she had. She took a deep breath, and tentatively put one foot in front of the other. What happened next was stranger still, when Faith took her next step, the whole world seemed to change, to the naked eye it looked the same, but Faith could feel it deep within her bones. Something had changed. She walked on, not knowing where she was headed, bare feet pressing into the sand. She had so many questions, but had no one to answer them. She hoped that it was all just an elaborate prank, a bad dream, a hallucination, the thought that the situation was anything other than fake terrified her.   
So Faith kept walking, trying not to think, trying to ignore everything outside of putting one foot in front of the other. With no way to tell the time, Faith felt like she had been walking for hours, the landscape didn't change much. Trees to one side of her, the shoreline at the other. In front of her laid the expanse of sand, occasionally interrupted by a rock or two, there was no sign of human involvement at all. No boats, no buoys, no worn down wooden structures. Just the beach. Just as Faith thought that this beach may really be infinitely empty, something changed. Far off in the distance she could make out the faint glow of light. She breathed a sigh of relief, telling herself that it had to be the party, or at least part of the seaside town that she lived in. Faith felt stupid for even considering that the beach could be anything strange or unusual, of course it had to have all been a prank.  
Faith sped up a little, hoping to see the pavilion come into view. It never did. Instead, as she walked on what came into view was an immense boulder, from a distance it looked like a collection of rocks that could have made up the edges of a rock pool, but as Faith approached it became clear that the large silhouette was a single mass. It was out of place on the otherwise bare beach, and the closer Faith got to it, the stranger it looked. Bumps and ridges that lacked the sharpness that one would expect from a rock or boulder. Faith reached out and placed her hand on top, it felt just as strange as it looked. Leathery and damp, she quickly tore her hand away. When Faith looked down at her fingers, she saw it was covered in blood. This was no rock, it was some kind of animal. Faith backed away so quickly that she tripped over her own feet and fell down. She scrambled, panicking, in the sand. Unable to tell if this thing was alive or dead, it had definitely been hurt. She knew that from the blood.  
Heart pounding, and breathing heavily, Faith was more afraid than she had been all night. Every time she thought that her situation was as bad as it could be, things got worse. She tried, once more, to convince herself that none of this was real. But it was no good, her mind wouldn't accept the 'what if's' and 'could be's'. Everything felt too real, too solid to be anything but. Faith didn't know what to do, it was all too much, her head was spinning, she couldn't focus, she wanted to go home, she wanted to scream.  
"Miss?" A kind voice said from behind her. It was then that Faith looked up and saw her shadow cast upon the sand. She turned around to see an old woman standing there, holding a lantern.  
"Oh." Faith said, quietly, "I'm sorry, I'm-" she had assumed she was in the way, but the old woman cut her off.  
"Sorry? Whatever for?"  
"I'm in the way, aren't I?"  
"In the way of what? This thing?" The old woman kicked the beast and shone her lantern over it, "Nah, I just come out t' see if it was true. Crocodile 's finally dead."  
Faith stood up, and moved closer to the animal, trying to get a good look.  
"That's a crocodile? But it's...huge."  
"That's a crocodile." The old woman confirmed, "been a plague around these parts for years, shame that it killed- never mind that, though. You must be freezing out here all on your own, come with me, I own an inn not far from here."  
The old woman put her arm around Faith's shoulders, shocking her with how strong she was. Faith knew she would have a tough time breaking free of her grip if she wanted to.  
Walking off with a strange woman in an even stranger place was not the cleverest of ideas, but Faith didn't feel like she had a choice. If she went with the old woman, at least she might find out where she was. They walked together at a slow pace, the dim, orange light from the candle lit lantern illuminating the ground ahead. Faith had so many questions that she wanted to ask, but never did. She felt far too confused, and exhausted to speak. If the sky above had not still been pitch black, she would have assumed that it had been many hours since she opened her eyes on the beach. Her body felt like she had been awake all night, like it was expecting the dim light of sunrise to appear at the horizon at any second, the sky above told a different story. The position of the moon said that it was not much later than midnight, it had hardly shifted at all since Faith had woken. She couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong with that. Suddenly the sand beneath Faith's feet turned to a narrow cobbled path, in front of her stood an old town.  
The town was strange looking, a collage of buildings from different era's all clumsily stuck down in one scene. There were Victorian looking shop fronts, black and white buildings of the Tudor period, and the inn where the old woman stopped. The outside was unassuming, made of dark wood, a few candle lit lanterns lit up the front doorway. When she removed her bony hand from Faith's shoulders, she pushed the door open and revealed something that looked like it came straight out of a tavern in Nassau or some other Carribean island when piracy ruled those parts. There was a long bar, and plenty of men sat around drinking.  
"Well don't stand there all night, come on in." The old woman said, snapping Faith out of her thoughts. Faith nodded and stepped inside, although she wouldn't have said it was warm, the inn was certainly warmer than it was outside. She was led through the bar space quickly, to avoid unwanted attention, and up a flight of stairs. The old lady took a key from a pocket deep within her dress and unlocked a door.  
"Room Five. It ain't the biggest, but it will do until you know what you're doing with yourself." She said, Faith gave her a confused look, "don't look at me like that, you're not the first girl to be found all alone on that beach, you lot never know if you're coming or going, so we'll get some food in you, bit of drink, bit of rest, and in the morning… well, we'll see."  
"I… uh… thank you… miss." Faith said, unsure if it was the right thing to say, the woman just waved her hand, indicating that Faith should go inside the room. Inside there was a bed, a set of drawers and a bedside table with a candle on top. Faith sat on the bed, it wasn't comfortable but it would have to do. The old woman lit the candle and turned to Faith.  
"Eli will be up in a bit with some food and drink for you, nothing special, mind, just some bread and butter, bit of whiskey too if you're lucky. I expect you to keep the room clean and tidy, not that it looks like you have many belongings to mess the place up with." The woman sighed, "stay out of trouble, keep to yourself, if you need anything you ask for me- Ethel."  
Faith nodded. Ethel left the room, leaving Faith alone. She laid back on the bed, her bed. It was hers for now, anyway. She turned her head to the open window to her side, the view was picturesque. A calm night, a quiet town, she could just about see the sea from where she lay. There was something about the sea moving in and out from shore that Faith had always found calming. It was one of her favourite things about the town where her family lived, she could almost always hear the sea. Often Faith would take herself off to the library, to sit by a window with a book. The sounds of the sea always made it so easy for her to get lost in the stories completely. Lucy always said she was boring, that she spent too much time reading. Si always agreed. He agreed with Lucy no matter what. It was Si insisting that Faith read too much and that she should go out more that led Faith to find the library in the first place. It was further away than she was usually comfortable going alone, her illness didn't often let her go far, but its location by the sea made the journey worth it. If Faith closed her eyes tight, she could almost believe that she was back in the library. Almost. The sounds from the bar below brought her back to reality. A small, dim, room, lit only by a candle. A town that made no sense. A night that felt like it would never end. Faith had lost all hope of this being one of Lucy’s pranks. As far as Lucy would go to humiliate her stepsister, this was out of her reach.  
"What the hell is this place?" Faith muttered to herself, looking out of the window and over the town. She could see small spots of lights, candles on the windowsills of other buildings. She imagined they were like night lights left behind for scared children. Faith found it odd that candles were so prevalent, come to think of it, she hadn't seen any type of electricity at all in the town, nor in the building she was in.   
"Maybe these people are like the Amish or something…" Faith wondered, she thought it made sense, nothing she had seen looked modern at all, and the few people she had laid eyes on all appeared to be quite comfortable without electricity and the other conveniences that Faith was accustomed to.  
There was a loud knock, and the door was pushed open before Faith could invite her visitor in. Eli was a huge man, with a shiny, bald head and a sneering mouth. He was carrying a wooden tray in one hand.  
"Bread and water." He said, putting the plate down on top of the drawers.  
"Thank you." Faith muttered, taken aback by the man's aggressive mannerisms. Eli grunted in reply, then turned to face the door. He locked it with a loud click.  
"Ethel found you, then?" He asked, emphasising the word 'found' in a way that sent a chill up Faith's spine.  
"I guess."  
"You know what that means?"  
Faith shook her head, she had no idea what it meant, but the look on Eli's face and the tone of his voice told her it was nothing good.   
"Maybe it's easier if you don't know just yet." Eli sighed, "that's not my problem though, just be good and don't make a scene."  
Faith wondered if doing as Eli said was part of 'keeping her head down' like Ethel had told her to do, but she wasn't sure. She was about to ask what Eli meant, and why he had locked the door, but then she understood. He had reached down to a button at his waist.  
"What? No. No no." Faith started to panic, Eli groaned, he was not in the mood for a struggle. Ethel never did tell the new girls that the inn was also a brothel, she never made it clear that her kindness came with a steep price attached.  
"Fuck it." Eli spat out, "You're here now, one of Ethel's girls, you work or you get out. That's just how it is."  
Faith froze, she wanted to get up and leave, but she was too afraid. Eli took her silence for compliance and came down upon her. The smell of his alcohol tainted breath against her cheek was sickening, Faith closed her eyes and tried to pull away, but Eli just pulled her back again. She knew what was about to happen, it seemed inevitable. She could try to fight, but Eli was so much bigger and stronger, what chance would she have against a man like that? Faith took a deep breath and opened her eyes, looking straight into Eli's face.  
"Get the fuck off of me." Faith had no idea where she had summoned such bravery from.  
"What was that?" Eli said with a smirk.  
"Get off!" Faith screamed the words loud enough for the heavens to hear, and as she did power surrounded her. She knew then that miracles did happen. She had hardly moved, yet Eli had been thrust across the room landing against the set of drawers and causing it to splinter apart. Faith started to panic, Eli wasn't moving, he was just slumped against the wall and covered in splinters. She edged closer to the man afraid of what might come next. He was bleeding, a jagged splinter protruding from his cheek. He hadn't hurt her yet, but Faith was sure that if Eli were to come to with her still in the room with him, then she would be in a far worse position than he was in now. Her head was spinning, she had to get out of this room, she had to do something. Faith stood still for a moment, trying to summon all of her bravery, then she made her move. Hand shaking, she reached into the waistcoat pocket. As she did, Eli stirred. Faith's heart stopped briefly, she almost wanted to give up then, she was too afraid to go on. But suddenly instinct took over, Eli's eyes snapped open and his hand shot to Faith's wrist, grabbing it tightly. Faith moved faster than she ever had, slamming her free hand onto the large splinter sticking out of Eli's face, driving it ever deeper. Eli screamed in agony and let go of her hand. Faith grabbed the key and rushed to the door, knowing she had only seconds to unlock it and free herself. It was a close call, she jiggled the key in the lock once, then twice, on the third try it twisted and Faith was able to pull the door open just as Eli had stood up. Quick thinking, and even quicker movement had her slam the door on him and lock it from the outside. There was no time to breathe, she had to move, get out of the building, find somewhere to hide. Faith crept down the dark hallway, constantly reminded of the predator who would certainly try to hunt her down by the shouts coming from the room she had just left. Luckily the bar below had become rowdy, no one there could hear their missing companion. Faith had reached the bottom of the stairs before anyone noticed her, she had just stepped onto the bar floor when Ethel turned around, clearly shocked to see her.  
"What on earth are you doing?" She asked Faith. Faith did not answer. Ethel's brows furrowed, and her eyes narrowed suspiciously, "where's Eli?" She asked.   
"I don't know." Faith lied, "He never came to me, so I thought I would.. come find you."  
Ethel sighed and muttered something about 'useless bloody men' and stormed upstairs, presumably to tell Eli off. Faith took the opportunity to make her way to the door, slipping between the tables, trying not to draw more attention to herself. It took less than a minute, but the pounding of her heart made it feel like traversing the bar had taken hours.  
The cool night's air fell over Faith's face, she had made it outside, but the ordeal was not yet over with. She had to get far away from the 'inn', but she didn't know where to go. The beach was flat and wide open, anyone looking for her would find her right away there, she could maybe find another building, a house, knock on the door and beg whoever opens it for help, but she didn't think that she could trust anyone here. It was the soft blowing of the wind that gave Faith her answer, leaves rustled, and she knew that she could hide amongst the trees. Faith ran clumsily through the town towards the treeline, not stopping to look behind her at all. If she was being watched or followed, she didn't want to know. Aside from a thin path created by the footsteps of hundreds of people who walked through the forest, the foliage grew densely. Faith knew it would be unwise to stray far from this path, but she also knew that staying close meant there was a greater chance of being found. She ran parallel to the path until the leaves above had become so thick that she could no longer make it out. She didn't dare stop moving though, not even when her legs began to ache in a way she could hardly remember having felt before, not even when her head felt light and her stomach turned. What eventually made her stop was an orange glow and the sound of footsteps. Faith pressed herself against the trunk of an old tree, standing as quietly as she could.  
"Come on Eli." A man said, "She could be anywhere by now, this forest is huge."  
"Nah, she has no fuckin idea where she's going. I'll find her alright." Eli growled  
"Christ! It ain't worth it! You know he has camps in these parts, do you really want to risk crossing paths with that damn monster?"  
"He's dead, you prat. You afraid his ghost is gonna come and… do whatever the fuck it is ghosts do?" Eli laughed at his friend, and Faith took the opportunity to take a peek past the tree trunk. In the dim torchlight Eli looked so much more frightening than he had earlier, the sharp wooden splinter had been torn from his face, leaving behind a huge and bloody gash. Faith knew that it must be painful, yet Eli was talking and acting like it was nothing. Something about that made her so much more afraid than she had been.  
"What if he's not?" Eli's friend said, looking around, nervously.  
"There's no way anyone could have survived a fight with that crocodile. The bastard is dead."  
"You're sure about that?"  
"Yes, I'm fuckin' sure. Now let's go find that bitch, alright?" Eli stormed off, his friend in tow. Faith waited until she could no longer see it hear them before creeping away in the opposite direction.   
Faith ran until she could run no further, then she walked, dragging her feet, deeper and deeper into the forest. It was exhausting, Faith felt like she would collapse at any moment. She had been moving for so long, yet it was still dark, impossibly so. The sun should have started to rise by now. Faith stumbled over a rock, catching herself against a tree just before she hit the ground. It was at that strange, low angle that she was able to see a slither of light coming from behind a thick and overgrown bush. At first she thought it was Eli, but she couldn't hear any sound of life nearby. There was only silence and the crackling of flames.   
Faith held her breath, heart racing, she pushed the leaves aside. There was no turning back now. Uneasy footsteps over the cold ground, going forwards, always forwards towards the flames. They were still obscured, providing the area with a dim glow. The campfire had been placed at the mouth of a small cave. From where she stood, Faith could see a pile of blankets and a wooden chest. Someone had made a camp here on purpose, but they weren’t around. Faith kept edging forwards towards the light, towards the warmth, it was only then that she realised just how tired she was. She would sit by the fire, rest a little while, and hope that whoever had set up the camp was friendly. She just didn’t have the energy to keep moving. The cave floor, although damp, was far more comfortable than just about anything that Faith had felt that night. The warmth from the untended fire was soothing, calming her soul. She felt oddly safe where she sat. The longer she sat, the safer she began to feel. Safe enough to really look at her surroundings, instead of staring out of the cave, scared that Eli may show up once more.  
“Fuck.” Faith sighed, trying to shake off everything that the night had piled on top of her so far. As relaxed as she currently felt, Faith just could not shake the feeling of everything being very wrong. She thought that maybe she was just hungry and dehydrated, that would at the very least explain the fuzzy and spinning sensation in her head. She could see several bottles of unidentifiable liquid poking out of the chest. She didn’t want to steal, she wasn’t that kind of person. But Faith’s mouth was so dry and her head just would not stop spinning. She gripped the bottle tightly and tore out the cork. When pressed to her lips, Faith had expected the bottle to produce some sort of alcohol, instead her tongue was met with the bitter taste of very stale water. It did not bother Faith, she kept drinking, she would not have stopped if it wasn’t for the sinister growl that came from the caves edge.  
“Thief!” The owner of the camp had returned. When Faith turned to look at him, she thought she had seen the devil. Tall, broad, imposing. Torn clothes, covered in blood, fury etched onto his face. In the dim campfire light he seemed to be engulfed in hellfire, even his eyes appeared to shine a blood red hue. It took him only two strides to be upon Faith. He had been holding the carcasses of two rabbits he had hunted, but had thrown them aside and gripped her wrist. In one harsh movement he pulled Faith to her feet, then slammed her against the cave wall. He stared into her face, bent over and lips pulled back into a sneer. His whole expression contorted grossly by the unsightly scar running down the side of his face. Faith started to shake. “Do you know what I usually do with thieves?” The man asked, his tone deathly calm, the hints of an accent hidden at the edges of his precise and proper English pronunciation. Faith shook her head. She wasn’t brave enough to speak. The man smirked. “I cut off their hand.”  
Faith wanted to scream, she wanted to run, instead all she could do was let out a small protest.  
“No. Please.” Her pathetic statement was met with a mirthless laugh that sent shivers down her spine. Whoever this man was, he terrified Faith. She was more afraid right then than she had been of Eli.  
“You make such a convincing argument.” He said, voice thick with false sincerity, “but I’ve made up my mind.” Faith started to cry, legs shaking, if it wasn’t for the strong hand around her wrist keeping her in place she would have collapsed to the ground right then. The man gave a frustrated sigh before speaking once more. “It’s not so bad, I manage just fine.”  
Cold metal brushed against Faith’s cheek before being presented in front of her eyes. An evil looking iron hook that replaced the man’s right hand. The man smiled sadistically, and pulled Faith towards the fire.  
“Let’s take a look at that hand then, shall we?” he teased. Faith was still sobbing uncontrollably. All she wanted was for this night to be over. Her captor had just been about to let go of her hand, and let her fear be a lesson against stealing. As evil as he looked, as evil as he could be, he did not enjoy such cruelty. He had already seen enough violence that day, and did not really wish to see much more, much less be the cause of it. He would have explained himself, if it were not for the slither of silver-ish skin he saw on Faith’s palm, illuminated by the fire. A small ‘x’ shaped scar, something that Faith barely noticed herself.  
“Where did you get this scar?” the man asked her, frantic, but Faith was still shaking and didn’t answer. “Tell me and you keep your hand.” Faith looked up at him, confused.  
“I don’t know.” She said, “I’ve always had it.” Her hand was dropped instantly and the man began pacing the cave. Faith wanted to ask what the problem was and why he was so interested in her scar, but she was still so afraid and the words wouldn’t come. She just watched, helplessly.  
“Can you walk?” The uncomfortable silence in the cave broke as the man crouched before Faith.  
“I think so.” She told him, although she wasn't sure at all. She was still so tired and her legs still ached, but she was afraid of what might happen if she had told him that.  
“Good. You’ll be coming with me.”  
“Where?” Faith asked, but she got no answer. The man reached into the chest and pulled an old length of rope from it. Faith did not fight as he bound her wrists, using his teeth to secure the knots. She didn’t fight as he pulled on the rope, dragging her to her feet. Faith was simply beyond caring, feeling like she would be lucky to escape this night with her life intact.  
Back into the forest, back into the cold and dark. Everything felt so much worse now. Thin and wiry branches slapped Faith in her face, thorns and stones stuck into the soles of her feet. Burning in her thighs and calves from a journey that felt like it would never end. Worst of all was the utter confusion about her situation, her captor had remained silent, leading her through the forest with seemingly no direction. Occasionally he would stop to kick a rock out of his way or shake leaves from his hair, sometimes he would be forced to stop because Faith had stumbled over something in the dark. This was always met with annoyance and a sharp tug at the rope. Each tug enraged Faith, none moreso than the one that came after she tripped over a large and sharp rock that tore through her leggings and cut the skin beneath.  
“Fuck.” She said in barely more than a whisper, but it felt like a shout. Her captor stopped and turned on his heel, looking down at her.  
“I’d watch my language if I were you, miss-” he tried to warn her but Faith was too angry to care anymore. All of her hurt and frustration had begun to pour out from her along with the blood that came down her leg.  
“Oh fuck off!” She told him, “I’ll say what I fucking want, I'll have you know that ‘fuck’ is the perfect fucking word for my current fucking situation, and I’m not your fucking miss!”  
“Your situation? You stole from me.”  
“This isn’t about you.” Faith spat out the last word, as if the man’s very existence was an affront to the entire universe.  
“Then pray tell, what is it about?”  
Faith got uneasily to her feet and looked her captor dead in the eyes. Then she started to speak, barely stopping to breathe between words, getting faster and faster.  
“Well for one we can start with I don’t know where the fuck I actually am. I just got drunk and woke up on some beach somewhere, but it couldn’t be a normal beach could it? No! There’s some fuck off huge dead monster crocodile bullshit there. And then just when I think I’ve found someone who might help… she didn't actually want to fucking help me, she just wanted to fucking sell my body… And there was this man, he tried to… he wanted to… tried to… he almost did. Fuck. He was huge, terrifying, but I got away somehow. I ran through the forest, kept going no matter how bad I felt. I thought I was gonna pass out, fuck, but then I find a cave, it’s warm and there’s water. Guess I should have known there would be another asshole stopping by there too, to ruin my day even more.” Faith paused briefly, taking a deep breath and trying not to start crying again, “Who the fuck are you anyway? All dressed up like a pirate like it’s Halloween or some shit…” The man took a small step back, his stance softened ever so slightly.   
“All things considered, perhaps I should forgive you, hm?” He started, “and perhaps, as a show of good will, I can give answers to some of your queries.” Faith remained silent, looking at the man. He sighed, frustrated, and continued talking. “I am Captain James Hook.” He took a deep and almost theatrical bow, “and you are standing on the largest and most central island of Neverland.”  
“You’re shitting me.” Faith said, “That’s not real, it’s just not.”  
“I can assure you that this is all as real as you are.”  
“Fuck.”  
Faith looked like she was about to collapse, the night’s stresses finally taking its toll on her, Hook closed the gap between them in one large stride and reached out with his left hand to steady her. Contrary to what people thought, he was not an uncaring man. The moment Faith had started to unleash her pain, Hook had started to feel guilt over his actions and although she hadn’t specified what that man had tried to do to her- Hook had an idea. He knew the cruelty of some of the townsfolk better than most people. Hook placed his hand firmly at Faith’s waist and began to guide her through the forest.  
“We shouldn’t linger here. This part of the forest isn’t always safe.” He said, softly. Faith did not fight against him, she was too tired, but she did ask a question.  
“Where are we going?”  
“To see an old friend.”  
The answer did not explain much at all, but Faith accepted it, it was at least more satisfactory than not knowing at all.


	4. The Witch

It was still dark when they arrived at a small cabin in a clearing, the stars glimmering brightly against the blackness of the sky, the moon casting a dim blue glow on the surrounding structures. It was obvious to Faith that the cabin and surrounding areas, herb gardens, animal enclosures, had all been painstakingly crafted by hand and likely by no more than a few people, the area just felt special in it's own way, like the love that had been put into the process of building the homestead was alive, and drawing Faith in towards its arms. Hook did not knock at the front door before opening it. He did not even look towards Faith. He was tired, and he wanted some answers.  
“In.” He commanded. Faith obeyed.  
The cabin was lit by a series of candles, all of which were almost burnt out, yet despite the gloomy lighting the cabin retained a homely and kind feel, just being within its walls made Faith feel safer.  
“You should sit.” Hook muttered, gesturing vaguely at a bench, he almost sounded concerned for Faith's comfort. The wood was hard, and unsanded but the fine splinters were multitudes softer on Faith’s legs than anything she had experienced that night. Faith stretched her still bound wrists across the table in front of her and put her head down. Finally she could rest for a bit.  
“Grace!” Hook called “Grace! Get out here! We have an issue-”  
He was interrupted by a door opening. Illuminated by a single bright candle, stood a tall and beautiful woman with skin dark as the night sky above, she even seemed to glisten like starlight. She smiled.  
“James, such a pleasure to have your company.”  
Grace said this in a way that Faith could not make out if she were being sincere or sarcastic. Faith couldn’t think of any situation where Hook’s company would be a pleasure.  
“You’re late.” Grace added, kindly.  
“Late?” Hook was incredulous  
“Very late. Had you acted as my messengers advised you to, you would have been here hours ago and avoided all sorts of conflict.”  
Hearing that made Hook angry, but it was never hard to anger the pirate, his temperament was infamous across the island.  
“I had just freed myself from the jaws of the blasted crocodile, I killed the damned thing, but of course I should have just stayed on the beach, dehydrated and exhausted, next to the rotting carcass because it’s what ‘the island wanted’, or so your ghostly friends told me. I thought you knew me better.” He leaned his back against the wall behind him, arms folded across his chest. Grace remained unbothered by his anger, she knew that it would fade away just as quickly as it bubbled to the surface.  
“And I thought you were an intelligent man.” She scolded him, “Instead of waiting, you travelled miles through the forest for some stale bread and damp blankets. In the meantime a young woman was left to suffer.” Grace spoke to Hook sternly, trying to convey just how different things could have been.  
“Oh, so your grand plan was that I collect her from the beach? Protect her from the horrors of this land? I'm not exactly a knight in shining armour.”  
“Only you could have brought her here in one piece. At least you found her in the end."  
Hook rolled his eyes, Grace had the very annoying habit of knowing him. It seemed sometimes she'd even know him, and what he'd do, better than he knew himself.  
"So what now?" Hook asked, impatient.  
"You want me to check if it’s real, don’t you?" Grace replied, but she did not wait for an answer. Grace sat herself next to Faith and carefully undid the clumsy knots in the rope around her wrists. “That better?” She asked. Faith nodded and Grace smiled at her. Grace's smile reminded Faith of her grandmother’s, kind, gentle, and knowing. “What’s your name, darlin’” Grace asked.  
“Faith.”  
“Such a lovely name.” Grace said, “I need to see your scar. Is that okay?”  
Faith nodded tentatively, she wanted to ask why her scar was so interesting, but Grace, although kind, had a strong presence. A presence that made Faith unwilling to speak when the mysterious woman was so clearly contemplating something. Grace held Faith's hand in her own and traced the scar with her fingertip. Just as Grace's finger reached the middle of the cross, she felt a shock like a small jolt of lightning. She had been startled, but didn't want to show it. Instead she released Faith's hand and turned to Hook.  
"Well?" He prompted  
"It's the same." Grace told him, Hook gave an annoyed sigh, "and it is not." Grace continued, standing up and moving across the room. She waved a hand over one of the mounted candles, lighting it, then proceeded to do the same to each of the remaining candles around the room. She did this to maintain the quiet, to buy herself some time to think, to anticipate the questions she may be asked and to plan her answers. She knew it would not be long before her old friend lost his patience, like he so often did.  
"What does that mean?" Hook asked, breaking the silence, just as Grace knew he would.  
"It means," Grace started to say before lighting the final candle, "That A’whae has played its next hand."  
"Don't give me those riddles, woman! Speak plainly." Hook demanded. Grace raised her hand, signalling him to be quiet, then returned to Faith.  
"What do you think it means?" Grace asked, "It is your scar after all."  
"It's just a scar." Faith told her with a shrug.  
"It could be just that. Just a scar." Grace agreed, "but do you have any idea what makes it so interesting?" She looked at Faith, waiting for a reply, but Faith couldn't think of anything about her scar that could be so interesting so she just shook her head. Grace continued in the same calm and compassionate tones, "it just so happens that our friend, James, once had a scar just like yours. The same shape, the same size, the same placement. It was the same."  
"And?" Faith said, not understanding her situation at all. Yes, it was odd that two people could have a scar exactly the same, but it could also be a coincidence. Faith hoped that it was just a coincidence.  
"Sometimes here, some people, special people, are marked. They have a role to play, a destiny to fulfil. They are chosen, connected to this place in a way that few others are-"  
"Don't make it sound so noble." Hook interrupted, "this so called 'destiny' has been nothing but a curse thus far."  
"A curse?" Faith choked out, suddenly very afraid again. Grace nodded, sadly.  
"It is an unfortunate story, that James received his mark through a curse. His mark came from someone who didn’t know what they were doing, yours comes from A’Whae itself."   
“A’Whae?” Faith asked “Who-”  
“She means ‘Neverland.’” Hook said with a sneer, “according to Grace, Neverland is alive, it has a name, wants, needs. Horse shit, if you ask me.”  
“I didn’t ask you.” Grace told him, lips pursed.  
“You never do. Not shy with your demands, though, are you-”  
"James." Grace's warning tone cut Hook off mid rant, "I know you have had a very bad day, but I will not tolerate this rudeness much longer."  
"Fine, fine." Hook rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, "so, what now? What am I meant to do?"  
"Faith will go back to your ship with you. When it returns, of course."  
"No."   
"It is the only way."  
"I won't take her."  
Grace stood up from where she had been sitting and crossed the room. She pulled a small dagger from her apron pocket. For a moment Faith thought that she might stab the pirate.  
"Then kill her. Make that your destiny." Grace put the dagger into Hook's hand as he glared down at her. He approached Faith, her fear so thick and strong that he could almost feel it himself. He held the dagger to her neck, pressing it against her skin. Just as a few tiny droplets of blood appeared against the blade, he dropped the dagger into her lap and closed his eyes tight.  
"I am not a murderer." He insisted, saying it aloud for his own benefit as much as Faith's. Hook bowed his head and took a few deep breaths. "I'm sorry. Forgive me. Please, forgive me." He turned his back to Faith, he knew she would not reply, knew that she was too afraid to speak once more. She had known him only a few hours and already seen some of the worst parts of him. He had almost gone through with it, almost slit an innocent woman's throat, all because he was afraid. Hook had thought he had seen all that Neverland could throw at him already. He had bared the burdens of it unlike no other man had. He alone had been cursed. But now there was another, he didn't know what it meant, she had not received her scar through trauma or battle. She had perhaps been born this way, born to take on such a burden. Grace would have called it greatness and power, but Hook called it suffering and evil. Whatever it was, he did not consider it natural. Hook had been afraid the moment he saw the scar, like he had seen an ill omen fortelling certain doom. Like Faith could be the evil that would make the course of his life turn further into the darkness. However, he also had pity for the woman. It wasn't fair, he thought, that a woman so helpless be forcibly placed into such a role. It was his pity that brought him so close to taking her life. He knew that he would have chosen death over this curse, it would have been a kindness, he would have freed her from this burden. But he couldn't do it. He had only been the cause of one innocent life to be lost before, he had sworn then that it would not happen again. As a man of his word, he therefore could not kill Faith.  
"Then it is settled, she will go with you." Grace announced.  
"But-"  
"No, James. There is no 'but'."  
"My crew." He said, "they are good pirates, but they are not all good men, she wouldn't be safe."  
"She will be protected." Grace insisted.  
"What? How?"  
"She will be protected." She repeated, more forcefully this time, "I will make sure of it, and you will help me." Grace dug into her apron pocket once more, this time retrieving a small, rolled up piece of paper that she handed to Hook. "It's a shopping list, go fetch what I need."  
"I'm not- no. Fine. I'll go." The pirate turned around to exit the cabin, just as he did Grace called out to him one last time.  
"And James, get yourself cleaned up whilst you're out. I do not want that filth being tracked back into my home."  
Hook grunted in reply, and slammed the door shut behind him.   
Faith let out a sigh of relief. Being around Hook made her feel so nervous.  
"Has he always been, you know-" she started to ask.  
"A little rough around the edges?" Grace prompted.  
"I was going to say a raging asshole, but that works too." Faith replied with a nervous giggle, Grace on the other hand burst into laughter. Her laugh, much like the light, filled the whole room.  
"James is a dear friend of mine, and I would never speak so ill of him. But no, he has not always been this way."  
"What changed him, then?"  
"Time. Time can hurt just as easily as it can heal. In his heart he remains a good man. You do not have to be afraid of him."  
"I don't think I could ever not be afraid of him, not after what he almost did to me. He wanted to cut off my hand." Faith said quietly. Grace scowled, as much as she cared for the pirate, he often infuriated her. She knew he was much better than how he often acted.  
"I do not think he would have gone through with it. He takes no pleasure in harming innocents."  
Faith shrugged, she was tired and didn't feel confident enough to argue. Grace smiled kindly.  
"You need sleep." She said, "come, I have a chemise that should just about fit you, you can take my bed for the night."  
Faith muttered a few words of thanks and followed Grace to the small bedroom, it was as she changed that she noticed something strange. The cut on her shin was no longer there. Her leggings were still torn, and blood remained on her leg, but there was no cut. All that remained was a thin, and smooth ridge of scarring. As Faith looked at her leg, she realised something, something she should have noticed before. She could see clearly. Her contact lenses were gone, but she could make out the ridges of this new scar perfectly, even in the dim light.  
"Grace!" She called out in a panic, "Grace!"  
Grace came rushing in, candle in hand.  
"What is it?"  
"Neverland, A’Whae, this place, can it...can it heal people?" Faith asked.  
"It's rare, mighty rare, but it happens. One time I saw a man. He was old, and frail, but he became young again right before my very eyes. Miracles happen here if you let them."   
Faith sat herself on the edge of the bed, head spinning, it was so much to take in. Then she spoke once more.  
"When I get back home, whenever that is, will I stay… you know… healed?"  
"I cannot say." Grace answered honestly. Faith's next questions came into her mind all at once, questions that had been in her mind, but hidden away, questions that she hadn't really considered at all until now.  
"How do I get back home? Can I even get back?"  
Grace sat next to her and put a warm arm around Faith's shoulders. These questions were always the hardest to answer.  
"Getting back is different for everyone. I cannot say what could take you back, I cannot even say if it is possible at all. It is not for James. But who is to say that you will even want to leave should the opportunity one day present itself?"  
Faith didn't have a response to that. How could she ever want to stay? She was, after all, being forced into piracy. As much as she was unhappy with her life, as much as she had prayed for change, this seemed to take it all entirely too far. Her thoughts raced through her mind in a way that often left her sleepless, yet something about the calm in Grace's cabin lulled Faith into her dreamland quickly.  
Faith awoke to the confusion that so often accompanies waking up in a bed that is not your own. She missed her bed, she missed the blankets that had been knitted by her grandmother, and she missed her cat at the end of her bed. She missed the familiar smells and textures. She even missed the sound of cars passing by her window. The lack of these small comforts left Faith feeling empty, like she only really knew herself in relation to those surroundings that she knew so well. Now she was somewhere else, somewhere without her loving grandmother, the cat she doted on, the comfort of familiarity, she was somewhere without her mother's disappointment, her stepfather's cruelty, and the constant comparison of her stepsister looming above her.   
Faith stretched her arms above her head and took a moment to breathe, to think, to consider what could come next. She did not want to go with Hook, none of Grace's assurances about his inner goodness had changed Faith's mind on that. Every time she thought of the man she saw the image of when he had first grabbed her wrist in the cave. Bloodied, angry, dark, sinister. Had he introduced himself as the devil, as the source of all evil, Faith would have believed it. She still wasn't entirely sure that he was all man, surely there must be some monster in him. She shook her head rapidly, trying not to think, and then trying to think of something rational. She didn't quite believe that the events of the previous night had happened the way that they had. Faith felt stupid for even considering that magic, Neverland, and Captain Hook were all real and that she had encountered all three in the same night. No, she had to have been very drunk, or perhaps even drugged somehow and had just been lucky that she had found a place to stay for the night. She tried to convince herself of that pleasant falsehood, but in her heart Faith knew that she was no longer in the world that she once knew. The lack of pain in her joints, and the clarity of her vision told her that. Even if they had not, there was a certain feeling of clarity in the atmosphere, a feeling that had no words to describe it, a feeling that came from the magic surrounding her, packed so densely around her being that those close by who were experienced in magic and its ways could reach out into the air and caress the power between their fingertips. A soft knock at the door brought Faith from her thoughts.  
"Yes?" She called out, the door opened, Grace stood with a smile on her face and a bowl of porridge in hand.  
"You're going to need this." She said, kindly as ever, "afterwards we have work to be done."  
"Work?"  
"A ritual." Grace clarified, but Faith still didn't understand what she meant.  
"What, like magic?" She asked, taking the bowl and beginning to eat.  
"I suppose you could call it magic. James likes to call what I do 'voodoo', he is wrong. What I do, my work, is much older than that, much more powerful than that. You will see. Eat up."  
Faith ate slowly, savouring each bite. The porridge was warm and had been topped with honey and berries that Grace had harvested herself that morning. Once the bowl was empty, Faith walked tentatively out of the bedroom and into the main room of the cabin. There were candles lit and a mat had been rolled out across the floor. Ritual tools lay nearby. Grace took the bowl from her without saying a word and gestured for Faith to sit on the mat. Incense was lit and the smoke was wafted around.  
"Lay down and expose your thighs." Grace said. She spoke calmly, yet full of authority. Faith obeyed her without even a single questioning thought. There was just something about Grace that made her trust her. Grace began to chant quietly in a language that Faith had never heard before, the smoke from the incense rose in thick pillars, creating spirals and strange patterns in the air. Then came the sharp pain and the tapping noise. Faith knew at once what was happening, this 'ritual' meant that she would be receiving tattoos.   
The whole time she was working, Grace kept chanting, she didn't stop at all, not even for a second, like she was in a trance. Hours passed. Tapping, chanting, and burning pain. Then there was nothing, just silence. Faith could hardly feel her legs.  
"We're done." Grace told her, "you can sit up."  
Faith's head spun as she pushed herself upright, she had never had a tattoo before and the feeling was so alien to her. She had always imagined that the feeling of a tattoo wouldn't be much worse than getting pierced. She had had a lip ring in her youth, and still sported many earrings and a nose ring in adulthood. She knew the sensation of needles passing through flesh, but the pain from this tattoo was unlike any pain she had felt before. She assumed it must have been something to do with the ritual. Her thighs, once milky white and marred by scars were now covered in dark lines, geometric patterns and dots. Seeing the tattoos filled Faith with emotions, something about them felt freeing, something else about them felt like a prison, she felt safe, and unsafe, confused, sad, and oddly alone all at the same time. It was too much, before she could stop herself she started to cry.  
"It's okay." Grace comforted her, kneeling beside Faith on the mat, "you have had quite the shock, awful things have happened to you. But you are not alone. These markings mean that no man can harm you. I promise."  
Faith wiped at her eyes, feeling awkward and weak. She hated crying in front of people, but often found that she couldn't help it.  
"Are you sure?" She asked, choking back more tears.  
"I am certain of it. You are not the first woman I have done this for, you will not be the last." With that, Grace raised her own skirts to show Faith the similar looking lines on her own thighs. "You see, I am like you, you are like me. A’Whae lives within us. You will be fine."  
"Thank you." Faith said, believing Grace's words even if she didn't understand them. took a few deep breaths, calming herself, "what happens now?" She asked, Grace smiled.  
"We wait for James." She replied before jumping up again, "which reminds me, he left you a gift."  
"A gift?" Faith was incredulous.  
"An apology." Grace had picked up a package wrapped in brown paper and tied with string, "clothes." She clarified.  
Faith needed help getting into her new clothes. They were unlike any she had worn before. A shift and stockings followed by a corset like thing that Grace called 'stays', layers of petticoats topped off by a deep red dress. Faith slid on a pair of plain and sensible leather shoes and looked at herself in the mirror, she would have quite liked the outfit had she not felt so restricted. The cut of the garment forced her shoulders back and the stiff stays just didn't feel right. The thing that bothered her the most, though, was not how the clothes felt as she moved but how fine and expensive the fabric seemed to be. The red ensemble was worlds away from the sensible woollen materials that made up Grace's clothes. The crushed velvet and brocades that made up Faith's outfit could not have been cheap. The small amount of lace at her sleeves would have been hours of work alone. She shuddered to think of just how much Hook had spent on her, and was made even more uncomfortable by her awareness of the trouble he must have gone through to get her these clothes so quickly. She didn't understand why Hook would go to so much effort for her.  
"I don't feel like me." Faith admitted, still looking into the mirror, she had always been a jeans and T-shirt girl, she hadn't even put a dress on for her Bat Mitzvah.  
"This is just one of many outfits you will wear, you will get used to it." Grace spoke in such a comforting and reassuring tone that Faith could not help but believe her. In that moment Faith felt like everything might actually be okay. That feeling of calm lasted only that moment, as shortly after Grace had ushered Faith back into the main room to wait for Hook's return.  
"I know you are afraid, James can be horribly frightening at times, but he will not harm you. He will never lie to you or try to trick you, he is honourable in his ways."  
"You sound so sure."  
"We had a long talk whilst you were sleeping-"  
"And?" Faith did not think that Hook's opinion would be changed by a simple conversation.  
"James is stubborn as an ass, he can be awfully resistant to change, but he trusts me and I trust in destiny."  
"Oh." Faith said, “can I ask you one last question?”  
“You just did.” Grace smiled, “but go on, I can see you’ve been troubled by this all day.” Faith looked at the scar on her palm, Grace was right in her assumption, something had been troubling her.  
“If I have this scar, and he had one too.” She paused, unsure if she really wanted an answer to what was so troubling in her mind, “does that mean I’m like connected to him?”  
“I suppose you must be. You are, after all, the only two people to have received a mark quite like it.” Grace spoke cheerfully, as if she hadn’t just dropped several bombshells on Faith’s life. Faith remained silent, she wanted to scream and swear but it wouldn’t come.  
Grace left Faith alone and confused, she had work to be done. Animals to be fed, gardens to tend to. She had offered Faith more food and something to drink, but she had refused. She was too scared, too nervous. Faith thought that if she were to eat or drink a single thing she would throw up. Her head was spinning and her stomach churned as she paced the room. Her mind raced between thoughts, all of her fears playing over and over. A horror film playing in a cinema that she could not escape. Faith wondered if she could just run away. Open the door and run through the forest away from Hook. But that wouldn’t help in the long run, she would just end up alone in a place she didn’t know again. She thought that perhaps being alone could be better than being with the pirate. Both options felt utterly terrifying. Faith’s heart was pounding and felt uncomfortable in her chest, she was so on edge that when the front door opened and light shot into the room, Faith let out a yelp. She turned around, expecting to see Grace popping back in as she had done multiple times that day. Instead, faith’s gaze came upon the man she had hardly stopped thinking about. Captain James Hook.


	5. The Jolly Roger

In the daylight, the now clean Captain Hook appeared far less frightening, he could have almost been a different man entirely. Although he was still tall, broad, and intimidating in stature, he didn't quite look like a man who would resort to cutting off hands so quickly. His appearance was softened by his eyes. Bright blue with a gentle, almost kind quality to them, a world away from the dark and bloodied appearance they had the night before. Hook looked almost as awkward as Faith felt, shifting around with his arms pressed tightly behind his back.  
“Are we ready to leave?” He asked  
“I don’t have much of a choice, do I?” Faith sighed  
“Oh, you do, but I am quite sure that Grace would kill me if I were to leave without you.”  
Faith was unsure, she didn’t want to go with him, but she didn’t want to stay behind either. When she finally spoke again, she felt strange, like there was someone else within her speaking too, making the decision for her.  
“I’ll go with you.” She said. Hook’s eyes widened in shock, he had not been expecting her to agree, he had been mentally preparing to face Grace’s anger, and had been pleasantly surprised. He nodded with a grin and once more led Faith out into the forest.  
Much like Hook, the forest was also much less frightening by daylight. Sunlight broke through the dense treetops in golden rays, illuminating the rich colours all around. The greens and yellows of leaves, flowers of every colour, thriving and healthy in a way that Faith had never before seen. She wanted to stop, to take in everything, to savour every rare sight. But Hook pressed on ahead, his pace unchanging. He had walked this path time and time again, there was no wonder left in the forest for him. There was very little wonder left in any part of the captain's life. He had seen a lot in his time, he often felt like he had seen too much all together. Hook stopped abruptly at a large, fruit bearing tree with low hanging branches and turned around to look at Faith.  
"Are you hungry?" He asked, reaching up and picking a piece of fruit from a branch above his head. He held the deep orange fruit out in his hand, waiting for Faith to grab it. Faith wasn't sure if she could trust Hook, but she took the fruit all the same, raising it to her lips and taking a small bite. It was strange, sweet like brown sugar, but sharp like a mandarin, she enjoyed it immensely.  
"It's good." She said with a smile, a smile that Hook mirrored back at her.  
"We call it the Neverfruit." He explained, "you won't find anything quite like it back home. It makes the most delicious of wines, and can be distilled into the most deadly of poisons."  
Upon hearing the word 'poison' Faith lowered the fruit, unsure if she could eat more.  
"The fruit alone is perfectly safe." Hook said with a mild chuckle, "the process to turn this into a poison is long and arduous. You have nothing to fear."  
From that moment on, Hook slowed his pace, walking at Faith's side. There was something about her quietness that intrigued him. She had said so little the night before, had been so quiet up until the moment she fell and had let everything out. For that brief moment, she had not been afraid of him. When she had been shouting at him, beneath her anger, Hook could see a fire within her. A fire similar to the one roaring within himself. But just as quickly as the fire within Faith had been ignited, it had been extinguished. As they approached town, Hook moved closer to Faith and placed his hand at the small of her back. A small show for any onlookers that she was with him. A warning against anyone who might approach her with dark intentions in mind.  
Despite the daylight, the town still filled Faith with fear, despite her discomfort, despite her mistrust of Hook, she found herself pressing closer to him, he felt safer than anything else surrounding her. The sun sat high in the sky, yet the town still managed to look grey. An ever present and invisible dark cloud hovering over each and every rooftop. Faith had felt that darkness the night before, but it seemed more powerful now, like a storm was about to break. But no one in town seemed to realise it, going on with their days, stopping in shops, chatting, children playing in groups, running around, kicking balls, laughing. Something about the entire scene left Faith feeling uncomfortable. The pair passed through the town unseen by most. Only children stopped to pay attention. Pointing at Hook and whispering with their friends. Faith did not like the attention at all. Hook understood this, he had once avoided the gaze of others, too. He tried to angle his body in a way that would shield Faith from the onlookers, and whilst it did keep her out of the children's sight, it put her straight in the line of vision of another.   
"That's her! That's the bitch!" Eli's furious voice rang across the town square, he bound forward, pushing people out of the way, determined to make Faith pay for what she had done to him. Faith froze in fear, there was no escape this time, nowhere to hide. Then quicker than Eli could grab at her, Hook pushed Faith aside, standing between her and the man who wanted nothing more than to see her suffer.   
"Get the fuck out of my way, old man." Eli snarled  
"I don't think I will." Hook told him with an ice cold manner. Eli laughed.  
"Don't make me fuck you up, too." He warned, still laughing.  
"You won't have to." Hook said, taking a step forward, Eli had just been about to reply with another taunt when Hook's hand reached his throat and closed tightly around it. He pushed Eli back against a wooden post, lifting his feet clean off of the ground.  
"You will not harm her." Hook said, Eli struggled against his grip.  
"But...my face, look what she did to my face." He tried to argue, struggling to get the words out through the choke.  
"I don't care what she did to you, I don't doubt that you deserved it."  
"But-" Eli's protest was cut off by Hook tightening his grip around the man's throat.  
"You will not harm her. Do you understand?"  
Eli nodded frantically, unable to breathe at all, Hook released his grasp and let him fall to the floor. He ushered Faith away, towards the docks.  
"Thank you." Faith said, the words quiet, Hook did not reply, he simply nodded and continued walking. It wasn't that he did not appreciate the thanks, nor was he resentful of having had to go through the trouble. The altercation with Eli had filled the pirate with terrible guilt. He had protected Faith just then, he had done what he had hoped any able man would have done in that situation. Yet last night he had been so callous, so cruel, he didn't need the theatrics or threats to get his point across. He should have been kind from the very start, he should have tried to help her. Instead he had lost sight of himself, he had made her afraid on purpose, he had enjoyed it. James Hook was a pirate, but he also prided himself on being a gentleman, and he had not acted very gentlemanly at all the night before. He felt ashamed and disgusted with how quickly he had become the monster that people thought he could be.  
A single ship was present near the docks, anchored a few miles away. It was bigger and more majestic than any ship that Faith had ever read about or seen. A single black flag remained raised, whilst the remaining sails had been lowered.  
"That's a big fucking boat." Faith said in awe.  
"Ship." Hook corrected her, "and, your new home." He signalled with a loud whistle and raised hand for a longboat to be sent down to collect him. When in port, many of his men preferred to stay in the town, with their wives or in the inn. Some, like Hook, preferred to stay aboard. His ship was the only place in Neverland where Hook felt at home, it was his in every way. No matter how many times he had been separated from it, he always came back. It was at times like this, waiting to take his first steps back on board that Hook remembered his past so clearly. His mother, his father, a friend, school, running away, becoming a pirate. Everything he had lost along the way. James Hook had not always been a pirate, although sometimes he felt that way. He had once been just a young boy ripped from his mother's arms and forced into a boarding school. He had not always had power and people willing to follow him. He had once been an outcast whose only friend was his aunt's house slave. He had not always been so strong willed. He once had dreams of becoming a teacher, but let his father bully him into the family trading business. He had travelled the world, made many friends and even more enemies. He had been one of Blackbeard's most trusted, he had fought alongside Calico Jack and Ann Bonny. He remembered each of these defining moments as he stood at the docks, a protective arm still around Faith. Of every strange and unbelievable thing he had experienced, Faith may have been the strangest. She had been forced upon him by Neverland and he didn't know why. Neverland had thrown him many a curve ball, but never before had it forced a woman in his path. Grace had said that Faith would be "good for him" but he didn't quite believe that. Faith did not appear to be someone capable of drawing a sword or shooting a pistol, clearly she was not cut out for this life. In a lot of ways, Hook saw her as another burden forced onto him by his curse, and despite that, Hook was not about to treat her as if she were of lesser worth than himself. He had recognised that much like he had once been, she was a person lost and alone in this strange world. He could see parts of himself in her. The fear and uncertainty so clearly written in her expression had once made a home within Hook's own heart when he had first arrived in Neverland. He was so intimately familiar with these feelings, yet he was sure that there were fears in Faith's heart that he could never possibly know. Her first night in Neverland had already contained so much pain, and he had caused part of it. Hook's own first night in Neverland, although confusing and sad in its own right, had been enveloped in a certain kind of peace. He had known what to do when stranded and alone, and had done so. He had been alone when the impossible wave had hit, an emergency fishing expedition in the middle of the ocean. The wind had been gone for days. A week, perhaps longer even. The wave that had hit him and taken him so far from his crew should not have been possible. Somehow Hook had survived, the boat he had been in had survived. He had kept that boat as a tribute to his survival, a good luck charm of sorts. The very same boat that was being lowered down and would soon collect him, so that ship and captain could be reunited.  
The longboat reached the docks, rowed by a single pirate. Hook helped Faith step over the edge and get seated before getting in, himself. Despite his apprehensions, he was still a gentleman and he would not have the woman suffer any more on his account. He would have rowed himself, but the pirate sharing the boat was young, a fresh recruit who was desperate to impress his captain. His shaved head glistened with sweat as he rowed at top speed towards the ship. The closer they got, the sicker Faith felt. It was all real. She had tried to pretend otherwise, convince herself it was a dream, had tried to wake herself up by repeatedly reaching through the pocket slits in her skirt and pinching her thighs. It was no good. It was all real and she was going to be a pirate. The longboat jerked as it was winched upwards, each jerk bringing Faith closer to being sick. Her head was spinning again, she was going to be sick, it was going to happen and it was going to be awful. Her head spun faster and faster, her vision blurred and everything started to go dark.  
The stress had been too much, Faith had fainted, luckily Hook had been watching her, and had caught her before her head had hit the side of the boat. Faith, of course, did not know this. Her whole existence had simply faded away and then just as simply had returned. Faith woke up on a soft bed in a dim room that she didn't recognise. A large desk stood nearby and the walls were lined with bookshelves. At the very back of the room sat a plush looking sofa, on that sofa sat a man. He looked up at her, over the top of his wire frame spectacles.  
"You feeling alright?" He asked in a soft Irish accent.  
"Where am I?" Faith asked, "who are you? Where's-"  
The Irish man shushed her sternly, before she could ask another question.  
"You're in the Captain's quarters, and I am the ship's quartermaster, Mr. Smee."  
"Why am I in his quarters?"   
"Cap'n ordered it. Below deck is no place for a lady he said. I said the whole ship's no place for a lady but what would I know? I'm just quartermaster after all." He trailed off, realising how impolite he must sound. Whilst Faith was sure that what Mr. Smee had said was true, and that the ship was indeed no place for her to be, she found some relief in the fact that Hook at least seemed like he intended to keep her away from immediate danger.  
"Cap'n asked me to keep an eye on you." Mr. Smee continued talking, "look after you and such whilst you settle in. Is there anything you'll be needing now that you're awake? There's water on the desk if you're thirsty. I suppose I can sort some bread if you're hungry, too."   
Faith shook her head.  
"I'm fine, thanks."  
"Well if you're sure."  
Faith nodded quietly and Mr. Smee left the room. Alone at last, Faith took the opportunity to look around, really look, taking everything in. From the wash basin and mirror by the door to the thick velvet curtains that could be drawn across the bed. The ornate desk with a neat stack of ledgers and log books near the edge. The crystal carafe of water. Everything about this room told Faith that Hook was a very rich man, indeed. Everything she could see was ornately decorated, even the wardrobe had a complicated filigree pattern carved into it. The things that interested Faith the most, though, were the books. There were hundreds lining the walls, with no particular order to them, some titles that she recognised and many more that she did not. There was fiction, non fiction, Shakespeare's plays, books on languages and history, fairytales and fables. Books from many eras, but none that Faith would have called modern at all. The closest to her time that she could find was 'Frankenstein' she had read it once before at school and had loved it then. She had always enjoyed literature classes, it was one of the few times that a class might be quiet and she wouldn't have to deal with the comments from Lucy or her friends. Stories had always been Faith's escape from her troubles, she could devour multiple books in a single day if given the chance. Simply holding the leather bound copy of Frankenstein gave her some sort of calm, so Faith sat herself on the sofa and began to read. The candles had already been lit, and the curtains drawn when she came to, so Faith paid little attention to the sky outside and gave even less thought to what the time may be. She barely even registered the sound of laughter coming from beyond the door, until it opened.  
Hook entered the room in a far better mood than he had been earlier, he had been drinking with the crew and had just started to feel the effects of the rum, the red flush of drunkenness spread over his bronze cheeks. He approached Faith with the sort of confidence only found in those who have been drinking.  
"We're having a bit of a celebration." He started, "I was wondering if you might join us?"  
Faith looked up at him, confused.  
"If you want me to, I guess." She said with a shrug, Hook frowned at her uncertainty and offered his hand.  
"I would not have asked you if I didn't, please accompany me."  
Faith thought for a second, staring at his hand, just as he was about to withdraw it, Faith placed her hand on Hook's. The sensation was almost sobering, it had been a long time since anyone had touched him so gently. A delicate lily had been placed upon a long forgotten grave. Hook wrapped his fingers tightly around Faith's hand and led her outside to the main deck. He sat on a large crate in front of a pair of men and beckoned Faith to do the same. Immediately he dove back into whatever conversation they had been having. Faith looked at the two men sitting before her, studying their appearance. One was dark skinned and bald with a scruffy beard. He spoke in deep and measured tones and had a booming laugh. The other was slight and blond, he spoke with a French accent. He appeared to be quite a bit younger than the other man and spoke with his hands, gesturing wildly, the bottle he held always verging on the edge of spilling its contents. He reminded Faith of a young man she once met at a comic shop who had been so excited about a new toy he was buying. She focused on the Frenchman, trying desperately not to look at the man beside her. Hook still seemed so intimidating, but the more she tried not to look, the more Faith couldn't help but look. There was just something about him she found enthralling.  
Faith was only able to draw her eyes away from the captain when she felt a small tug at her sleeve. A young boy had been trying to get her attention.  
"Miss?" He said, "can I get you some rum? We've got dark rum, spiced rum and-"  
"I don't know you." Hook interrupted him.  
"I'm Tootles, sir." The boy replied, not daring to look Hook in the eye.  
"Tootles? Not Pan's Tootles? The lost boy?"  
"I'm not a lost boy any more." Tootles said, defiantly.  
"So you want to be a pirate, eh?"  
"Yes, sir."  
"So you're willing to turn your back on Pan and swear loyalty to me? Do you promise to be good, brave, and follow every order?"  
"Aye Captain!"  
"Well then, welcome aboard, my boy!" Hook took Tootles in a tight hug and smiled broadly, exposing the gold teeth at the back of his mouth, "your first order, fetch our lady here a bottle of our best coconut rum, Smee will show you where it's kept."  
Faith tried to protest, she didn't feel like drinking, but Tootles did not want to disobey his captain and ran off to get the rum. He returned quickly, carefully carrying the bottle of rum. He handed it to Faith with a small bow, blushing when she thanked him. Hook waved the boy off and turned his attention to Faith.  
"You're not even going to try it?" He pressed, upon seeing her place the bottle on the floor.  
"I- uh…" Faith started to protest, but decided it just wasn't worth it. She picked the bottle back up, intending to humour the captain by taking a sip of rum, she had not been expecting it to taste quite so nice. "It's good." She told him. Hook beamed.  
"It's actually my own recipe, you know."  
"A man of many talents, then." Faith said. The French pirate laughed.  
"Many talents?" He scoffed, "What? Like shouting, and yelling, and telling me what to do-" Faith was sure that he was about to make Hook very angry, but instead his joke had been cut short by the captain's own booming laughter. He had a warm laugh that some people would even describe as hearty, the type of laugh that invited others to laugh along with him. Hearing Hook laugh made Faith feel more at ease than she had since arriving in Neverland, there was something familiar in his laughter that made her feel at home, it washed over her in a comforting wave and wrapped around her being like a warm blanket on a cold winter's night, and soon Faith found herself laughing along with him.  
"Aha!" The French pirate exclaimed, "Little lady does have a voice! I was beginning to think I've heard mice below deck that made more noise!" He stretched out a bony hand, "I'm Hugo, but most of these bastards just call me 'cook', bastard next to me is Mo."  
Mo nodded in recognition as Faith took Hugo's hand and introduced herself.   
"So." Hugo continued talking, "we know your name, you know ours, how about a little drinking game? A proper get to know you?" He didn't wait for any responses to his suggestion before going into the rules that he had just made up on the spot. "It's simple, you get asked a question, if you answer you get to ask us something, if you do not answer then you drink."  
It sounded simple enough, at first the questions were basic and uninteresting. Where are you from? How old are you? What do you like to do? All of the questions directed towards Faith followed the same banal pattern until Hook asked,  
" _When_ are you from? What year was it?"  
"2018." Faith told him.  
"Christ." Hook said, shocked, "you're so… you're so young." Young was the only word he could think of that could quite fit how he felt, if he had not been in Neverland he would have been dead for hundreds of years by the time Faith was born. Suddenly Mo started laughing, sputtering his drink everywhere.  
"Captain's a fucking cradle snatcher." He laughed.  
"I'm only thirty-fucking-eight." Hook protested, he hated being made to feel old.  
"And she’s only twenty-five, besides, how long have you been thirty-eight for?" Mo teased.  
"Long enough." Hook said through gritted teeth, "and I believe it's the turn for our lady to ask a question." The subject changed, Hook turned to Faith. He watched her intently, she had not yet asked a single thing of him and that had not gone unnoticed. She was quiet for more than just a moment, a single question had been burning inside her mind all evening, but she hadn't been brave enough to ask. She looked Hook straight in the eyes, but only for a second, the intensity of his gaze too much for her to handle.  
"What made you change your mind?" She asked, "about me?"  
Hook's eyes did not leave Faith, he hadn't really thought about it. Grace had told him to take her, yes. But there was more to it. Grace would have said that destiny was making itself known. Hook did not believe in destiny, though, and had chalked it up to his own guilt.  
"You were alone and afraid. You had seen some of the worst this island has to offer. You need someone who can protect you. Seemed fitting that it should be me, after how I added to all of your troubles." He told her honestly, "what changed your mind about me?" Hook turned his whole body to face Faith, cutting out the outside world, her answer was all he cared to hear. She had been afraid of him, she had perhaps even hated him, yet she still agreed to come with him, and earlier that same evening she had willingly taken his hand. No woman had touched him so softly in such a long time, but Faith had. Her hand was so unlike his own. Delicate, soft, pale, so small. She had trusted him with her touch.  
"I don’t know." Faith said quietly, "you just seemed, you know, different when you came back after-"  
Mo let out a laugh again.  
"I think that means she wants to fuck you." He said pointedly.  
"What?" Faith spat out, "I do not! I mean, no offence, but I don't even know you, Captain-"  
"C'mon," Mo interrupted, "You've hardly been able to keep your eyes off him all night."  
Faith quickly lowered her gaze to the now half empty bottle of rum in her hands.  
"Probably staring at my scar." Hook said trying to save Faith from the embarrassment and running his hand down the right side of his face to emphasise the point.  
"I've seen people stare at your scars Captain, and that was not it." Mo continued with a grin that said that he thought he knew all there was to know about Faith and her alleged feelings.  
"Well it must have been my hook then. You've all stared at it enough. A lovely young woman such as this would never be so interested in an old man like me." Hook thought he had settled the matter.  
"I thought you were only thirty-fucking-eight, Captain?" Mo asked with a sly grin.   
Faith remained quiet, drinking from the bottle, she felt thoroughly embarrassed and also frustrated. How could anyone think that she was attracted to Hook? It was absurd. Hook glared at Mo. More often than not, a single look was all that Hook needed to put an end to foolish behaviour from his crew.  
"My God! It was just a joke, Captain! I'm sorry." He apologised, before leaving the small group and causing the abrupt end to the drinking game. Hugo tried to make conversation, but the mood had shifted, Faith had retreated back into herself, drinking quietly whilst the men talked business. The night pressed on, and no man on board seemed to be slowing down with their drinking, if anything they appeared to be getting more lively, singing songs, acting out lewd jokes, raucous laughter. Occasionally men would approach Hook with an attempt at wit and a request for him to join them. He refused every request, instead choosing to stay by Faith's side. He did not believe her to be safe on her own amongst his drunken men, too many of them held fast to the superstition of women bringing bad luck to a ship. He had instinctively placed his arm around Faith's shoulders every time he had been approached, the small signal that she was 'off limits'. Each time, Hook felt her become tense beneath his touch. He understood why she was so uncomfortable with him, but still, he did not like it. It was a reminder of how he had acted, a reminder of his worst side. He could have been so much better, but he had chosen not to be.  
Faith shivered besides Hook, the night's air had become quite cold.   
"You should go back inside." Hook said, "it's only going to get colder."  
Faith did not protest, she was very cold and quite tired to boot. As she stood, Faith realised just how drunk she was, the rum had been so sweet and smooth that she had no issues drinking it, and hadn't realised how close she had come to finishing the bottle. She stumbled slightly and would have tripped had Hook not been there with his arm around her waist. Inside his quarters, the captain guided Faith to the bed. He watched as she peeled the curtains back, her hands shaking. Suddenly Faith felt more nervous and afraid than she had all night. She hadn't thought about her sleeping arrangements. She was in his quarters, this was his bed. She sat herself at the edge, gripping the blankets tightly in her fists, waiting for Hook to move, for what she thought was inevitable. He took a step closer and sat himself at her side. He wanted to explain himself, he wanted to apologise, he wanted a lot of things. He sighed and turned to Faith, leaning in slightly, so that he could face her, and tell her plainly that he had no ill intentions towards her, but Faith spoke first, afraid of what might happen.  
"Don't come any closer," she begged, "I don't want-"  
Hook sighed deeply, he felt hurt knowing what her assumptions of him must be. He had done many terrible things before, but not that, never that.  
"You need not be so afraid of me." He tried to assure her, "I will never share a bed with you. I will never even try it. I'll not even touch you. You have my word."  
Faith relaxed slightly upon hearing this, yet she did not appear happy.  
"Am I really so unattractive?" She mumbled after a few moments of uncomfortable silence. Hook looked at the woman as if she were the most complicated and confusing puzzle he had ever laid eyes on. She did not want him to touch her. She had made it clear, multiple times that evening, that she was not attracted to him. Yet now she seemed so displeased with his promise not to lay so much as a finger upon her.  
"No." Hook said. He could not lie, for he did find Faith to be an attractive woman, "I simply refuse to share a bed with any woman who does not want me. I'm not a monster." His assurances against his darkest impulses were always as much for himself as they were for his audiences. Hook often had to remind himself that he wasn't the monster that so many others thought him to be. He could do monstrous things, he had committed acts that could be called evil, but he was not a monster. He just wasn't. To be a monster would be to forsake his humanity, to give in once and for all. He couldn't do that, he wouldn't do that.  
Hook left Faith quickly, desperate to get back to drinking and gain sweet distraction from his own mind. He sat back down in front of Hugo with a groan.  
"Why is it," he started, "that I must always be the man that women fear, and never the man that they might love?"  
Hugo could not answer his captain, he didn't know. He thought that James Hook was a good man. He had been, at times, like an older brother to him. He had kept the younger man's secrets, and given him the chance to prove himself despite what others may have thought. Hook had been the one to teach him English and the ways of Neverland. Hook had given him a home when others would have left him to rot.  
"Love?" Hugo questioned, "you like the woman then?"  
Hook shrugged, he hadn't really thought much about whether he liked Faith or not. He had considered her usefulness to his crew, and felt like he owed her a debt. He had sworn to protect her, but he had yet to think about much else. He ran his hand over his beard. He didn't know much about Faith at all,she had been so quiet, hadn't told him anything. But when they had been drinking, when she had finally started to relax, Hook had started to see her, some of her at least. She had piqued his interest, captured his attention. Perhaps it was just the novelty of having someone so modern around, Hook didn't know. Mo had ruined it with his bad joke and had sent Faith back into her shell.  
"I've only just met her, I don't know her." Hook said at last, echoing the sentiment that Faith had said about him earlier, "but, I think that I would like to."  
That night, true to his word, Hook laid himself down on his sofa. Faith had drawn the curtains by the bed closed, the pirate could not see her. He wondered if like himself, she was having trouble sleeping or if she could be having fantastical dreams. He wondered if she had thought as much about him as he had about her. The truth was that Faith had thought about little else other than Hook that night, it bothered her greatly. She rolled from side to side, trying to sleep but her mind still raced. When she finally did sleep, it was a sleep without dreams. There was only the calm darkness.


	6. who are you

Faith awoke to the muffled sounds of work and voices outside of the door, and the creaking of a ship at sail. A window had been cracked open, letting in the smell of sea air and a cool breeze. Faith pulled the curtains open and looked around the room. She was alone. A small plate had been placed upon the desk. A slice of bread, some cheese, and some grapes. Breakfast. Faith ate slowly, savouring every bite. From what she had understood about pirates, she thought that this may be the last good meal she would have for a while. After eating, Faith went to the small wash basin, she splashed some water over her face and looked in the mirror. She looked exhausted, dark circles around her pale olive coloured eyes, prominent against her pale skin. She raised a hand to her cheek, wishing that she had some cleanser to hand, some moisturiser, a serum, anything to make her feel less dead. The longer she looked in the mirror, the more faults she found. Broken capillaries and redness, thin eyebrows, stubby eyelashes, a double chin. At least her lips were full and shapely, and her skin relatively clear. She had always held on to those two features as a point of pride. Lucy always had taken great pleasure in comparing herself to her stepsister. Lucy was tall, Lucy was thin, Lucy had good eyebrows, Lucy had blue eyes, Lucy had platinum blonde hair that was perfectly straight, not like the unruly pile of straw that grew from Faith's head. But Lucy never could say a thing about Faith's skin as Faith hardly ever broke out. Faith had been secretly delighted when Lucy had developed acne as a teenager, but it didn't matter anymore. Nothing really mattered. Faith was in Neverland and Lucy was not. Faith was alone now, she had felt alone before, but now she really was. There was no cat to cuddle, no grandmother to share words of comfort. All Faith had was herself, well, herself and a ship full of pirates, somehow that felt worse than having no one at all. Taking a deep breath, Faith stepped back from the mirror and started to dress herself. Layers of petticoats, and tightly laced stays that were not at all fun to put on. Faith felt like she would never get used to wearing these clothes, as much as she had struggled with the lacing of everything, she struggled more with the straight pins in her bodice, pricking her fingers multiple times. It was a bright day, but Faith did not want to leave the cabin, the thought of just opening the door and stepping into the deck was horrifying. Instead, she returned to the book she had picked up the night before.   
Faith had always found it easy to lose herself in books, stories were her escape. No matter her troubles, she could always open a book and become someone else for a little while, forgetting the pains and torments of her real life. She had found similar relief in films and TV shows, too, but books had always been her first choice. She liked reading old books most, transporting herself to the past. She had read the Anne of Green Gables books time and time again, and had often daydreamed about Prince Edward Island, the lake of shining waters and way of white delight. She daydreamed about dresses with puffed sleeves and falling in love. But that was just a dream, she knew that she could never have that type of life or love. Perhaps that was why she had been so drawn towards horror as she grew older, stories of monsters and evil, stories where love wasn't important. Stories where darkness took ahold. Stories that reflected the despair she felt inside. Then there was Frankenstein, the book in her hands, with a monster who felt so deeply, could love and hate with equal passion. Who indulged in such darkness because his need for love could not be satisfied. Faith would have been lying if she were to say she could not identify with that desire. There had been times where she had felt so hideous, and so unloveable that she had wanted to scream and tear the whole world apart. Instead she had done what had been expected of her, she stayed quiet and internalised those feelings. The more Faith read, the more she lost herself in the book, forgetting her troubles, forgetting Neverland, forgetting Hook. Until he entered the room. He approached quietly, much as he had the night before.  
"So, you like scary stories?" He asked, breaking the awkward silence.  
"I guess so." Faith answered, not looking up from the page.  
"I always enjoyed reading Shakespeare's plays, myself." Hook tried to make conversation, "Have you ever read them?"  
"A few, I saw Romeo and Juliet once." Faith glanced up from the book, briefly making eye contact with the man standing before her.  
"I would have thought Macbeth would be more to your interest."  
"I didn't have a choice, it was for school."  
"You're educated?"  
Faith nodded, to her it was a bizarre question, of course she was educated, but to Hook it was stranger still to hear of a woman who went to school. He stood awkwardly for a moment before speaking again, "tell me about your studies."   
"There's not much to say." Faith said, "I liked literature classes, and history the best. We actually spent several months studying pirates."  
Hook gave a small chuckle.  
"Us pirates made enough of an impact that there are classes taught about us?"  
"There are people who have made the study of pirates their whole careers."  
Hook couldn't quite believe it, to be remembered as important even hundreds of years in the future. Desperate men trying to make ends meet had managed to leave their mark on the world after all. Upon learning this, he felt a sense of pride about his past. There was much that he wanted to know, questions he had never been able to ask another person, but now he had the chance he felt like to do so would be improper.  
Hook came to Faith at the same time each day, always asking questions about what she had been reading, her life, and her studies. He listened intently to each and every answer. Every day the captain found himself staying that bit longer, their conversations became deeper, Hook wouldn’t admit it then, but he had grown to look forward to these little breaks. He liked being able to discuss the books he had read with someone who cared about the stories like he had when reading them for the first time. It came as a shock to Faith that on the fifth day, Hook did not come asking his usual stream of questions, and instead had extended her an invitation.  
"Would you accompany me outside?" He asked, "It's not good to be shut inside so long." He offered his hand, just like he had before, but then quickly retracted it having remembered his promise to not touch her. Faith accepted the invitation out of politeness. She didn’t want to risk Hook’s anger or disappointment.  
They walked side by side around the deck stopping at the ship's edge, in a spot out of the way of the working men. Hook turned his gaze to a point in the distance where he could just about make out the shape of an island. Closing his eyes, he took several deep breaths, appreciating the warmth of the sun against his skin. It was a nice day, perfect for sailing. Warm, bright, no chance of rain, and a good breeze behind the sails. The kind of day where the men could relax and not worry so much about work.  
"Is it always like this?" Faith asked.  
"No." Hook replied, "but that's what makes days like this just so."  
Faith stood facing out to the clear blue ocean, the water so calm that it blended seamlessly with the sky at the horizon, an exquisite sheet of sapphire laid over the world. The wood beneath her feet creaked with the rocking of the ship, each sound, each feeling, filled Faith with an odd calmness. She had only spent a few days in this strange land, but it hardly felt that way, so many events had come to pass in the time leading up to this moment, it was hard to imagine it all happening in such a small time frame. Then suddenly, everything stopped, the world slowed down, giving her the space to make sense of her surroundings. Faith had tried to make sense of it all, tried to rationalise it all, but it felt impossible. She could understand the ship, she had read about pirate ships before. She could even perhaps understand the pirates around her, they were after all, just men. But the man standing so closely beside her, she just couldn't understand. As a child, Faith knew that Captain Hook was just a character in a story book, she had read that book so many times that it had fallen apart at the spine. Knowing that the pirate captain wasn't real had been the thing that had eased her childhood nightmares. But now, the man who shouldn't be, stubbornly continued to exist.  
Faith found herself staring at him, trying to find a slither of something there that would make sense and help her understand. There was something about the man that felt both familiar and unfamiliar all at the same time. She had once read that James Hook was handsome, but she had also read that he was somewhat disgusting, too. That didn't seem accurate at all, though. She couldn't find one thing about his appearance that she would call disgusting. The differences between the man she had encountered in the pages of a book and the man standing next to her were manifold. Hook's hair did not hang like black candles as it had once been described, instead his curls were full and natural, sometimes bordering on unruly. And whilst Faith supposed that there must have been a time where he would have been called handsome, the word didn't seem to apply any more. He wasn't exactly ugly, or even wholly unattractive. Faith thought that perhaps weathered would be the right word for him. Hook could have looked a much younger man, perhaps even younger than the thirty-eight that he claimed to be, if it wasn't for the excessive sun damage upon his skin. The fine lines and uneven tanning told stories of hardship and a long life. If his skin didn't give his age away, his hair would. Despite the youthful quality to his curls, the greys creeping through his hairline and beard told another story altogether. Even his eyes, that were just as perfectly blue as they had once been described, were not the eyes of someone that would easily be called handsome. His right eye was disturbed by the large and unsightly scar that ran from his brow to jaw, passing through his lips. It pulled tightly at his skin, distorting his expressions. This was never so apparent as when he smiled. When Hook smiled, his face twisted unevenly, scar tissue pulling at his top lip in a way that he never got used to seeing in the mirror.  
James Hook had once thought of himself as handsome, his high cheekbones, strong jaw, and lightly bronzed skin had once drawn women towards him. Piracy had changed that, it had changed him. His face, he knew, was hard to love. His body, harder still. If the scarring upon his face was ugly, then the scars that lay across his body made him monstrous, and there was no sight worse than his right arm once his hook was removed. He had heard whispers, gossipping, words he was not meant to hear. 'Mangled' they had called it, 'twisted' they had said, hideous, disgusting, ghastly. Hook could sometimes still see the man he used to be in the mirror, if he tilted his head to the correct angle, and the light hit his face the right way, he could just about make himself out. However the moment he would move or the light obscured, James Hook would no longer be visible and only the old and weary pirate would remain.  
Hook had not noticed the woman staring at him, he had been far too lost in his own thoughts. Faith watched as his brow furrowed into tight knots, wondering what he could be thinking about. Had she had the nerve to ask, Hook would have been very flustered, as he had been thinking about her. Grace had told him so little about their supposed destiny.  
"Perhaps it is that you will kill her." She had mused, "Perhaps she will kill you. Perhaps you will fall in love. Perhaps you will fall in love and then she will kill you- I'm not sure I would blame her too much for that."   
Hook had huffed and not taken her statement too seriously, he could not picture Faith as being dangerous enough to kill him, nor did he think it possible for anyone to fall in love with him. Could it really be that he was destined to kill this woman? What could she possibly do to deserve it? Suddenly Faith squealed, pulling Hook from his thoughts. She was pointing into the water.  
"Captain! It's a whale! I've never seen one in person before." The sight of the graceful creature had made Faith forget herself, she had never seen a whale anywhere other than on TV before. Hook turned his gaze to where she had been pointing.  
"It's only small. Probably a baby." As he spoke, a much larger whale surfaced for air, jumping in an arc and sending a wave towards the ship. The sight was common for Hook, he saw whales, dolphins, and countless other sea creatures on a near daily basis, he had almost forgotten the wonder of seeing such animals for the first time. Faith was joyful, excited, happily watching the whales.   
"Oh my God! It's so cool, I'm going to have to tell my Bubbe-" she trailed off, happiness gone, she wouldn't be able to tell her grandmother anything. She would likely never see her grandmother again. This was her life now. She had no one aside from the captain, and she wasn't sure that he really wanted her around. He had argued vehemently with Grace that he didn't want her with him. His arm had been twisted, coerced into the situation. Perhaps it would have been better if he had killed her when Grace had given that option. Faith returned silently to the captain's quarters, hoping that Hook would not follow her. She did not want him to see her cry.  
After that day, it became a near daily occurrence for Hook to invite Faith out to the deck with him. A quiet affair where he would point out things about the ship and how it ran, or he would take her to the edge to look for whatever sea life would pop up that day. The joy she experienced when seeing these animals and landscapes was infectious. A pod of dolphins jumping out of the water had almost brought her to tears. Never in her life had Faith dreamed that she might see nature so pure. There was not a single place left on earth that looked like Neverland. It was then that for the first time, Faith thought that maybe she could get used to life in Neverland after all. That calm, that peace of mind had been quickly dashed by the loud call of,  
"Sails! Sails towards port!" As soon as the call had been given, the ship came to life. Loud talking, men rushing around handing out weapons. Hook turned on his heel and stormed towards the bow end of the ship, snatching a telescope from the hands of another pirate as he did. He peered out, looking towards the white sails in the distance. He turned again, looking for Faith, but she had not followed him and was now lost in the mass of men gathering to hear their next orders.   
"Merchant ship." Hook said to Mr. Smee, "we'll take it. You know what to do."  
He left his men, walking off in the same determined fashion as he had first approached them. His eye darted around the deck looking for Faith, but she wasn’t there. He found her, eventually, back in his quarters. Reading once again.  
"There's going to be a fight." He said  
"I know, I heard." Faith replied, looking up from the book, her eyes lingered on his for only a second before she averted her gaze. Hook's eyes, as pleasant as they were, made Faith feel like he was staring straight through her, and into her soul.  
"I want you to stay in here." He pulled a key from one of his belt chains and placed it on his desk. "Lock the door after I leave, do not unlock it until I tell you to. Not for Mr. Smee, not for Hugo, only for me. Do you understand?"  
"Yes."  
"Good." Hook turned his back to Faith, and stopped at the wash basin. He picked up a small silver pot and drew from it a stick made of bone and covered in black powder. He carefully ran the powder between his eyelids, and smudged it around his eyes. Hook thought it made him look quite intimidating, but when he turned back to Faith to give her a few more words of warning, the look on her face took him by surprise. She did not eye him with fear or apprehension as she had since they had met, she appeared almost entranced by him. His eyes had been one of the first things she had noticed about him, the eyes so rich a blue colour that she could lose herself in them as easily as she could get lost at sea. Now, surrounded by darkness, all of the wonderful shades in Hook's eyes stood out. The azure blue of the sky, warm teals of the oceans, and the almost lilac colour of forget-me-nots, but the thing that Faith noticed above all else in Hook's eyes, was the great sadness he carried in them.   
"You will be okay, won't you?" She asked him.  
"Your concern is touching." Hook said with a smile, "you need not fear for my safety, I will survive, I always do."  
"Are you sure?" Faith asked  
"I swear it." He placed his hand over his heart, a show of sincerity.  
Faith did not understand where her concern about Hook’s safety had come from. Up until he had turned around and she had seen that look in his eyes, she had been sure that whatever it was she felt about him wasn’t at all good or kind. She had been afraid of him, she hadn't liked him, and now she found herself feeling afraid for him, it made no sense. Breathing deeply and trying to push her feelings aside, Faith obeyed her orders and locked the door as soon as Hook had left. She then placed the key back on his desk. She didn't know how long it would take, and was bothered by just how much she was bothered by it all. Earlier that day she would not have cared about Hook returning to her in one piece. She shuddered at her thoughts, returning to her, she didn't just want him to come back unharmed, she wanted him to come back to her. Could it be the connection that Grace had said they had? Faith didn't understand, how could they be connected? Grace hadn't explained much at all.  
"It is the same, and it is not." She had said. Did that mean that she, Faith, was the same as Hook? Or not the same at all? If stories she had heard as a child were true, then she did not want to be like him at all. But if those stories were true, would he have made space for her in his life at all? If the stories were true, wouldn't he have killed her the moment Grace had given him the option? Faith swore in frustration, it had taken the man all of five days to get inside her head. She tried sitting back down to read, but her thoughts kept racing. Nerves for the upcoming fight, confusion and thoughts of Hook. She could just about hear the muffled sound of him bellowing orders outside, and then it came. The first round of canon fire. Shouts. Another round. Then the ship shook, Faith lost her balance and fell into the desk's corner, catching her head. She was bleeding.  
"Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck." She held her hand to her head, trying to think of what to do. She couldn't go outside, there was too much noise to call for help. Faith rushed to the mirror to see the damage. A deep gash at her hairline producing a steady stream of blood. She prodded at the reddened skin around the cut. It did not happen immediately, but the more Faith fussed over her forehead, the less it bled until the only blood left was that which had dried to her skin. Faith thought, at first, that the cut must not have been as bad as it had appeared, but upon splashing her face with water and cleaning the area she found no cut- just a fresh scar. It had happened again, she had been healed.  
The fight was over quicker than Faith thought it would be, and Hook was knocking at the door, she opened it quickly but was swiftly pushed aside by the ship's physician.  
"Stand outside." he ordered, "I don't need some woman fretting whilst I work." He sneered, pushing Hook inside. Faith was only able to catch a glimpse of the captain before being forced out onto the deck. His white shirt was covered in blood, and from the red trail across the deck it appeared that he wasn't doing well at all.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wish I could import straight from scrivener.

Clearly the captain had been injured, and by the trail of blood left across the deck, it was bad. Faith waited outside of the door, watching the other men carry their latest trophies. Sugarcane, rum, flour, and a few closed chests that she assumed contained gold. The contents of those chests didn't bother Faith, she was far more concerned about what was happening inside the captain's quarters. She tried pressing her ear up against the door, but was met with silence.  
"Hugo!" Faith called out when she spotted the French pirate, he came to her quickly, "what happened? With the captain? Is he okay?" She asked her questions in rapid succession, not allowing Hugo to answer before the next came pouring from her mouth.  
"The old bastard will be fine. He only got shot in the shoulder."  
"The shoulder?" Faith's face went as white as paper, "that's not… there's a major artery there. He could die."  
"He'll be fine." Hugo insisted. He had, after all, seen his captain bounce back from far worse, "Mr. Yates is the best physician there is, unless you count the Chinese we sometimes do business with. Don't worry."  
Faith breathed deeply, she couldn't not worry. Hugo touched her shoulder gently.  
"Don't worry?" She repeated, "people die from being shot even in my time! Even with sterile environments and proper medical equipment-"  
"Look, you can't help him by worrying." He cut her off, "come with me, I picked up some kittens and their mama from the other ship. Think I'll need some help with them." He sighed deeply "Most of the bastards on this ship can't be trusted to feed themselves, let alone think of keeping three little beasties fed!" He laughed, although his statement hadn't been all that far from reality. The men around him often had the tendency towards putting more effort into their drinking and games than their work.  
Faith went with the Frenchman, still on edge, but glad of the distraction. She hadn't particularly liked being out on the deck, hadn't liked having nothing to do but wait, hadn't liked worrying about Hook so much. The kittens were the perfect distraction. One was almost all black aside from a white spot upon its nose, and so tiny it fit neatly in the palm of her hand. The other, much like its mother, was a tortoise shell. Faith held all three cats in her lap on the floor, smiling at them.  
"They're lovely." She said, scratching the mother cat behind her ears.  
"They're your problem now. Ha!" Hugo replied triumphantly, "I have my hands full with the dairy goats and chickens."  
"You have chickens?" Faith couldn't quite believe it, she had heard of pirates keeping a goat or two around, but had never thought about chickens or other livestock  
"Of course, we have chickens! Where else would I get the eggs to make bread?" Hugo paused briefly, only to take a short breath before continuing his rambling speech, "you know, my old captain didn't like to keep many animals… preferred using the space for more valuable cargo." Hugo spoke quickly and almost endlessly. He ranted about his previous captain, the many nights he had been forced to go hungry. He assured Faith that Hook was different, though, and started explaining all of the ways in which being a pirate in Neverland was different to anywhere else, better in fact, "there may be less freedom, but we don't go hungry, and the captain knows how to look after us well. He's a good captain."  
Faith listened to Hugo talk on and on, telling stories about the ship, about the captain, about the fleet, about the crew. By the sounds of it, he knew everything about everyone.  
"I think you make him nervous." He said, lifting a heavy pot and placing it on the stove.  
"What?" Faith asked  
"The captain, I think you make him nervous. He was worried about you staying safe." This was an assumption on Hugo's part. He hadn’t asked the captain about his feelings, but having known Hook for many years, and seen him in countless fights, he knew something was up. Hook was a strong fighter who ordinarily would never have been injured in such a way. It seemed blatantly obvious to Hugo that something had been distracting him recently, and the only thing the cook could think of that could have caused such a distraction was Faith.  
"I think he's more concerned about my scar than... well, me." Faith mumbled  
"Your scar?"   
"It's weird, I don't even understand it, it's just… you know…" she trailed off, unable to explain about the scar or alleged magic surrounding it, "he makes me nervous, too." She admitted, "he can be very scary."  
"He's not so bad. Not when you get to know him." Hugo paused, "he has been good to you, hasn't he?" Faith nodded. Hook had been good to her over the past days. He had been good to her ever since they had left Grace's cabin together. She turned her attention back to the cats, all three had crawled off of her lap and were curled up together in a wooden box in the corner.  
"You really think he'll be okay?" Faith asked. Her voice was shaky, no that the cats were out of her lap she had nothing to keep her mind away from what could be going on in the captain’s quarters.  
"Captain has seen worse than a few shots to the shoulder, he'll be fine. Christ! go see him if you're so worried."  
"Yates didn't want me there. Told me to stay out of his way."  
"Fuck Yates. He's a good physician, but fuck him. Go see the captain."  
Mr. Yates was not at all happy when Faith returned to the captain's quarters.  
"What are you doing here?" He snapped, nose wrinkled in disgust, Faith shrunk into the shadows.  
"I just… is he okay?" She asked, barely louder than a mouse.  
"I'm fine, my dearest." Hook answered for himself. A thick, white sheet had been placed over the bed where Hook lay. Faith peered over Yates' shoulders and was horrified by what she saw. Hook's shoulder was a mess. One of the straps that held his hook secured over his body had been completely torn apart in the blast, chunks of leather clung to the area, blood still seeping down his torso. The wound itself was deep and wide, spreading from his shoulder down towards his chest.  
"Captain." Yates sighed in frustration as he bent over him with a pair of metal forceps he was using to remove shrapnel from the wound, "It would be a far simpler task if you would remove-"  
"The hook stays on." Hook interrupted. He had insisted on this since entering his quarters, "I don't want-"  
"Captain, please." The physician implored. Hook glanced briefly towards Faith before giving his final say on the matter.  
"No." He would not be removing the hook. He was far too ashamed of how ugly his arm was beneath it and he didn't want Faith to see it. He thought her to be far too delicate to see that horror. Yates huffed, then turned to Faith.  
"Well, if you are going to stay in here, girl, at least be of some use." He thrust a balled up rag into her hand, "for the blood." He gave this instruction loud and slow, as if Faith lacked the intelligence to follow otherwise. She cringed upon hearing this, the rag was disgusting. Even if it had come from the fresh stack of linen nearby, it had clearly been the only one used so far. She tossed it aside and picked up a fresh square. Even this bore the stains of having been used before.  
"Is there any alcohol?" Faith asked meekly, "to keep things at least kind of clean?"  
"Don't be so stupid, girl." Yates huffed, "do as you’re damn well told!"  
"You can't seriously be expecting me to put this filth encrusted thing on an open wound! It's not hygienic! It could make him sick!"  
"Hygienic! Pah!" Yates glared at Faith, "shut your mouth and do as you're damn well told. It's not a little girl's place to be questioning her betters."  
"Yeah, well, I'm not about to blindly follow medical orders from someone who probably still believes in the four fucking humours!" Faith's voice raised slightly, she would have given Yates a further telling off had Hook not started laughing at her outburst.  
"Check in the cupboard, under my desk." He said, taking a sharp breath. Laughing had done him no good, and with the adrenaline of battle wearing off, the pain had started to get to him. Faith rushed to the desk and withdrew the bottle of rum. It wasn't the best solution by far, but it was better than nothing. She rubbed the alcohol over her hands and wrists and soaked the rag.  
"It's not going to feel good." She warned the captain apprehensively, before pressing it on one of his wounds. Hook inhaled sharply, and swore loudly.   
Faith tried as best as she could to keep the area around Hook's shoulder clean whilst the physician silently picked out shrapnel and closed the smaller wounds with a needle and thread.  
"This one, I believe, ought to be packed." He had said, prodding the area next to Hook's largest of wounds, "but you would have to remove this apparatus to make space for the bandages." The tone of Yates' voice was that of a man seething with anger, trying to suppress it to maintain a veneer of professionalism.  
Hook had almost agreed to his request, and had he not seen the horrified look on Faith's face he would have let the physician have his way.  
"I want to hear what she has to say." Hook said.   
"Close it up… keep it clean." She said quietly, "I don't know, I'm not a doctor."  
"No." Yates agreed, "you're not." He reached for his herbs, intending to go ahead with packing them into Hook's wound.  
"I want you to do as she said." Hook told him, interrupting the preparations. Yates swore and tried to argue, but the captain had made up his mind. Yates picked up the thread, and despite his misgivings, carefully drew the wound edges together as best as he was capable of. The result was not pretty, but would suffice. The physician left the room in a foul mood.  
"I'll let the little miss do the bandages." He sneered, "since she seems to know so much." Yates slammed the door behind him, unable to hide his anger any longer. He felt emasculated, Faith made him look bad- incompetent even, with her interference. He did not like having his work questioned, and especially not by a woman whose place it was to be quiet and just do as she had been told. After he had left, stamping his way down the steps back below deck, Faith had taken another strip of fabric and soaked it in rum.   
"I'm sorry." Hook said, "Yates is a bastard." Faith shook her head, she didn't care about Yates. She was used to men like that. Her stepfather, Si, had a very similar temperament.  
"He didn't bother me." She told the captain, "not much, anyways."  
"Still, I'd advise you not to get in his way again. Don't do anything he might perceive as a slight. He's a malicious, nasty piece of work." Hook warned her.  
"I'll keep it in mind." She shrugged and started to gently clean Hook's shoulder, wiping away the dried blood and gunpowder from the shots he had taken. Hook winced from the stinging, he wasn't used to the burning sensation under his skin that came from having his injuries tended to in such a way.  
"Do you have to fucking do that?" He hissed as she pressed the alcohol soaked fabric over his shoulder once more.  
"Yes." Faith said bluntly, "unless you want these wounds to go septic. Then you might be calling Yates back up here to remove your left arm, too." Hook glared at her, "no? I take it that's not something you want. Good. Now stay still, or next time I'll stick it where the sun don't bloody shine." Hook blinked a few times.  
"Yes, ma'am." He tried to maintain his expression of being annoyed, but in the end he couldn't help but smile softly. This woman, even if only out of duty, cared about him.  
Faith was careful with the bandages, making sure they didn't interfere with the torn leather around Hook's chest. It was not easy, and she would have preferred if he had taken the thing off. That was out of the question, though, so she hadn't even asked.  
"What are you going to do about this?" She asked, her hand resting over the strap across Hook's chest.  
"I know a man." He said, struggling to push himself up, each movement accompanied by a pained groan. "I'm surprised that you care so much about my wellbeing," He noted.   
"Don't want you getting an infection or anything." Faith mumbled, not quite looking his way.  
"I'll survive." Hook promised, then looked at her seriously, "there is something I think that I ought to tell you, I should have done so sooner, but-"  
"Tell me what?" Faith regarded him suspiciously, surely this wasn’t a good time to be telling her something important. And if it was so important why had it taken him so long? She crossed her arms, waiting for some kind of explanation.  
"I was unsure if I should. It's... difficult. But you care about my wellbeing, and I do care about yours." Hook shifted uncomfortably at the edge of the bed, out of pain and discomfort with the conversation he was about to start, Faith's eyes narrowed further as his own turned to the floor, "It's, well, being in Neverland has a strange effect on one's body. We call it 'the purging'." He started to explain awkwardly. 'The purging', as the pirates called it, was a process that all grown people who come to Neverland went through. It was their belief that in order to live in Neverland, to gain the boon of their eternal youth, that everything from within them that came from outside must be purged. The first symptom that someone would go through this ordeal was the complete halting of normal bodily functions. Hook tried to explain it with tact, but it was not the sort of conversation anyone but a hardened nurse could have without feeling embarrassed. Faith thought for a moment on what she had heard. Then she realised that since arriving in Neverland she had not once needed to use the head, and as sick as she had felt she hadn't thrown up once.  
"Okay, that's strange." She admitted. Hook looked at her briefly out of the corner of his eye before turning his head back down towards the floor.  
"If you were to stay here only a short while, that would be all there is to it." He said, trying not to sound too frightening, "However, people who are here long-term." He paused, thinking of how to continue, "It's different for us, Neverland takes something from us, and in doing so, it makes us quite unwell. For a time." He paused again, dreading the next, and in his opinion, the worst part, "Men, we usually spend a week throwing our guts up. It's worse for women, though, because of, you know, the blood." Hook's cheeks flushed at the awkwardness of what he had said, he closed his eyes tight and scrunched up his face, waiting for Faith's inevitable fearful response. It never came. Instead he heard her trying to suppress a giggle.  
"So, I'm going to have a period?" She said, still trying not to laugh at how absurd it all sounded  
"No, it's much worse than that, you will feel like you're dying." as much as Hook wanted Faith to be prepared, he didn't dare mention that people had actually died during the purging. Knowing she would feel that way would be enough of a warning.  
"Let me guess… head spinning? Nausea? Burning hot? You feel like your insides are twisted up?" Faith asked  
"Well yes, but-"  
"I've gone through that every month since I was ten, I'll be fine."  
Hook grinned.  
"Ah, in that case you might be pleased to know that when all is said and done- you won't have to go through that again, whilst you're here, at least." Hook looked at Faith at last, his eyes eventually meeting hers. She had impressed him. First with the ease she had when stepping in to assist Mr. Yates, the way she had handled herself told him that she must be experienced in some things far beyond the physician's scope of knowledge. Then he had been impressed by her bravery in the face of the purging. He had seen grown men shudder in fear upon hearing about it, and Faith had just shrugged it off. Hook had seen a glimmer of what was inside the woman that Neverland had put in his path, and now he knew for certain that he wanted to see more. But Faith was so distant to him, more than a closed book, she was a locked chest with a missing key.   
"Captain." Faith said  
"Hmm?"  
"You should rest." She told him, "lay down, okay?" Hook fought the instruction, but his usual stubborn streak wasn’t there. He knew that she was only telling him what to do because she cared about him. In her own way. Like a tide rising and falling, change comes. It is inevitable. It comes gradually like the turning of the tides and all at once like an unexpected crashing wave. That wave of change had swelled in the cabin when Hook had left to go fight, and finally crashed as he stumbled back into his quarters leaving a trail of blood behind him. Faith cared about him, there was no going back on it now.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here have a song I was listening to a bunch whilst working on this piece  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YhtUfOnGJ3E

Mr. Smee stood outside of the captain’s quarters, listening to the argument coming from inside. That woman was trouble, he was certain of it. Yates had put in a complaint, and then there had been the gossip amongst the crew about the rows they had been hearing.  
“Don’t you fucking dare.” Hook’s voice was raised just enough to be clear through the heavy wooden door, but tempered enough to not be a yell. It was clear to Mr. Smee that he was holding his anger in.  
“For fucks sake!” Faith shouted, “I’m trying to help you, not fucking kill you!”  
“Help? If that’s what you call help, I don’t want it.” There was a brief silence, broken by the sound of a breaking glass and Faith swearing loudly.  
“You’re worse than a bloody child, you are.” She shouted, Mr. Smee could hear the exasperated look upon her face, and imagined her with her hands raised in frustration.  
“Am I really?” Hook replied.  
“I’ve known four year olds who get their wounds cleaned with less fuss. So sit your arse down and deal with it.”  
“Fine.” There was silence once more, then came the torrent of pained profanity from Hook. “Don’t think you’re coming with me to this island after this!” Hook told her, but Faith didn’t seem to care.  
“I didn’t want to anyways!” she yelled.  
“Fine!” Hook said, not quite matching her volume.  
“Fine.”  
“Fine.” The captain stormed from his quarters, slamming the door behind him and pulling at the slashed neck opening of his shirt. He seethed, silently, waiting for the anchor to be laid and the longboats ready to depart.  
Blackfort isle was one of many small islands in Neverland that remained under the control of Hook and his fleet. It was a place where skilled men could work. Builders, blacksmiths, tailors, and shoemakers could all be found there. It was a peaceful place, workers quietly doing their jobs without being rushed. The stop had been made out of necessity, after the battle to take the merchant ship, the Jolly Roger had sustained damage that needed repairs, and Hook wished to see the leather worker. He had visited the man, Vic Grey, many times over the years. Ever since he had first been given his hook. The apparatus that kept the hook attached to his body had been changed, adjusted, and repaired time and time again. Tight leather straps crossing his torso, pressing into his shoulders, attached to a sleeve of wood and metal that encased his right arm. It was heavy, and painful. On particularly long days the leather dug into his flesh, leaving raw red welts, and seeping wounds behind.   
Hook had left Faith alone, so he could visit Vic and get the shoulder strap of his hook's harness repaired without facing the shame of her seeing his arm. Vic held the broken leather in his rough hands.  
"What was it this time?" He asked, peering through his round spectacles.  
"Got shot." Hook grunted  
"Shot? Must have been point blank range to do this sort of damage."  
"It was. My shoulder got the worst of it."  
"Christ…" Vic shook his head and started to work on the shoulder strap. Vic Grey was an expert in his field, his father had worked with leather, as had his grandfather. He had already had decades of experience in the field when he found himself in Neverland, and had had decades more to perfect his skill. He hammered in small metal eyelets, and gave the leather strap a heavy clasp. Vic had assumed his job would be a quick one, until it came to piecing the harness back together. He sighed, and looked up at Hook, peering over his spectacles.  
"You really ought to return to me more often, these straps are quite worn down."  
"I like it that way." Hook said, kicking some dirt around on the floor, "more comfortable." He added. Unlike new leather, the old worn in straps of his hook were soft and moulded to his body. It made them less irritating, less likely to rub away at his skin, less likely to carve lines across his flesh.  
"It's no good, captain." Vic said, "the leather simply isn't strong enough to support this properly." He lifted the heavy sleeve to emphasise his point, "see, there are tiny tears all over these straps." Vic took his work seriously, and was especially concerned when it came to this job that he did for the captain.   
"Fine." Hook huffed, "You'll be wanting to take some measurements, then?" He wasn't going to argue. There was no point, he knew what Vic had told him was true, he just wasn't happy about the prospect of his arm and chest being torn open again. Vic was careful and precise in taking measurements, it was vital that he was exact in what he did. He had seen the effects of what ill-fitting leather had done to Hook in the past.  
"I was thinking," Vic said, "we could perhaps make it a bit more comfortable if I were to..." He trailed off and began searching through his desk for a sheet of paper, "you see here?" He showed the captain a sketch he had drawn, "If we change the straps around a bit, I could use a softer leather."  
"Do whatever you think is best." Hook told him, sitting in the back corner of the man's workshop, a frustrated scowl drawn across his face. Even though he wasn’t happy about the situation, he trusted Vic when it came to matters of his hook. Although the man was, by trade, a leather worker he was also talented in many other areas. He worked wood and metal as well as any other man, he could sew, too, when needed. He had worked closely with the Chinese pirates who had originally brought Hook his hook. It was very different then. A lightweight metal cuff with very thin, very tight, leather straps securing it to his forearm. It seemed like a good thing at first, until Hook had gotten into a fight and tried to parry with it. The hook had been torn from him, and the leather straps took some of his skin along with them as they were forced down his forearm. Vic had designed something more solid, heavier with thicker straps that ran the full length of his arm and joined to a thick shoulder pad, that was then anchored around his chest and to another strap over his opposite shoulder. It was not comfortable, but it was secure. There had been more changes made here and there, a thinner shoulder pad to fit under his shirts, more straps around his bicep, metal rings at the edge of the sleeve to save leather from being hammered straight into it. Vic draped a length of leather over Hook's elbow and marked it in the centre. At his workbench he cut the leather into shape and joined the edges together with a sturdy lace, joining it together.  
"This should give you some more flexibility." He explained, but Hook was not listening. As much as he appreciated Vic and his work, the captain did not like these visits. He did not like being reminded of his 'deficiency', as some people had called it.   
It took hours for Vic to be done with his work, each new seam had been finished perfectly so that they would lay flat and not irritate Hook further. He helped the pirate into the harness, showing off the new clips and buckles, and making sure that the new leather sleeve at his elbow fit exactly right. Hook stretched his right arm out in front of him, bending his elbow and getting a feel for the new way that the leather felt against his body. Vic had been correct, this was easier to move in. Hook pulled both of his elbows back, stretching his back. His left shoulder still ached from the gunshot wounds, and the pain was only exacerbated by the new, thick, strap now covering them. He paid Vic with a small bag of pearls and left the workshop in silence, sure that if he were to open his mouth at all it would only lead to a torrent of pain induced profanity.  
Hook stayed away from the docks, hiding himself close to a set of tall trees. The pain had become near unbearable, no one could see him in such a condition. He crouched down, waiting for the intolerable wave to pass over him, breathing deeply and allowing his limbs to relax temporarily before standing once more and making his mind up to return to his ship. The sun had already started to set when Hook finally reached the docks. Faith sat on a low post there, with Hugo and Mr. Smee. She did not look happy at all, neither did the two men around her. Mr. Smee greeted his captain politely before launching into his complaints.  
"Mr. Yates-" Smee started to say  
"Oh fuck, what does he want now?"  
"Well, he said to tell you…" Mr. Smee paused nervously, "he said, you best keep your little bitch under control or he's done." He emphasised the phrase 'little bitch' and gestured towards Faith.  
"Fuck him." Hook spat, "What happened?"  
"She interfered with his work. Again."  
"She did not interfere." Hugo argued on Faith's behalf. Hook looked at her pointedly, she was the only one he cared to hear the story from.  
"Tell me what happened, my dear." He spoke to her softly, worlds away from the manner he had spoken to her earlier that day. He didn’t like being that kind of man.   
"It was Tootles." Faith told him, "he caught his arm on a nail, pretty big cut but, you know, nothing too nasty. I just cleaned him up and put a bandage on him. No big deal." She shrugged and looked down at her hands. She had been shouted at and admonished enough for one day and hoped that whatever the captain would decide to do with her would be done quickly.  
"Interfering." Mr. Smee said, smugly, "you're not our physician, it's not your place to dispense medical care."  
"What was she supposed to do? Sit by and watch him bleed?" Hugo snapped at the quartermaster, "Yates was below deck getting drunk, he would have been no help. She knew how to handle it and she did.” Hook gestured vaguely with his hand, signalling them all to shut up, grimacing in pain as he did so.  
"You're going to have to punish her, cap'n." Mr. Smee said, ignoring the silence, "I don't know how, just something to keep Yates happy."  
"You want me to punish her for helping the young lad?"  
"If it will keep the peace."  
As kind as Mr. Smee could be, he was also very stuck in his ways. He believed wholeheartedly in doing things for 'the greater good', and as quartermaster it was his job to ensure peace and order amongst the crew. If he had his way he would have made an example of Faith, nothing too harsh, of course. He would have denied her the night's dinner portion or assigned her to clean the goat's pen for the week and that would just have to be enough for Mr. Yates. He wasn't sure what the captain would do, though, Smee could tell that Hook was developing a soft spot for the woman.   
"Tell Yates that I will deal with it when, and only when, my shoulder is healed. I'm in too much pain for this petty bullshit." Hook said, putting an arm protectively around Faith's shoulders and walking with her down to the longboat waiting for them. That evening, Hook sat still and let Faith clean his wounds without making a fuss. He looked up at her, expecting some sort of praise or acknowledgement for having done so, but was left sorely disappointed.  
“You’re not going to kiss it better?” He teased, Faith pursed her lips, she was not in the mood for joking around. However, her disapproving look did not halt Hook’s attempt at gaining her attention. As much as Faith didn’t want to indulge him, when the captain flashed her a smile, she found herself returning one.  
Despite all of the trouble with Yates, despite all of the confusion within her sould, one morning as Faith looked out to yet another island, she found herself thinking that life at sea wasn't all that bad after all. The anchor had been lowered and men were gathering around the longboats to disembark. She hadn't seen the men so eager to get off of the ship before.  
"What's so special about this island?" Faith asked Hook.  
"The waterfall. We can finally bathe properly."  
Cleanliness was important to Hook, it had been drilled into him as a young boy by his mother. Even as a young man, and a member of a far poorer crew, he had washed regularly. Much to the chagrin of his fellow pirates. They had teased him for it, quite terribly, until they saw just how popular young James was with the ladies at port.  
"Be careful with your shoulder." Faith noted, "it's not good if you get stitches too wet."  
"Don't go letting Yates hear you speak like that." Hook said with a boyish grin, "he's still going on about me 'punishing' you."  
"Shit."  
"I shall put it off as long as possible, I don't want to bring you any harm."  
"It's only a matter of time, though. Your shoulder is already so much better."  
Hook sighed deeply, his eyes flashing red momentarily, the entire situation enraged him. The physician enraged him, Hook had never particularly liked the man, but had respected his work and paid him highly. Physicians were not easy to recruit, and he would be a fool to let one go- especially over a woman. But Faith wasn't just a woman to him, he had promised to protect her, he was fascinated by her.   
"Yates can go fuck himself." Hook sneered, the red flashing through his eyes once more.  
Mr. Yates had been checking on his shoulder each day, and each day Hook had lied about how bad it still felt. In Neverland, he always healed quickly, he had survived injuries that would kill a lesser man. Mr. Yates knew this, and had been growing impatient.  
"It was the girl and her interference." He insisted, "females just don't have the aptitude for medicine, if she had stayed out you would be fine by now, Captain." It was the same complaint each day, always followed by a demand for Faith to be punished. He petitioned for the use of a cane or whip, but Hook refused to entertain that idea. At the same time, he had become increasingly afraid that if he did not act soon, then Yates might take things into his own hands.   
Faith moved away from the captain. Something about his manner made her feel uncomfortable. But almost everything made her feel some sort of discomfort. Neverland, pirates, the Jolly Roger, the strange passage of time. Sometimes Faith felt like she had been in Neverland for years and years, other times she felt like she had been there exactly as long as she had been, barely even a few weeks. Then there was Hook, she didn't really know the man at all, yet he had a quality, an aura, that felt so familiar to her. She had been through this cycle of thoughts before, the same things circling her mind almost every day. Who was he really? Could she trust him? She had seen him at his most terrifying. His eyes turning red. The stories had not lied about that. In the cave, she had thought it was the lighting. But she had just seen it happen again. She had once read that his eyes only turned as he took someone's life. A physical manifestation of his inner darkness. Hook hated this about himself, hated that his eyes changed, hated that he hadn't always been this way. The more of a monster people believed him to be, the more of a monster he became. The self hatred often consumed Hook completely, no matter what he could not escape himself. Those very same feelings plagued him as he stood in the pool beneath the waterfall. He closed his eyes, letting the water wash over him, wishing that it would wash away his sins along with the dirt. The crashing of the water, loud enough to hide the approaching footsteps could not drown out his despairing inner monologue. It was always this way, when he was alone he could not escape the truth of who he was, who he had become. He had once been gentle, kind, a man of integrity, but that felt so long ago. Now, he was something else. What he did didn't really matter, he was whatever people thought him to be. Children ran from him, women shied away from him, men feared him. Even those closest to him, those who knew him best, regarded him with fear. As much as he hated it, that was who he was now.  
He heard Faith before he saw her, she had let out a high pitched scream and abruptly started to apologise. She had waited all day for the men to leave the pool area and had thought it would be empty. The sight of Hook's bare back had startled her. Not just because she hadn't been expecting anyone to be there, not even because out of all the men she could have stumbled upon, it had been the captain. More than anything, she had been startled by the raw looking, red welts that had been left from the new leather fittings of his hook. She turned her back immediately, and began to walk away. She could clean herself some other time.  
"Wait." Hook said, "I was just leaving." He made his way to the bank where his clothes had been discarded and pulled them onto his still damp body. He twisted the right sleeve over his incomplete arm, hiding it from view and picked up the heavy hook and harness. Faith was left alone by the pool, and once more she found her thoughts turning to the man who fate had thrust her towards. The image of his back burned into her mind. She knew he must be in pain, even from a distance she could see how sore it looked. Had she been closer she would have also witnessed the weeping and bloody cuts along the welts. She took her time under the waterfall, relishing in each second she could spend getting clean. Warm baths and showers had always been a relief from her day to day life at home, and though the waters here ran cool, the waterfall was as close as she could get to that feeling. After her Bubbe and her cat, Faith missed warm baths the most. Under the waterfall, she thought about all the products she used to use. Thick bubbles, cool gels, scented oils, bath bombs that fizzed for ages before shrinking down to nothing. A scrub that smelled like oranges and left her skin feeling smooth and fresh. The waterfall was nice in its own way, too. Fresh air, calming sounds, the warmth from the sun. A warm bath was relaxing, but the cool waterfall was refreshing, and a brand new experience. Much like a bath, Faith felt like she could stay in the pool, under the waterfall, until her skin wrinkled and then stay a bit longer still. As tempted as she was to stay, Faith couldn't do that, she had no idea when night would come and was sure she would get lost in the dark. It was with a heavy heart that she dried herself off and returned to the beach.  
The sun moved westwards across the sky, casting a warm red glow across the island. It was a pleasant evening, warm but with a mild breeze. Several groups of pirates had decided to camp under the stars. Hook, himself, was sat by a campfire in a small group away from the others. From the tree line where she stood, Faith could make out Hugo talking to the captain, arms gesturing wildly. Mr. Smee was there too, his red cap tilted to the side.   
"I'm not going to cane her." Hook was arguing, Hugo backed him up enthusiastically.  
"She shouldn't be punished at all. It's wrong. She did what any man aboard would do if they had the skills!"  
"Is she really worth letting a good physician go?" Mr. Smee asked. Hook did not want to say no. He also wasn't sure that he could say yes, either. He knew that he did not want to harm Faith. He was certain of it. He was far less certain about what he did want to do with her.  
"There's no one who could truly replace Yates’ skill." He said, defeated, "I could send word to the fleet, but that would take weeks."  
"Captain, no-" Hugo tried to argue  
"You see my point now?" Mr. Smee cut the Frenchman off, smugly, "something must be done."  
"Something, yes." Hook gave in, "but not caning, or whipping. Just let me think."  
Smee nodded, and left his place by the fire to talk with Yates. It was then that Hook looked up and saw Faith. Much like himself, she had chosen not to dress herself fully after bathing. She clutched her stays and outer bodice to her chest, her shift hanging loosely over her breasts and thick petticoats swaying in the breeze. Hook waved her over, and began fumbling with his right sleeve once more, making sure that the arm beneath wouldn't be visible. Faith approached him apprehensively. She had grown suspicious of Mr. Smee, he had petitioned on behalf of the physician so often over the past days that she was sure that he had done so again.  
"I am so sorry." Hook started, "I didn't want it to be this way, but Yates has been threatening to take matters into his own hands."  
"Shit." Faith said with a sigh.  
"I will not use the cane on you, nor shall I use a whip." Hook stopped talking for a moment, looking at Faith, trying to determine her reaction. But she gave him none, "I was thinking that some kind of spanking should satisfy Mr. Yates’ anger."  
"Fuck off."  
Hook scowled, not used to people speaking to him with such insolence in these kinds of situations.  
"I will punish you, only so he won't do something worse."  
"Well doesn't that just fill me with confidence?" Faith asked, sarcastically, "what are you gonna do, then? Bend me over your knee like the bad little girl I am?"  
Hook raised an eyebrow and grinned.  
"As delightful as that sounds, I'm not sure it would be entirely appropriate. You see, a person being punished should not enjoy themselves, but perhaps we may try it some other time?" He teased.  
"Fuck you." Faith spat out  
"Oh, we can do that, too. If you wish." Hook's grin widened briefly, but then his face returned to his usual stern expression, "It’s simple. Hugo shall fetch Mr. Yates, and you will stand, hands pressed against a tree whilst I dispense the punishment." Faith glared at him, lips pressed tightly together, “Oh, don’t look at me like that. I warned you about what Yates was like.” Faith’s expression did not become any softer, in fact, Hook was convinced that if anything it became ever so slightly more hateful and he didn’t like it. She knew that there would be some kind of consequence, knew what kind of man Yates was. And whilst the punishment that had been settled on was demeaning and embarrassing, it was still miles kinder than the alternatives that the physician had presented him with. Better a sore arse than a flayed back, Hook thought. Faith sighed.  
"Just be careful.” She said, Hook raised his eyebrows, “It’s just you could pull a stitch out.” Faith turned her back on him and went to sit by herself. Hook massaged his temple, the whole situation had given him a headache. Mr. Smee in one ear, Hugo arguing in the other, his own morality not knowing what side to take and now he was wracked with guilt. When faced with her punishment, Faith had shown more concern for his comfort than she had her own. Of course she had to make things more difficult for him than they already were. It felt like that was the thing she was best at doing.  
When the time came, Faith stood bravely, her hands pressed against the tree. As brave as she was, she was still afraid. Hook had said that he did not want to harm her and Faith believed him, he had even chosen to use his widest and softest leather belt, knowing that it would cause the least damage to her. But Faith knew that despite Hook's intentions, it would still hurt a great deal. How could it not? Hook was huge and impossibly strong. Her arms shook, as she waited for the first strike as the captain paced behind her.  
"What are you waiting for?" Yates jeered, "get on with it, let that little bitch know her place."  
Hook took a deep breath and raised the belt, but the strike that Faith was expecting did not come. Instead the belt had been dropped at her feet and Hook’s hand had brushed across her arm, telling her she was free to turn around.  
"You've gone soft." Yates sneered, taking a step towards his captain, ready to snatch the belt from the ground and do the job himself. That single step was all that he could take, Hook flew at him, knocking the man down and striking him repeatedly in the face with his right forearm. Yates lay bloody and unconscious beneath him, but Hook did not stop his attack. Faith turned slowly, hearing the commotion. She looked in horror at Hook beating the unconscious Yates.  
"Captain!" She screamed, stopping Hook in an instant. A crowd had gathered, but no man dared approach their captain. They had seen his rages before, and knew from experience to keep their distance. Faith alone dared to walk towards him and placed a soft hand upon his shoulder. Hook looked at the hand, he struck Yates once more before placing his own hand on Faith's and standing up. He began to walk away, and Faith went to follow him.  
"I need to be alone, dearest." He said, "please do not follow me."  
"Will you… will you be okay?" Faith asked, for he did not seem at all okay.  
"I will be fine, you need not worry about me."  
Hook retreated to his quarters, the anger still bubbling beneath his surface. He had promised to protect Faith. Yet he had come so close to being the one to harm her. He had almost lost another part of himself. Mr. Yates had infuriated him, and Mr. Smee had talked him into going along with the physician's demand. In the end, Hook had stayed true to what morals he still held close, but in the process had likely lost his crew their physician. All for a woman that he hardly knew. How had Faith managed to take such a hold on him already? Perhaps, he considered, that she really could be his destruction after all. 


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> On Saturday I lost a beloved pet and dear friend. I don't have much to say about the upcoming part(s) creating things for my Hook has been the only thing that has given me any sense of normalcy these past few days.

In an instant, so much had changed. It was plain to see that something was lurking within the captain's quarters that hadn't been there before. Formless and without shape, it encompassed the room. Indescribable in feeling and inescapable in nature. Hook had become distant, his mind occupied by the recent choices he had made, and his soul consumed with a fear of the unknown. Faith could feel the change within him. He spoke to her less, he didn't invite her to come out to the deck with him. He didn't ask her about what she was reading. He just went about his day, mostly as if she wasn't there, sometimes he would give her a polite 'good morning', but he was often awake and out of his quarters by the time she had woken up. Faith had thought before that this was what she wanted, that she didn't like Hook, that she wished he would just leave her be, and now he was leaving her alone she didn't like it at all. It was there, she realised that despite her protests, despite her determination not to, she absolutely did care about the captain in a way that was deeper than just not wanting him hurt. Usually when Hook had been working until late into the evening, he would return to his quarters to find Faith already asleep. But this night was different, she was still sat on the sofa, book in hand.  
"You're still awake?" Hook said, startled by her presence, "trouble sleeping?" It was the most he had spoken to her in three days. Faith shook her head, "just lost in a good story then?" Hook asked before she could verbally give an answer to his previous query.  
"I uh… I just wanted to talk to you… I guess." She admitted  
"Talk to me? About what?"  
"I don't know." Faith said, looking away. "To thank you… for not… you know. To make sure you're not angry with me."  
Hook was taken aback. He hadn't realised how distant he had been. He had just done what came most naturally to him when his mind was so troubled. Withdrawing from the world had always been far easier than confronting whatever demon that haunted him. He sat next to Faith, looking at her with the intensity that she had come to expect from him.  
"Angry? What would make you think I'm angry with you?" He asked.  
"You've hardly said a word to me since…" she explained, returning Hook's gaze, "hardly even looked my way."  
"I'm not angry," he assured her, "although recently there has been an awful lot on my mind, my beauty."  
Hook often called Faith by some sort of pet name, 'dear' or 'dearest' were most common, and no matter what word he used it almost always came with the notion that she was his. His dear, his dearest. At first Faith had hated it, hated how overtly familiar it felt. Now, in spite of how short a time she had known the pirate, she had become accustomed to it. 'My beauty' though, that was new, and as the words had left Hook's lips Faith's heart felt like it would stop. No one, aside from her grandmother, had ever called her anything close to beauty before. She felt the heat rise to her face, her cheeks flushing pink. Faith tried to hide it, turning her face away, but the small smile on Hook's face told her that it was no use.   
"So," Faith said, trying to regain her composure and think of something to say that would stop them from falling back into uncomfortable silence, "where are we stopping next?"  
"A small island, south of here. There is a tribe we trade with. What's more important is their methods for how they deal with the purging-"  
"Oh, that." Faith had pushed it to the back of her mind. So much had happened that it just didn't feel important.  
"Yes, that." Hook said, "Under their care, you will recover quickly. The chief's daughter will take good care of you, as she has done for many of the men."  
"What? Tiger Lily is going to be my nurse?"  
Hook chuckled at Faith's ignorance.  
"No, my dear. Neverland is home to more than one tribe." His feelings of amusement stopped abruptly, a sudden realisation coming into focus, "but tell me, how is it that you know of Tiger Lily?" He eyed Faith with suspicion, suddenly questioning if she was who she said she was.  
"I… uh… it's in a book." Faith said, "didn't you know?"  
"What book?" Hook questioned, he clearly did not know.  
"It's a children's story book where… no when I'm from.” Faith tried to explain, “it's called 'Peter Pan and Wendy.' It's famous, you're famous."  
Hook wasn't sure what to make of this information, part of him wanted to know more, another part was afraid to ask.  
"This book." He started, "what is it about?"  
Faith took a deep breath, remembering the story fondly. The book had been her absolute favourite ever since her grandmother had given her a beautiful illustrated edition on her fifth birthday. That book had gone everywhere with her. So precious was it to Faith, that even her stepsister didn't dare mess with it. Even in her twenties, Faith kept it with her in a pocket of her messenger bag. She opened and closed her mouth a few times, trying to find the right words to tell the story with.  
"It starts in the nursery room of the Darling children. Wendy loved to tell stories and Peter Pan loved listening to them, you see." She paused and looked at Hook. He nodded and waited for her to continue, "He didn't mean for them to know he was there, but when he lost his shadow he made a bit of noise about it and got quite upset, which woke Wendy up. She helped him, of course. After that he offers to take the children to Neverland. He teaches them to fly. Second star to the right and straight on until morning and all." Faith told the pirate, "They end up having so many adventures in Neverland. They fight with Indians, and pirates."  
"And me." Hook added.  
"And you." Faith confirmed, "Mostly you. In the end Pan kicks you into the jaws of the crocodile, and the children decide to go back home." She finished lamely, not seeing the point in adding anything else to the story.  
"That's it?" Hook asked, "it's all about those Darling brats?"  
"Pretty much." Faith replied. Hook closed his eyes and breathed deeply for a moment. Hearing this had been such a stark reminder of how strange time in Neverland was, and how far away he was from the land he once called home. For the final fight that Faith had just told him about had taken place on the very same, very long night that they had met. The story, otherwise, had not been as interesting as Hook had thought it would have been, but there was still one question he wanted to ask, one thing on his mind, a detail that Faith seemed to have skipped in her short retelling.  
"What does the book say about me, specifically?" He asked, "am I brave? Intelligent? Skilled with a sword?"  
"It's not too complimentary." She told him, "it says that you're cruel, terrible even, you manipulate Wendy and Tinkerbell. It also says the one thing you're frightened of is the sight of your own blood." She paused again, "book says it's some sort of unnatural colour. Yellow seems to be the popular theory."  
Hook laughed, of all the things people had made up about him to make him seem more frightening, more monstrous, this was the most ridiculous.  
"You have seen my blood, my dear, it runs red as any man's." He said, "and whilst I am not afraid of it, nor do I like seeing it shed."   
"Yeah, that makes sense." She said, "don't think anyone likes that." Hook smiled at her, and once again that night her heart stopped. "You know, I used to have nightmares about you when I was a child." She admitted.  
"What about now?" He asked, "Are you still so afraid of me now that you know me? The real me, that is?"  
Faith paused for a second, and looked Hook in the eyes.  
"No, not always." She responded, "But I'm not sure I do know you. Not really." It was strange, because in many ways Faith knew him better than most. It came with the inherent intimacy of living in such close quarters with the man. She knew the sounds of his frustrated huffs when his pen would drop a blob of ink over his logs. She knew the way his hair fell in a mess when he laid down to sleep on the sofa, she knew the struggle he had trying to get a comb through the resulting knots in the morning. She knew how his back troubled him. But she didn't really feel like she knew him. Hook slumped back, what she said was true. She didn't really know him at all. He often thought that Faith was closed off to him, but he had been equally as closed off to her. It had been so long since he had let anyone in that he wasn't even sure he knew how to bridge that gap anymore.   
"Would you like to know me?" He asked.  
Faith didn't answer straight away, the question made her nervous, it was opening the door to a level of intimacy that she hadn't yet experienced. With anyone.  
"Yes, captain. I would like to know you." She replied. Hook smiled warmly, his face pulled crooked by his scar.   
"And I, you." He said, "if you'll allow it."   
The air surrounding them had started to feel different, Faith felt different too. All of her misgivings about Hook were fading away. She had started to see the man as he was, and far less like the villain the stories said he was. Hook could be scary, yes, terrifying even. He could be intimidating, and cruel, too. But not to her. To Faith he had been gentle, patient, kind even. He had chosen to be her protector, willingly taking on that role. Even during the dark moments where he feared that she may be the thing to destroy him, he still held fast to his decision to protect her. He had made that choice. Faith had taken on a role too, one she had stepped into with such ease that she hadn't even realised she had done so. It had been so simple, so natural, so easy. Each choice she made solidified her position even more. She had become the one person who should remain by Hook's side and neither of them knew it. She was the one who had not been afraid to approach him in the heat of his rage, it was her voice and gentle touch that had brought him back from that edge. Faith held Hook's humanity carefully within her, and she was none the wiser to it. He was different when she was around, much more like the man he used to be and far less like the monster that he feared he was. 


	10. Chapter 10

Clear azure skies and smooth sailing ahead. The bright sun bore down upon the ship, covering it in warmth. Even in the shade of the captain's quarters, Faith had shed her outer layer of clothing to gain some comfort. She had been reading a book of Shakespeare's plays that Hook had given to her when he came storming into his quarters, his shirt drenched in spilled rum. He thrust open the wardrobe and snatched a clean shirt from its depths. Faith had just looked up from the pages of her book to greet him, when her gaze met Hook's shirtless torso. Her eyes lingered on the redness around the leather harness.  
"Oh." She squeaked, Hook chuckled and briefly flexed his chest muscles, feeling like he was being quite charming, or at the very least- amusing. Faith shut her eyes tightly, which only served to further amuse Hook.  
"I'm decent." He told her, tucking in the hem of his clean shirt, the ends of his smile still lingering at the corners of his mouth. Faith opened her eyes.  
"Thank God." She said with a roll of her eyes.  
"Come on, I know I'm ugly, but I'm not quite that ugly." Hook pouted, "are you sure there was nothing you liked the look of?" He raised an eyebrow and flashed a teasing grin. Faith just looked at him sternly, "fine." Hook said, "I'm not funny." He sighed and shifted awkwardly. "Come with me, there's something I want to show you." Ever the gentleman, Hook tentatively offered his hand. He was unsure if Faith would find the gesture welcome at all. Although she still felt some discomfort and a great deal of confusion when it came to Hook, Faith did not hesitate in taking his hand. It was his eyes that made her do it. Needy, and yearning. Giving away just how touch starved he was. Faith's small, pale hand fit in Hook's large, tan one perfectly. When he closed his fingers around it, her hand was almost completely hidden from view. He led Faith out of the cabin, and over the deck, stopping ceremoniously at the ship's helm. A huge wheel, practically as tall as she was.   
"You're going to take control." Hook said, waving off the pirate standing before them. Faith took a nervous step away.  
"I can't." She insisted, "I don't know how."  
"You can learn." Hook said, "just put your hands where I show you." He stepped aside, letting her take her place at the helm. Hook stood closely behind her, placing hand and hook on separate spokes. Faith copied him and held on just like he had instructed.  
"What now?" She asked.  
"Hold on tight, and keep the Roger on course."  
Faith nodded, not truly understanding what he meant by 'keeping on course.'She fixed her gaze onto a point in the distant horizon where sea met sky and seemed to join as one. Hook pressed himself firmly against her back. Faith was not yet strong enough to handle the helm alone without such support. He stood so close to her that if she were to stand still enough, and pay close enough attention, she would be able to feel the beating of his heart. Hook looked out across the sea, enjoying the quiet peace that came with being at the helm on days like this. Faith, too, found some peace in her position. She felt safe with Hook so close, no man would approach her. Not even Yates, still so full of anger, would have dared approach her. Not that he could, the Physician had suffered many injuries from his captain's attack and had not been able to leave his cabin since. Hook had not concerned himself with Yates' condition, he had made up his mind to replace the physician as soon as possible, and had Mr. Smee not convinced him otherwise, Yates would have been marooned, too. Instead, the plan had become to make a trade with one of the crews in Hook's fleet. The French captain, Valentine, would take Mr. Yates for his crew, and his own physician, Moreau, would join the Jolly Roger. Hook had met Moreau only a handful of times, but had found the man to be knowledgeable and precise in his work. If he was honest, Hook found the French physician a damn sight more likeable than Yates, too. As skilled as the man was, he would not be missed much amongst the crew. Hook was certain of that.   
The evening inside the captain's quarters was equally as calm as the afternoon at the helm had been. Hook smoked whilst looking over his log books, making notes in the margins as he did. Faith sat in a chair on the opposite side of his desk, still reading Shakespeare and occasionally glancing up at the man in front of her. As Hook worked, he would occasionally mutter to himself, thinking aloud in a language that Faith did not understand.  
"What language is that?" She asked, after Hook had said something that sounded like it could be a swear.  
"Greek." He said, still concentrating on the notes he was making.  
"You speak Greek?"  
"I am Greek." He said, putting his pen down, "well, half Greek."  
Finally Faith was able to place the shadow of an accent that hid in Hook's voice.  
"None of the stories ever mention you being anything other than English." She told him.  
"I imagine that they leave out quite a lot of my past." He said  
"Almost everything."  
Hook leaned back in his chair and took a deep drag of his cigar.  
"Let me tell you the truth, then." Hook raised his cigar to his lips, "I was born," He said, allowing the thick smoke to pour from his mouth, "In the year 1686 on the island of Kefalonia." Faith leaned in, already wanting to hear more of his story. "My mother was an olive farmer, my father, a trader. They never married, making me a bastard. I didn't even meet my father until I was thirteen years old, when he decided that I was to go to Eton. He had arrived on one of his merchant ships in the afternoon, and by the evening I had said goodbye to everything that I knew and held dear. I did not want to leave my home, but I had no say on the matter." Hook didn't often talk about his past, it had been such a very long time ago. Sometimes it felt more like a made up story than it did his own life. He took long breaks whilst speaking, smoking and collecting his thoughts. Faith didn't dare say a word, though. Didn't dare interrupt his process. Hook inhaled from his cigar deeply, then continued to talk about his childhood.  
"My father didn't want me living with him." He said. Instead of going to his father’s, he had been sent to his aunt's home. His aunt lived in a large estate in the country, there had been plenty of space for a young boy to run around and play, but it had not been as pleasing as running through the Greek mountains and coast had been to the young James. "I was a lonely child." Hook explained. "No one wanted to be friends with an illegitimate bastard, nor did they have the time to talk with the boy who struggled with speaking English." He sighed, remembering the boy that he had once been, alone and so far from home. All the days he had spent hidden away in a corner in the library. The hours spent repeating words over and over until he could say them in the same way as his classmates. The lonely boy had grown into an equally lonely man. It seemed that in one way or another, Hook had always been alone. "I did have one friend." Hook said, with a sad smile. "Robert was my aunt’s house slave. He was perhaps a year or so younger than I. At night, after I had been sent to bed, I would sneak out to his room. We would play card games and tell stories about made up worlds. I didn’t understand the trouble he would have been in had we been caught. We never were, though. Then, one morning he was gone. Just gone. I never found out what had happened to him, if he ran away I hope he made it to safety, but…" Hook trailed off, after all the time that had passed, he still held on to so much guilt, blaming himself for all of the things he had not been aware of at the time. "After that, I threw myself into my studies completely. There was nothing else for me." he paused again, sadness moving through his body and swelling within his chest. "I started to excel at school, it just so happened that I had a way with words and language that impressed even my father, when I reached the age of nineteen he pulled me away from my studies at Balliol, and brought me to London to work in his offices. He told me that if I worked hard, then one day I would inherit the entire business." Hook shook his head as he spoke, and stubbed out his cigar. He never wanted to get into trading. At the time he had wanted to be a teacher, but the feeling of finally being wanted by his father had been too strong of a pull. So James Hook had gone to London and worked as a clerk in his father's offices. "He had me work long hours, noting down certain stocks, translating letters between clients, and filing accounts. My father was a secretive man, keeping several facets of his business hidden until I proved myself to him. I was twenty-one when he finally deemed me worthy enough to go to the colonies with him to handle the merchandise head on. From what I've heard, he called it the greatest mistake of his life. Aside from siring me, of course." Hook looked at Faith pointedly, he had never told anyone this part of his story before in such detail. The most he would usually say was that his father was a cruel man who he could not trust, and that he had taken drastic action to put an end to his cruelty. "I will remember that day clearly for as long as I live. Stepping into the ship's hold, I saw that my father did not just trade in spices and silks as he had told me, but also human lives. He had kept it a secret from me, knowing how I had cared for Robert. He had manipulated me. He had once told me that slaves were happy with their lot in life, that they were not like us, they didn't have the capacity that we did to feel, learn, and understand. How had I ever believed him?" Hook held his head in his hand, "What I saw in that ship disgusted me, it was impossible for me to see such suffering and believe that these people did not have the capacity to feel as we feel. Hundreds of bodies all packed into that small, dank space. Of those few who still had the strength, they all called to me in languages I had no ability to translate, but their tones were all the same. Desperate, hopeless, afraid, despairing. Parents crying over their deceased children, whose bodies remained shackled to them. The smell was horrendous. I was sick on the spot, disgusted at the entire thing, disgusted at myself for having been complicit- however unknowingly that was. I made a decision right there to put an end to my father's business." Hook's heart pounded uncomfortably as he told his story, it always did when he thought about that day. His jaw clenched as he tried to steady his nerves before continuing once more. "I waited until the dead of night, after the slaves had been transported to a nearby building, and under the cover of darkness I journeyed to the docks. I burnt every one of his ships, using gunpowder to accelerate the destruction. In the chaos I was able to take my father's keys down to the sheds and helped as many slaves as I could escape their bondage. When I returned to the docks, everything was in disarray." His fingers flexed against the desk, as if they contained every ounce of tension in his body. "I even managed to talk my way onto a Venetian merchant's crew. Thus began my life at sea. It would be almost a decade before I had my first taste piracy. But that, my dear, is a story for another day."  
Faith's hands were clenched and unclenched much like Hook's own, his pain so intense, so palpable, that she felt it as if it were coming from within her own heart. As he spoke of his past she had felt as if she had been right there at his side. She also felt ashamed, Hook had been through things far worse than she ever had and he still stood strong, he still kept going. Despite everything that had happened to him, Hook had done so much with his life, whereas she had managed to accomplish nothing. When the inevitable happened, and he would one day ask about her past, what could she tell him? That she had been sick, and her stepfather and stepsister bullied her. It felt so trivial by comparison. Then she became overcome with guilt, how could she possibly be so self centered to be thinking about herself right now? After Hook had just told her so much about himself, so much about his pain. She wanted to comfort him, but didn't know how. Faith reached across the table cautiously, and let her fingers brush over the back of Hook's hand and then slowly wrapped them around his own. He looked at her, brow furrowed, she had never before instigated any of the small amounts of physical contact that they had shared. Her gentle touch communicated one message.  
"You do not have to be alone."  
Her touch, so delicate, so small, barely even there at all sent waves of emotion crashing towards Hook. Things he had not felt in a very long time. His heart beat so fast that he thought it might give out on him. There were multiple events in his past, that when thought on would always cause his pulse to quicken and send him into a state of panic, but this was something new. A new layer added upon his familiar discomfort. The fear that he might have opened himself up too much, given too much of himself away. Without even knowing it, he had given Faith the key that could open every door within the corridors of his soul, and she now had the power to know him completely. Hook hadn't planned on this, hadn't thought it possible, he had just stumbled blindly onwards down one of the paths that had appeared before him the night that they had found each other. The thought of being known so deeply was terrifying to him. The last person who he had tried to let in had left him a broken man. Few things scared him quite as much as going back to that place he had once been in. He had purposely kept the world at a distance to protect himself. But Faith, she had been like water seeping through a crack in his walls, and no matter how much Hook feared that closeness, he had no way to stop it either. She lived with him, shared his private space, and he had enabled all of it. Not just enabled it, the voice at the back of his mind said, sought it out. He had been the one to come to her each day to talk, he had been the one to offer his hand over and over. And now he had offered himself and she had accepted. 


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QeoXo2GorkI

Bright sun and white sands, the island was picturesque. Faith could imagine seeing it appear in one of the travel books she used to read at the library. People paid thousands to step foot on a place like this, and she was getting to see it for free. Men unloaded heavy barrels and crates onto the beach, chatting away with the locals as they did.  
"We trade with this tribe." Hook told Faith, "we give them fabrics, metals, and rum. In return we get grains, rice, sometimes a goat or two." But Faith showed no interest in what he had said, although she was not afraid of the coming 'purging', she had some level of anxiety about it. Hook had assured her of the skills of the woman who would be helping her through it, but Faith felt uneasy about a complete stranger seeing her in such a way. She had been so nervous that she hadn't mentioned her encroaching symptoms, her temperature had been increasing steadily since the morning. Faith was sure that a doctor would have said she was feverish and ordered her to take plenty of fluids and rest. She stood still, breathing slowly and trying to find some comfort in the heat. Hook began to walk across the beach towards some of the bamboo buildings by the treeline. Faith tried to keep up, but it was so hard. Her head spun, and her body weak.  
"Captain-" she called out after him. Hook stopped immediately and turned around. He didn't like the way she sounded, "I don't… I think…" she didn't finish her sentence, even talking made her head hurt. Hook rushed to her side and looked into her eyes, the eyes always gave it away when someone was purging. Glassy and unfocused, almost corpse like. He lifted Faith into his arms, and carried her across the island. He spoke to her the whole way, encouraging her to stay awake. By the time that Faith had been set down in the fabric tent, the pain had set in. Pain so pure and so intense that it blot every other sensation out of existence. A burning white light broken up by small moments of clarity. Her carer, her nurse, her guardian angel had administered a mixture of fungus and tree sap to sedate and relax her. In this sedated state, Faith dreamed that she was home again. She dreamed of her grandmother's dinner served on a Friday night, her cat curled up by her side whilst she read a book, her favourite seat by the window in the library, all things that brought her comfort. A strong hand wrapped around her own, a smile that made her heart stop, a scarred face and a beating heart. On the seventh day, the pain eased and clarity returned to Faith's mind. She was naked and covered by a light cotton sheet, a damp cloth placed across her chest.  
"Shit." She groaned, slowly sitting up.  
"You're awake!" A nearby woman said, rushing over. Faith blinked a few times, trying to make her eyes focus fully. The topless woman crouched before Faith and placed a hand upon her forehead, "you're still warm." She said with a sigh.  
"I'll be fine." Faith insisted.  
"Yes. You will be." The woman sat on the ground nearby and poured a cup of water and handed it to Faith, "I'm Tahi." She introduced herself with a kind smile that made her deep brown eyes light up.  
"Faith."  
"I know, your captain told me."  
Faith continued sipping at the water, Tahi kept her cup full, occasionally adding a few drops of honey.  
"It helps you recover." She said, stirring the honey, "gives you energy." Faith found the honey to be quite sickly tasting, but thanked Tahi and drank the mixture anyway, the whole time being careful to keep her body covered. Tahi eyed her with confusion. She had never before met someone so desperate to stay covered up.  
"You are ashamed of your body." She stated, "does your captain not make you feel beautiful?" Faith almost choked upon the water upon hearing her question. Hook had one time called her 'beauty', his beauty, and it had made her feel some sort of way, but he almost always called her by some type of pet name. Faith had been sure that 'beauty' didn't mean a thing.  
"I… uh, why would he?" She asked back  
"You are his woman, no?"  
Faith shook her head.  
"No. I am not his woman."  
"But he brought you here, he made his whole crew stop on this island to wait for you, he paid me more than he has ever paid me before, surely-"  
"It's not like that. He has this sort of sense of obligation to me because of this." Faith extended her right palm and showed Tahi the scar that connected her to Neverland, and to Hook. Tahi crawled closer and ran her finger over it. She had been in Neverland long enough to recognise such magic, and was fascinated by it. Magic had given her people many gifts, but it had also taken so much away. Tahi's family had not grown in decades, pregnancy and childbirth had become so rare amongst her people. Tahi missed having children around, she missed the playing and the laughter, her heart yearned to take care of the babies once more. But there were no more babies, there were no more children. They all grew up, like all children must, and were now living in a state of adult agelessness. Tahi had tried to find a way around this, tried to find a way to change her people's fate, but the only answer she could find was 'magic'.   
Faith drew her hand away, not entirely comfortable with the way Tahi was observing it.  
"Grace told me it meant that me and him, we're connected in some way. I don't know." Faith shrugged, hoping this explanation would satiate the hungry look in Tahi's eyes.  
"You share such a connection, yet you still deny that you are his woman."  
"I'm not." Faith insisted, "anyway, a man like that would never choose a woman like me." Tahi tilted her head, she didn't quite understand.  
"Why would he not choose you?" She asked, unaware of just how uncomfortable this question was. Tahi often asked uncomfortable questions without realising it.   
"I mean, look at me. I'm not exactly attractive."  
"That's not true at all." Tahi said, her voice raising slightly, "among my people you would be an exceptional beauty."  
"Well, where I'm from… I'm a moped. Fun to ride, but you don't want anyone to know about it." Faith repeated the same crude joke she had heard many times in her life, shrugging as she did so. Tahi did not know what a moped was, but understood the concept of what Faith had said. She didn't like it.  
"If that is so, maybe you should stay here, with us. No one would make you feel that way again." Tahi had made such offers to every strange woman who had come across the island. Every time in the hope that this woman would be the one to bring new life to her people. It had yet to happen, but the magic she had witnessed around Faith gave her hope for a different outcome. Faith lowered her gaze, thinking of Hook. She didn't know if she could really just leave him.  
"What about Hook?" She wondered aloud.  
"If his kindness is only out of obligation, then he should let you stay. You would be safe here. Happy, too." Faith thought about it. It could be nice to live on dry land again, and if she were to stay behind it would mean that Hook wouldn't have to replace Yates anymore. She wouldn't be around to cause him any trouble. Trouble, she felt, was the defining thing she had been to Hook and his crew. Her skills weren't all that useful to them, and she had made their physician furious. Hook hadn't even wanted her in the first place. She was sure he would be glad to see the last of her.  
"I guess, I'll have to talk to him." Faith said, "make sure he's okay with it." Tahi's face lit up.  
"That means you would like to stay?" She asked.  
"I think so, yeah."  
"Then later, after the events, I shall have to introduce you to my brother. I think that he will like you." Tahi winked playfully, she loved her brother dearly and had always hoped to see him married with a family of his own, but despite her efforts to play matchmaker for him, no woman had kept his attention for too long. She thought that perhaps Faith, with her strange and unfamiliar magic, could be the one to change that. Faith grinned and returned to sipping from the cup whilst Tahi talked excitedly about the night's coming events. It had become tradition to hold a celebration on the last night of the pirate crew's stay. There would be drinking, dancing, music, and the 'trials'. Feats of strength, all culminating in 'the race', "my brother Malohi, almost always wins." Tahi announced proudly, "come, we need to get you ready." She quickly took one of the long and brightly coloured strips of fabric from the tent and motioned for Faith to stand up. Tahi wrapped the length of fabric around Faith's waist and tying it into a skirt, covering the tattoos that Grace had given her completely. She then took down large garlands of leaves and bright flowers, draping them around Faith's neck and over her chest.  
"So you feel covered." She said, giving Faith a reassuring smile.  
Faith's clothes, the ones that Hook had given her, had been folded into a neat parcel and wrapped in another bright length of fabric and taken across the island where it had been put aside with the remaining items still waiting to be taken back to the ship. Tahi had kept close to Faith, not letting her out of sight for a moment and showing her around the island. They eventually stopped close to a circle that had been drawn in the sand.  
"Everyone loves the race." Tahi said, "but I much prefer the fights."  
Faith nodded along with her explanations, but wasn't really listening. All she could pay attention to was the small group of men standing in the distance near the water. She hardly even noticed the fighting going on just feet in front of her eyes.  
"Who's he talking to?" Faith asked  
"The captain? Oh, the older man is my father, next to him is my uncle, and the one who just left- that's my brother."  
"They've been talking so long."   
"My father is in your captain's pockets," Tahi said, rolling her eyes, "they always have lengthy talks about 'business'."  
"Oh."  
Faith drew her eyes away from Hook and started to relax, the fights were exhilarating and soon she found herself cheering along with the rest of those watching. Of all those present, Tahi was the most excited, shouting, clapping, and eventually screeching with joy.  
"Look! Look! Malohi is going to fight!" She shouted in Faith's ear, grabbing her thigh excitedly. Up close, Faith could see that Malohi was very handsome. He had long, and thick, dark hair that hung down his back, and the same magical looking brown eyes that his sister had.  
"Who is he gonna fight?" Faith asked. Before Tahi could answer there was a thud in the sand and a recognisable voice.  
"The chief." Hook said, leaning closer to Faith, speaking softly into her ear.  
"What are you doing here?" Faith asked, "thought you would have business to do." Hook chuckled.  
"I came to see the fight, of course. But I am afraid to say that I might be distracted." Hook told her. Faith narrowed her eyes, unsure of his meaning, until he spoke again, a small smile appearing across his face. "Island life really does suit you, my dear." He placed the outer edge of his hook delicately at the nape of Faith's neck, examining the garlands that had been laid there. She exhaled sharply through her nostrils, suddenly feeling more exposed and vulnerable than she ever had around him. Even if he was just teasing her again, the way he had spoke, the tone of his voice, had made her feel as if he could perhaps be giving her an honest compliment. Faith, not knowing how best to react, turned her attention to the fight. Everyone watching appeared excited. The chief had never before stood against his son. It was over almost as quickly as it had started, and gone exactly as most of the tribespeople had expected. Malohi swooping in strong and fast, trying to grapple his father, but the chief had the experience to deflect him easily and with a simple flowing action had thrown his son off balance and laid him out in the sand. The crowd sitting around dispersed and Tahi ran off towards her brother and father, leaving Faith alone with Hook. The pirate stood up and offered his hand, wordlessly asking her to walk with him.   
If the island was beautiful by day, then by night it was awe inspiring. Clear skies full of stars, the sweet sounds of the ocean waves playing their songs for all to hear. If someone were to wash up on this island that night, they would surely believe themselves to have found heaven. If there was any place that true love or love at first sight existed, it was this island. But Faith did not believe in these concepts, she hadn't for a long time. True love and love at first sight were little more than childhood fantasies to her, something that could never really happen. Not to somebody like her. She walked slowly, trying to think of a way to talk to Hook about the prospect of staying behind on the island, but nothing felt right.  
"You seem troubled, my dear. " Hook said, stopping in his tracks.  
"I guess I am." She told him.  
"Is there something I can do about it?"  
"Well…" Faith started, "it's just, earlier Tahi said something, and I think it makes sense, I think-"  
"You wish to stay here, with her, don't you?" Hook interrupted.  
"How did you know?"  
"Tonight at the fights you seemed so at ease, so happy, so free. I don't think I've ever seen you that way before."  
"So, you're okay with it?"  
"If it will make you happy, then it is, of course, okay with me." Hook took a small step backwards, he never thought it would end quite this way. Faith grabbed his hand in both of her own and thanked him with a smile. "Just one thing, dearest." Hook said, trying to return that smile, "if tonight is to be our last night together, I intend to make it memorable, please come watch me win the race."  
"So sure you're going to win? Arrogant much?"  
Hook chuckled, he didn't mind her teasing, and if Faith was honest with herself she didn't mind when he teased her, either. A certain level of comfort had been built between them. Faith was no longer afraid of him in the slightest, and Hook could tell. He liked it. He liked that she was honest with him, he liked the way she would tell him about the books she had read, he liked the insight he got into the way her mind worked as she spoke of her thoughts and opinions. He liked her. Hook liked having Faith around. Grace had been right in her assertion that the young woman would be good for the old pirate. Hook had just come to see that truth, and now it was almost time to say goodbye.  
Torches set into the sand illuminated the race 'track', at one end sat a row of nine boulders. This race was not just one of speed, but of strength too. Faith stood with Tahi, watching the competitors prepare. Tahi pointed out her brother once more.  
"He's going to win. I know it." She said, almost bouncing with excitement.  
"You sound as sure about that as Hook did when he told me that he would win the race." Faith said, grinning and turning her gaze to the captain. Tahi laughed.  
"Men really cannot help but show off for one another. Or perhaps he is hoping to win you back."  
"No." Faith brushed off the idea, "he wouldn't…" her sentence trailed off, distracted by Hook standing by a boulder. He had removed his shirt, and then raised his hand to the metal clasp by his shoulder. The harness fell away from his body and the heavy sleeve landed at his feet. Finally Faith had seen him. All of him. The incomplete arm that he so often tried to hide, stretched out in front of him. She had never seen his right arm before, the scarring was as bad as she had heard from the other pirates, but she was not put off by the sight of it. It did not disgust her as Hook had feared it would. He turned, and for a moment, looked towards Faith. As he did, she averted her gaze. She didn't want him to think she had been staring at him. In the few short weeks that Faith had spent with the man, she had learnt that he did not like people looking at his arm.   
A huge man blew through a conch shell, signalling the start of the race. Faith's eyes did not leave Hook at all. Not for a second, not as he heaved the jagged and heavy boulder over his left shoulder, nor as he struggled to carry it faster than the other men down the straight track. It was only when he had thrown the boulder down, past the finishing line and lay himself beside it in the sand that she turned away.  
"He really did it." Faith said, looking at Tahi, "he won." Tahi remained quiet, disappointed that her brother had come in second. Faith rushed across the sand to where Hook lay, chest heaving as he recovered from the trial. As Faith knelt next to him, she saw all of the cuts and scratches across his shoulder.  
"Captain! You're bleeding!" She said, shocked. Hook sat up and looked down to his shoulder, and shrugged.  
"All part of the trial, my dear." He told her, "only the sharpest bastards of boulders are chosen for it."  
"Tahi was right… men really can't help showing off for each other. It's okay, I'll clean these cuts when we get back to…" her sentence trailed off. She wouldn't be going back to the ship with him. Hook looked at Faith pointedly and shifted onto his knees, mirroring the position that she had sat herself in.  
"I can assure you that there was only one person I was showing off for."  
"Trying to win me back, eh?" Faith asked, trying to crack a joke to break through the solemn air that had grown thick between them.  
"Did it work?" Hook raised an eyebrow, he too tried to joke, tried to tease, but the words did not leave his mouth with his intended tone.  
"I- uh… I don't know." Faith admitted. There was a part of her that wanted to go back with him, to remain by his side. There was also the part of her that wanted the sort of life that Tahi had promised. To be seen as beautiful, to be desired. Something she had never had before.  
"You could find happiness at sea, yet." Hook said, leaning closer to her.  
"It's just-" Faith started to speak, feeling more vulnerable than she ever had, "Tahi said that here, among her people, I'm beautiful, that I would be wanted, you know?" Hook's chest ached and his mind raced. How could the woman knelt before him feel that way? He already thought her to be beautiful, and in that instant he wanted nothing more than he wanted her. He thought that perhaps, like Grace she was a witch who had cast a spell over him, but what he felt was nothing like what he had felt when Grace and her mystical ways had been turned towards him.  
"But you are beautiful." Hook said. Faith shook her head.  
"It's more than that." She tried to explain, "I want to love. I want to be loved."   
"And you think staying here gives you your best chance." Hook guessed correctly, reading her expression as easily as he read any book. Faith nodded. "Well, this must be farewell." He moved slightly, fully intending to stand and walk away. Hook could tell that Faith's mind had been made up and there was little he could do to change it. But as he moved, Faith's hand wrapped around his fingers, she wasn't quite ready to say goodbye yet.  
"James." She said, softly speaking his name for the first time, "I will miss you."   
"Oh, I'll be back soon enough." He said, "I bet, when I return for the next trade you shall be happy with a strong and handsome husband, and you will hardly remember that old 'Captain Hook' at all." He had tried to be comforting, but the tears appearing in Faith's eyes told him that he hadn't succeeded in that. As she went to dab at the corners of her eyes, he took her hand firmly in his own. "But, if you ever want to, ever need to, I know that you will find me once more." He brought her fingers to his lips, holding them there for a second, indulging in the sensation of her skin against his own and then flipped her hand and kissed the scar that connected them. He then dropped her hand and made a strange and sudden movement, closing the gap between them even more. For the shortest of moments, even air would have struggled to pass between them. Faith thought briefly that Hook might have been about to kiss her, all of her breath got stuck within her throat, but no kiss came. Hook just smiled sadly and pulled away, "Now go live your life, be happy." He said.  
Faith returned to Tahi, eyes still threatening to let her tears fall loose. Tahi placed a hand upon her shoulder, leading her away from the continuing events, behind the houses where the farmlands were.  
"You do care about him." She said in an almost accusatory tone.  
"Well...I...uh…" Faith stuttered, "I guess I do." She admitted. Tahi pursed her lips together and leaned in towards Faith.  
"Captain Hook is not a good man." She whispered in Faith's ear, as if there might be someone listening in on what she was saying, "he is darkness, he is evil, you need to leave him behind. Forget about him." Faith's heart dropped upon hearing this, she didn't quite believe it, she didn't want to believe it.  
"No." She argued, "he's not like that."  
"You just have not known him long enough to see the darkness within him." Tahi pleaded with her, trying to make Faith see sense in the matter. But it wasn't working.   
"And I suppose that you have seen that darkness?" Try as she might, Faith couldn't stop herself from raising her voice. Her heart ached for the man. She knew he wasn't the person Tahi insisted that he was. She knew that he didn't like being seen in that light, either. It didn't matter though, Faith could tell that Tahi didn't want to hear any different.  
"Only evil could do what he did." Tahi snapped.  
"What did he do?" Faith paced back and forth in front of the goats pen, waiting for some kind of explanation.   
"Children." Tahi said, at last, "he killed children. Papa asked him for help when Peter Pan was near. I saw him walk into the forest, I heard the fighting, I saw him leave. He was covered in blood.” She paused, whole body shaking, “I saw the bodies too."  
"The lost boys." Faith said.  
"He said there was no saving them, but they were just children!" She cried, "how could he have done such a thing?" Tears flowed freely down Tahi's cheeks at the memory of the small bodies she had helped bury. Hook had ensured that Peter Pan would leave the tribe alone, but the cost had been the loss of so many lives. The cost had been too high for Tahi, she had not trusted Hook since. Faith did not reply, there was nothing she could possibly say in that situation. Tahi's story had not changed her mind at all. Faith was not sure of many things when it came to the fearsome pirate, but a single truth burned bright within her, she knew within her heart that of all the things that Captain Hook may be, evil was not one of them. Yet as sure as Faith was about his goodness, Tahi remained just as sure of his evil.   
Faith did not return to the celebration, instead she stayed by the farmlands, feeling more torn than she had when parting ways with Hook. She wandered through the rows of corn long through the night, only returning to the beach when she could no longer hear the sounds of distant chatter and laughter. The beach was quiet now, peaceful, Faith sat digging her feet into the sand looking out to the moonlit horizon where the Jolly Roger floated still. The pirates would leave at sunrise, if she so desired Faith could reach the ship before that time. She could swim, call out to the captain, her captain, and be pulled back aboard. There was so much that she could do, so many options, but Faith didn't know what action to take. Her fear, her confusion poured out of her, freezing everything around her.  
"Another night owl, huh?" A warm voice melted through the ice, distracting Faith from the troubles stagnating in her mind. She turned to the man, looking him up and down. Malohi was definitely a very attractive man. He sat himself next to her and smiled.  
"I always liked looking at the moon." Faith said, looking away from him.  
"Well we have that in common. Little sister will be pleased to hear it." He sighed, "although I should tell you, I'm not looking to get married."  
"Neither am I." Faith said  
"Another thing we have in common. Maybe little sister is a decent matchmaker after all!" Malohi began to laugh. Faith gave a polite giggle, but she didn't find the situation at all funny. Her thoughts remained focused on the ship and one particular man upon it. Malohi continued to make polite conversation, hardly realising he was mostly talking to himself.  
"Do you think he's evil?" Faith asked, "Hook, I mean." Malohi stopped suddenly.  
"I think the captain is a complicated man. He's helped our people many a time, I've also heard many a story about his misdeeds. I'm not sure I could call him evil, though."  
"Tahi seems to think he's some kind of devil or something."  
"What do you think?" Malohi pried.  
"I don't know anymore." Faith looked back up at the moon and the stars, "everything is just so bloody complicated."  
"If you'd like, I could help take your mind off of things." He offered, "I find a good drink does wonders for the soul."  
Malohi's cabin was one of the larger ones in the tribe, he was very proud of this, it meant that he would one day take over as chief. Faith was unimpressed with this display of power. He kept his alcohol in a chest that he had traded with Hook's crew for. He liked to drink, and often spent his evenings on the front steps sharing a bottle or two with his friends. Faith drank deeply, straight from the bottle, hoping that the sweet liquid would erase every confusing feeling from her mind. She was still sure that she had made the right choice, she was sure that she could find a life that she wanted far more easily here than at sea. As she drank, Faith began to relax and enjoy Malohi's company. They talked and laughed for hours, and for two people with such vastly different backgrounds, they got on easily. The pair had been laughing over a joke that they were too drunk to even remember when Malohi leaned in.  
"What are you doing?" Faith asked  
"Helping you take your mind off of your captain." He said, "if that is still what you want." Faith nodded and accepted his advance. Malohi's kisses were strong, rough, and with the clumsiness expected of someone who was very drunk. Then Faith was on her back, her skirt pushed upwards, and accepting him into her. The night did not end in an earth shattering climax, but it left Faith feeling satisfied enough that she could forget her troubles for the brief passage of time it took for her to roll onto her side and fall asleep.  
When she awoke the next morning, the Jolly Roger was long gone, there was no turning back or changing her mind now. Now there was a small pain that lived within Faith's heart, grieving the life she had just lost. There was nothing else for her to do but return to the arms of a man she didn't love. The start of a new life once more.


	12. Chapter 12

Life on the island was unlike the life she had led before Neverland, yet there remained a certain monotony to it that felt familiar. Once the tribe had assigned her a small bamboo hut close to the sea, Faith's daily routine rarely changed. Every morning she would tie on a skirt and rush outside to gaze into the horizon, looking for sails but not quite understanding why it had become so important for her to do so. Every day she would hope to see something at the horizon, every day she was disappointed. After her morning ritual, Faith would go to collect water and begin cooking the day's food. In the afternoon she would head to the farms to tend to the livestock with Tahi, and at night she would return to Malohi. There was no love with him, just desire and meaningless fucking that kept Faith distracted from her thoughts and the troubles eating away at the back of her mind.   
It was three weeks to the day after first arriving on the island that Faith finally met Tahi and Malohi's half sister. She had been on a long hunting trip to another island and had returned overnight. Like every other morning, Faith was standing in the shallow water looking out to the horizon, the sun warm against her skin. She had been so entranced by the sunrise that she had hardly heard the woman calling out to her.  
"Hey! Hey! You need to move! Quick!" She called out. Faith startled and turned around, looking at the woman waving from the sand. "Rip tide!"  
Faith had never seen a rip before, but she knew they were dangerous. She moved quickly and carefully towards the sand and the woman. Faith could see the family resemblance in an instant, but unlike her half siblings Alex had deep red hair and bright green eyes. She shared a mother with the chief's children, but her father had been a pirate. Alex had never met him, all she really knew about him was that she wore his choice of name. Faith had people in the tribe speak of her often, and had been looking forward to meeting this fierce fighter and celebrated hunter. She had been told that Alex was intelligent, funny, remarkably kind, and quite pretty too. Upon laying eyes on her, Faith could see exactly why so many young men's hearts laid broken in her wake. Alex was a beautiful woman, and seemed to radiate positivity.   
"Gods! What were you doing out there?" Alex asked  
"Just having a look…" Faith muttered, unable to explain what she was hoping to see.  
"Looking at what?"  
"I thought I saw sails." She lied, unconvincingly. Alex was able to see straight through the falsehood. Being able to read people was one of her many talents. So good was she at this, that those closest to her would swear that it was a gift bestowed upon her by the land they inhabited.  
"Oh, that's right!" She said with a knowing smile, "you're Hook's woman. He's not due back here for at least another six moons. Probably longer."  
Faith tried to work out how long that would be. She had been paying close attention to the strange way time passed in Neverland, the tribe marked the passage of time by the appearance of a full moon. Each night Faith would try to observe the sky, but it made little sense to her. There was a method to predicting the changing months and seasons in Neverland, but Faith had not experienced enough time in the land to understand it's nuances. Time did not make sense here. Some nights, much like the night when Faith had first washed up on Neverland's shores, seemed to go on forever. Others barely lasted long enough to get a decent sleep in. Daylight hours could pass just as erratically, a single afternoon could take a whole day to pass. On these long days and nights, the tribe would gather around a bonfire and give thanks to the world around them for what it had provided. This was often followed by drinking and a large meal. Faith had yet to experience this, she had been lucky enough to have lived through a time where days and nights lasted as long as she would expect them to. More or less.   
Six moons. Probably more. Faith thought on these words quietly. A long time, she thought. It had to be. There was a sinking feeling within her stomach. Six moons. Then she might see her captain again. But would he want to see her? Faith wasn't so sure. He had been kind to her, but she had convinced herself that was only out of obligation. She had often read the phrase "absence makes the heart grow fonder" in her books, however she felt that "out of sight, out of mind" would be more applicable in her case. Sensing that something troubling had crossed Faith's mind, Alex tried to fill the quiet pause with more conversation.  
"I think we have a long day coming soon." She said, looking out towards the horizon.  
"How can you tell?" Faith asked.  
"The animals." Alex sat down and gestured for Faith to sit with her, "they act differently before it happens. Preparing, I suppose. Like they do for seasons. For daylight, they're slower, less active, they don't need to do so much when there will be so much extra time soon. When the long nights approach they act much the same as when the cold is coming." She explained, happy to talk as much as she thought Faith needed to take her mind away from the creeping melancholy.  
"My first night in Neverland was long." Faith sighed, "I didn't understand what was happening."  
"The first one is always the worst. That's what I've been told.” Alex nodded certainly, “But I've never known time anywhere else. I was born here." Faith's eyes widened slightly. She knew from having seen Neverland and what it was really like, that there must have been people born in the place, yet it hadn't felt real. But knowing something and seeing proof of a thing are sometimes very different experiences. She was fascinated by the very concept of growing up in such a place.  
"What was it like?" Faith asked, "Being a child here? Did you ever run into Peter Pan?"  
Alex recoiled at the sound of Pan's name. She had never seen the boy, but the stories she had been told had terrified her. Even as she sat there, a grown woman of around twenty-two years old, she feared him. She had faced wolves, bears, venomous snakes, and even sharks. None of them scared her as much as Peter Pan did.  
"I was mostly treated well by the tribe." She said, "babies and children are so rare here, we treat them like the miracles they are." As nice as being treated like a miracle sounded, Alex's early years were not all happy. At barely a week old, her birth mother had been taken away from her by an infection. Then the chief had been so furious that he had executed the pirate he suspected of being her father. "I had a long childhood, long even by Neverland's standards." She continued, "The chief didn't allow me to live with his family, so a hunter and his wife took me in, they raised me as their own, they are my parents as far as I'm concerned. They had a child, too- although she was much older than me." She smiled, thinking of her older sister, and the many happy times that they had shared whilst growing up. "We played every day, and I learned how to fish and how to hunt. It was a good childhood. Every night, though, they would tell me the same thing. Never go out into the forest alone, if you hear the sounds of a fairy's bells you must hide, if they find you Peter Pan will take you away." Alex stopped talking for a moment to look at Faith, "our tribe is no friend to Peter Pan, before I was born he came here and stole four of our own. He came back again when I was young. Hook helped us. I remember hiding under the house with my sister, her hand pressed over my mouth so that I couldn't make a noise. Hook went into the forest that night, screams filled our island, but when he returned we knew that Pan would not come back again."  
"He killed the lost boys." Faith said, "Tahi told me about that night. She thinks he's evil for having killed them."  
"If he had not killed them, then Pan would have kept coming back to take what few children we had." Alex said with a sigh, "but Tahi cannot forgive the shedding of any child's blood. Children really are a miracle here, and to hurt one… she thinks that there must have been more that could have been done to save them. Some kind of magic that could have brought them back. I'm not sure though." Alex stood up and stretched her arms above her head. She had some work to do, curing meat with salt and smoking fish. Faith joined her and helped with the work, only leaving when it was time to tend to the animals in the farmlands. She spent the afternoon considering Alex and her past. She felt uneasy with the way The chief and his family had been described. It was clear that Alex did not view the family in a positive light at all.  
When the long day that Alex had anticipated came, Faith went through the motions of her routine like usual. But instead of going to Malohi once everything had been done, she returned to her spot on the beach where she watched the horizon. She wondered about what the pirates would do on such a day. She could see Hook having them stop off at an island to clean the hull of barnacles and debris, he would certainly make some sort of productive use out of the extended daylight hours. Hugo would want to take the goats to graze on real grass for a change, there was always some sort of work to be done on the ship.  
"You miss him, huh?" Alex had spotted Faith and decided to come join her.  
"No. I don't know." Faith said, "maybe, kind of. Yes." She finally admitted  
"Do you mind if I asked why you chose to leave him?"  
"Tahi." Faith said, "she said a lot of things, but she made it sound like I could have a happy life here, have the things I've always wanted. That I might even find love." She forced out an awkward laugh, trying not to sound too depressing, "Lord, I sound pathetic, don't I? Pathetic and desperate."  
All colour drained from Alex's face.  
"I think you ought to try to get back to Hook." She said, "there's something going on here, you'd be better off with him. Trust me."  
"What?" Faith was confused.  
"Tahi is, well, I think her heart is probably in the right place but… she's just so desperate for our tribe to have children."  
"I don't understand." Faith was utterly confused.  
"She told you those things to coerce you into getting pregnant." Alex said, "I think." She tried to soften the blow.  
"Is Malohi-"  
"In on it? No. The chief on the other hand… he might be."  
"Are you sure? Tahi is my friend, she wouldn't do that, would she?"  
"I don't know, I heard some rumours, didn't hear the details. But I know Tahi, she is desperate for the tribe to have new children. That's a fact. Just, be careful, okay?" Alex looked nervously over her shoulder, this was not a conversation she wanted to be caught having. With the daylight hours being so long, it would be hard to sneak away unnoticed to talk somewhere private too. All she could do for now was to make sure Faith was cautious in her actions and didn’t get into too much trouble.  
The celebrations and rituals dedicated to the long day went on and on, lasting well past the time when the sun had started to set. Faith found little joy in them, disturbed by what Alex had said. She could hardly believe it. Still, that night, she did not visit Malohi and instead slept on her own straw mat on the floor of her own small cabin. Her dreams were haunted by the night's she had spent with him and what it could mean for her future if Alex was proven correct. Faith did not sleep easily, waking up many times. She found herself yearning for the pirate she had left behind. Hook would have been able to shine a light on her situation, she knew it. He probably would have warned her against sleeping with the chief's son again, too. If he was here, if he had heard the rumours that Alex had, he would protect her. Faith knew this, Hook had protected her since they had left Grace's home in the forest. Faith wished that she had his protection now. She was unsure if there were enemies hidden in the shadows around her, it was all just rumours after all, but she felt unsafe in the knowledge that something had created those rumours in the first place. She thought that they might have come from Malohi, he often complained that his father wanted him to find a wife, he also mentioned how Tahi thought herself to be his matchmaker. Malohi didn't want to be married, and he was quite vocal about it. His complaints about his father and sister could have easily been misconstrued to be something more sinister. When Faith finally drifted off to a sleep that remained undisturbed, her dreaming turned to Hook, but it didn't feel like dreams should, there was something more tangible to this image than that. She felt like if she could just reach out far enough, then she could take his hand and pull him to her. But she couldn't do that, she was but a ghost in this image. Helplessly watching him alone in his quarters.  
It was late in the afternoon when Faith finally awoke. Tahi was standing above her, smiling broadly.  
"Someone had a bit too much to drink last night." She said in a sing-song voice.  
"I didn't touch a single drop." Faith protested, wiping the sleep from her eyes, "I just had a hard time getting to sleep." Faith pulled the blanket tightly around her body.   
"Come on, get up!" Tahi pleaded, "we're going fishing."  
"Fishing?"  
"Alex asked after you for this trip, and I decided to come too… it's been so long since… well, you'll see!" As always, Tahi seemed over excited and bounding in energy. An overwhelming presence to be around so soon after waking up. Faith groaned, she was still so tired and had hoped she would be able to sleep some more. After a quick meal of a porridge-like food and fruit, Faith put on a clean skirt and hurried to meet Alex and the rest of the small fishing party. Five people in total would be going on the trip. Alex stood talking to two men whilst Tahi sat in the shade, bored.  
"It's a bit of a walk and then we take two boats to the small island with the wide river." She said as Faith sat beside her.  
"Why go to another island?" Faith asked, "there's water everywhere here…"  
Tahi shrugged, she did not know the answer. Although Tahi had many talents, she had never been much of a hunter or fisher. She always enjoyed joining a party when the opportunity arrived, but it was a rarity for her to be asked to come along. Tahi was too loud, and her mannerisms too boisterous, and would often scare animals off. Alex had not been happy when she had invited herself along, but had gritted her teeth and accepted it.  
The boats were kept in a shed on a slice of beach on the opposite side of the island. It was possible to cut through the forest to get there, but Alex didn't want to take that route. Faith lacked the experience, and Tahi lacked the skills to fend off any forest predator they could have run into. Instead Alex led the party around the forest. Faith had not yet explored much of this island, she had been told not to. She had been warned of the dangers she might find if she wandered too far from the village. Tahi told stories of wolves living in the forest and the evil creatures that controlled them. The island was so beautiful, that Faith found these stories hard to believe. How could such darkness exist in a place like this? She had thought, but then she would think of what else lived in Neverland. This island was but a single light in the dark, and if what Alex had heard was true then its beauty was only skin deep. The party stopped at the beach, Alex looked into the sky and then towards the horizon.  
"We still have enough sunlight to reach the island before nightfall." She said. She gestured for Faith to join her at the shed to help pull their boat down to the shore.  
"I had planned to get you alone." She said in a hushed tone. "I overheard the chief talking last night, it was late, long after the celebrations had ended."  
"And?"  
"He was talking with his 'council'" she made a face, Alex didn't respect the council much at all. The men in it had done nothing to earn their position other than having been brought to Neverland at the same time as the chief and his family. "They were talking about you."  
"What were they saying?" Faith asked.  
"They think you will try to escape and go back to Hook."  
"Escape? You make it sound like I'm a prisoner."  
"It's the exact word they used. They were talking about how 'it needs to happen before Hook returns.' whatever it is. They discussed everything you do. They have been watching your every movement… it's why I wanted to get you on your own."  
"But Tahi-"  
"Invited herself. I hope she has nothing to do with whatever it is that the council are planning, but we cannot be sure."  
"And the men?"  
"They hate the council as much as I do. You can trust them."  
Faith looked over at the men, they had been keeping Tahi distracted, loading fishing traps and spears into their own considerably larger boat. The plan was for Alex to lead the way to the next island with Faith in the small boat. She had told Tahi this was so that she may teach Faith how to use the boat. This was only partially true, Alex also wanted to talk to Faith some more where she would be well out of the vicinity of prying ears.   
"I have a plan, you see." Alex said as Faith pulled on the rope that operated a small sail on the boat, "if things come to it, I can help you get away. This is why I am showing you how to use our boats, why I am taking you to this other island."  
"Why try to help me at all?"  
"I have seen this play out before." Alex admitted. She spoke quietly, occasionally stopping to check their surroundings. If she was overheard, it would put her and Faith in a lot of danger. The incident had happened a very long time ago, starting when one of Hook's fleet had come to trade with the tribe. Alex remembered it so clearly because it was unusual for any of the fleet to trade without Hook also being present. She had been expecting them to drop off medicine, seeds, metal and gems, but there had been none of the usual goods. Instead, what these pirates had delivered had been a row of dark skinned women in shackles. The chief had been most pleased and paid the pirates well. Alex remembered watching from a tree branch as the women were taken away to where the chief met with his council. She hadn't meant to spy, but she had been so much younger and full of curiosity. She had tried to talk about it with her parents, but they told her to forget about it, to never mention it again, it was dangerous for her to know so much. Alex had heeded their warning at first, trying to ignore how the women had been kept away from the tribe, how they were treated like property. Like cattle, and often worse than that. Children were miracles, children were magic, but seldom few women of the tribe ever fell pregnant, and of those few who did- most of them died. All Alex knew at that time was that the chief had bought women and had given them to men he deemed worthy. As if they were little more than any other material that the pirates would trade. She would later learn that he felt justified in his actions, he called it a necessary evil. Alex remembered the screams that came every night so clearly that if she thought hard enough it would be as if the women were right beside her, screaming and begging for mercy once more. She didn't understand at the time, she had been so afraid but she had the drive to find out what was happening. Her knack for going unnoticed made Alex a great hunter, it also meant she could easily find out anything she needed to know. All she had to do was find a spot and listen. Seven women had been delivered to the chief. Two of the seven killed themselves, no one was meant to know that. The story that the chief had told his people was that they were sick, that they had contracted a disease from those rapist pirates. A few of the women had tried to plan an escape, they had been punished severely for their plan. The chief had told his people that the women had been stealing from them. During the brutal punishment, one woman had died. She had been pregnant at the time. Alex spat angrily when telling that part of the story, it was the one time she allowed herself to get so emotional about what had happened. The whole situation disgusted her, but she couldn't let herself be overcome with anger. It was too late for that type of raw and volatile anger to be useful. She calmed herself and returned to her blunt, factual recounting of what had happened. She thought that was what would be best for Faith to hear. Alex stopped talking abruptly, footsteps were fast approaching the shed, Tahi had come to help with the boats.  
“You’re being quiet.” She said.  
“Well there’s a lot to check with the boats. Can’t have any leaks.” Alex explained, trying not to sound suspicious. She tapped the side of one of the boats, “Everything looks good to go!” Tahi shrugged and dumped her pack into the bigger of the two boats without a word of complaint.  
The small island with the wide river, as the tribespeople called it, was very aptly named. Faith could have easily walked the length of the entire river in a single day, but crossing it by foot would be a dangerous task. Alex ordered Tahi and the two men to stay downstream whilst she took Faith a few miles further upstream under the guise of it being a better place for a complete novice to fish. They made camp by a tall and old tree whilst there was still daylight to spare.  
"What happened to the last women?" Faith asked. She had not spoken much since Alex had told her the first part of the story.  
"One of them had been with child." Alex said, "but she had been afraid and had kept it hidden. One night the men discovered the women missing and tracked them down to the forest. The chief called it witchcraft, he said that the women had conspired to kill the child in a ritual to destroy our people. I never did believe that. He had them killed and left their bodies for the wolves. Maybe they did curse us though. Not one child has been born since. Before it was rare, but it happened. Not anymore."  
"Why is the chief so concerned about babies?" Faith asked, "I know you say that they're miracles and all, but I just don't get it." Alex was quiet for a few moments, thinking of the best way to explain everything. It was hard because there was just so much that Faith was unfamiliar with. She may live with the tribe, but she wasn’t one of them. Not yet, perhaps not ever.  
"The chief's wife, my birth mother, before she died was a seer of sorts. The story goes that one night whilst she sat in her tent, she saw a vision in the smoke of her burning herbs. A child who, like Peter Pan, could fly. This child would deliver our people to, well, I'm not sure exactly where to… some people say the child would take us back home, others say the child would take us to a new land that would forever be ours, some people believe the child will deliver us to our ancestors where we shall be like gods." She took a breath, “You see, the tribe doesn’t like being here, and the longer they remain the more desperate they are to leave.”  
"What do you think about the prophecy?" Faith asked, Alex shrugged.  
"I'm not sure. She's not around to tell people what it all meant, the spirits could have just been showing her that she would give birth to me. I guess in a way I did deliver her to the ancestors." Alex shrugged again, she hardly ever thought about her birth mother. She had been told that she was a lot like the seer, Alex often saw things that others missed. It was her strong intuition that had led her to worry so much over Faith's fate, and the thing that made her stop talking when she did. There had been a distant sound in the forest that was not natural, a sound not made by an animal. A sound not made by the wind, the winds had been still that night. Whatever had made such a sound had been too far away to hear the hushed conversation that had been taking place, but Alex knew whatever was there would be getting closer. Faith opened her mouth to speak but Alex raised a hand, signalling her to be quiet. It was possible that Tahi had slipped away from Mafu and Tokoni and had come to spy on them, it was also possible that Pan and the lost children were nearby. Alex listened intently and grabbed a spear, she stood silently and crept towards where the trees began to grow closer together. She stood quietly in the shadows then suddenly, in a single swift movement, turned and threw the spear. There was a scream and a this, then Tahi came storming from the trees towards her, skirt torn from how close the spear had come from her hiding spot in the branches of a tree.  
"What were you thinking?" She screeched at Alex, brandishing the thrown spear.  
"That you could have been one of Pan's! You're lucky I missed! What are you doing so far from your camp?" Alex was furious.  
"I was bored. All those two speak about is hunting and women."  
Alex rolled her eyes, it was obvious to her that Tahi was lying, but she didn't want to make a fuss. She didn't want to risk Tahi being any more suspicious of her than she clearly already was.  
"Fine, come join us for a while." Alex conceded. Tahi smiled and placed herself close to Faith.  
"So what have you been talking about?" She asked, still smiling.  
"Hook." Alex said, hoping it would put Tahi off.  
"What about him?" Tahi made a disgusted face.  
"I was wondering what he was like." Alex said.  
"Strong." Faith recalled, "unbelievably strong… he could lift a man clean off of his feet."  
"No way."  
"I saw him do it."  
"When?"  
"The day after I met him... there was this man who… well I'd got myself into trouble with the night before and we were walking by and suddenly he lunged at me." Faith looked downwards, thinking of Eli still made her feel uneasy, "Hook put himself in the way, he protected me, held the fucker up by the throat… almost choked the life out of him." Tahi gasped and held her hand over her mouth in shock.  
"You must have been so scared living with a man who has such a temper." She said.  
"I was at first." Faith admitted, "but then I started to know him, and he wasn't so scary at all. I even started to like him in a way… he was good to me when he really didn't need to be."  
"Do you miss him?" Tahi asked, and Alex shot Faith a dangerous look that told her to stay quiet. Faith shrugged and shook her head, hoping it would be a satisfying enough answer to the question. Of course she missed Hook, she thought about him every day. She drew her knees closer to her chest and stared into the campfire. She was more afraid now, of the chief and his plans, than she had ever been of Hook.  
"Right." Alex said, "I think it's time for you to go back to your camp, we all need rest. We've got an early start ahead of us."  
Tahi did not like being told to leave, but did so anyway. Alex listened closely to make sure her footsteps faded away in the right direction then crawled into the tent, beckoning for Faith to follow her. Alex had no intention of going to sleep so soon, but she wanted Tahi to believe she had. She knew her half sister was bound to glance over, looking for their silhouettes against the campfire.  
"Was it true?" She asked  
"What?"  
"The story about Hook protecting you from that man."  
"Oh, that. Yeah." Faith sighed, sadly.  
"Was it really the day after you met him, too?"  
"Really really."  
"Tell me about when you met him… if you don't mind."  
Faith paused, taking a deep breath, then began to tell Alex the tale of her arrival in Neverland. Alex stayed quiet throughout, feeling Faith's words as much as she was listening to them. Faith told her about the scar on her right hand, and how it connected her to Neverland and to Hook. Faith told her about Grace and the events that came to pass in that cabin in the clearing, raising her skirt to show the extent of the protective tattoos Grace had given her. Then she came to the part of her tale that she had already touched on that night. Walking with Hook through the town, meeting Eli again, how Hook protected her and then gave her a home upon his ship.  
"And that's what happened when I met him." She ended, lamely.  
"You make him sound like a remarkable man." Alex said.  
"You say that like you've never met him."  
"The chief permits only a few people to actually talk to the pirates. The council, his family, and those of a higher status than just a hunter. I would like to meet him, though. I would ask to join his crew." She looked away, ashamed at her feelings, "I want to leave the tribe."  
"You know how to sail." Faith said, urgently, "you could sneak away tonight and make your way to him, there are islands nearby that he often stops at." Alex shook her head.  
"If I leave then I won't be able to help you when the time comes."  
"I'll work something out! I am protected, remember?" Faith gestured to her tattooed thighs, "the chief and his council can't hurt me." Alex thought about the situation, there was certainly magic in those markings, she could feel it. She wanted to leave the tribe behind, she wanted to see more of the world she lived in. She wanted something new, something exciting, and now the opportunity was right in front of her.  
"What will happen when they notice me gone in the morning?" She went quiet, thinking of the possible consequences of leaving like this. Faith was quiet, too, devising a plan.  
"They won't go looking for you." She said, at last.  
"What?"  
"I have a plan… it's going to hurt…"  
"Tell me."  
"We have to trash the camp and go into the forest and… well… you're going to have to beat me up a bit, cut me, make it look like a struggle."  
"No-"  
"I can take it. You've done a lot to help me so let me help you. Okay?"  
Faith explained her plan, Alex wasn't completely sure of it, but if Faith could keep the others convinced of the story for even a day, then she would have a good chance of getting away. They walked into the forest quietly, trying to find a spot where Alex could easily run from without causing suspicion.  
"Are you sure about this?" She asked Faith one more time.  
"Absolutely."  
Alex did not want to cause Faith too much harm, so she was careful with the cuts she made. A nasty gash across her sternum, then another at her bicep, mimicking the clumsy slashing of a lost boy's dagger skills. Then she threw the first punch, Faith tensed and threw her arms up by instinct.  
"I'm sorry." She whispered  
"No, it's good, you need to look like you tried to defend yourself. Next time make some noise."  
Faith closed her eyes and accepted the barrage of attacks that came, she groaned in pain. Right before Alex was ready to run, she turned to Faith with a serious look on her face.  
"If this works, I need you to promise me one thing?" She said hurriedly  
"What is it?"  
"The moment you get a chance, go find your captain. It's obvious you're in love with him." Alex then ran off, leaving Faith dumbfounded and alone. She closed her eyes tight, coming back to her senses, screamed and rushed in the direction of the second camp.  
"Help… help me." She gasped upon reaching the tent. The men and Tahi had been awoken by the scream and were already preparing to investigate.  
"What happened?" Mafu asked, his eyes darting to the trees to look for the danger.  
"Lost boys." Faith said between breaths, winded from her short run, "Alex chased them off, said she'll row back for backup."  
"Should we go after her?" Tahi asked  
"No. She’s the fastest of us, she is the only one who could stand a chance of staying ahead of the lost children." Tokoni interjected  
"What if they get to her?" Tahi asked, shaking with fear, Mafu stayed silent. He didn't want to think of that possibility. Minutes passed before he spoke again.  
"Tahi, stay here with your friend, try to tend to her wounds. I shall go with my brother to pack up the other camp. We make our way back to the village at sunrise." He straightened his back and picked up a spear before walking away, Tokoni following closely behind. Tahi was still shaking, although she hated the idea of any child being hurt she was still terrified of the lost children. Faith laid on the grass next to her, her whole body felt like it was stinging and the blood drying on her skin itched. Tahi did not speak as she wrapped Faith's wounds in cloth from the small medical chest that came with all hunting and fishing parties. Faith tried to tell her that it wasn't necessary, that Neverland would heal her. Tahi didn't seem to hear her, though, she was simply going through the motions. She had once thought that in their hearts, the lost children were just children. Seeing Faith all bloodied and bruised shaken her to her core. She had thought Hook evil for having killed so many, but could innocent children really be so capable of such an attack? Tahi's hands shook as she tied off the bandage on Faith's arm.  
"It's going to be fine." Faith assured her, "Alex chased them off, and we only have a few more hours until sunrise." Tahi smiled weakly.  
"What happened back there?" She asked.  
Faith made up a story on the spot, how they had been woken up by the sound of lost boys in their camp, how they had destroyed the tent, how Alex had pulled Faith to her feet and directed her to the forest. The lost boys, Faith said, had caught up to them easily. That's when the attack happened. Faith told Tahi all about it, Alex using her spear to fight back,and eventually making the lost boys back off.  
"She went to the boat so she could reach the village after that." Faith said, "and I came here to warn you guys."  
"I hope Alex made it to safety." Tahi said, convinced by Faith's lies  
"Me too." Faith agreed, although her and Tahi's ideas of safety were very different. It would take a few days for Alex to reach any of the islands Hook frequented, Faith hoped that she would have the strength and determination to do it, but if anyone was capable of such a feat it was Alex.  
No one from the fishing trip slept in the remaining nighttime hours, the men kept their watchful eyes over the camp whilst Faith kept an eye on Tahi. She had not handled the news of lost boys well and kept startling at the smallest of things. Faith was worried, too, but not for the same reasons as the rest of the camp. She couldn't tell them though, she couldn't let them suspect a thing. So she acted more nervous than she was, pacing up and down, fiddling with her bandages and looking over her shoulder. Only when daylight hit did she breathe a sigh of relief, Alex should have been out of the line of sight of the village by now, perhaps past the island entirely. Faith offered to help row when the boat had been packed up, but Tokoni would not allow it.  
"Your arm." He said, "it needs to be rested. You were brave last night, so now you shall rest."  
"My arm is fine-"  
"No."  
Faith sat in front of Tahi in the boat, she was worried about her, too. Tahi still seemed so on edge.  
"Tahi," Faith said, "when we are back in the village, would you like to stay at my place for a few days?" Tahi looked at her, but didn't say a word, "it's just I don't think I'll be able to sleep on my own too easily…" she added, lying so that Tahi would not feel bad about her own fearfulness. Tahi nodded, but still did not speak. Her usually bright eyes now looked dull and lifeless. Faith felt bad for thinking that it would work in her favour, no one would feel comfortable questioning her story with Tahi like this, especially not the chief.  
When they arrived back at the village, people gathered around, the group had not been expected back for a few days and Alex was missing. The group made their way, somberly, to the chief's cabin so Faith could tell him their story. The chief sat and listened, brows furrowed, as Faith spoke.  
"But you know this, don't you? Alex-" Faith started  
"Did not make it back." He said, "Mafu, you ought to tell her family. I know you were close." Mafu nodded and left the cabin.  
"Papa." Tahi spoke for the first time that day, "will you be sending word for him to come back?"  
"No. I will send our warriors to assess the situation first. The lost children may have only been nearby temporarily, if that is the case then the captain need not return until our next trade."  
"Good." Tahi said  
"Now go, get some rest."  
Faith helped Tahi pack up some necessities and moved them into her own small cabin. She unrolled the sleeping mat next to her own as she had a feeling that Tahi would want to stay close by. It was easy to fall asleep after such a night, the two women were exhausted and slept through until the next morning. Faith slipped effortlessly back into her routine, it was a distraction from all that had piled up in her mind. Stirring pots of rice, harvesting corn from the fields, feeding livestock, shovelling out the enclosures. Simple work, repetitive tasks, calming in their own way. As the days passed, Tahi began to return to her normal self, following Faith around and helping out with whatever work she was doing.  
"I bet you never had animals on the ship!" Tahi said one afternoon as Faith lovingly brushed her favourite goat.  
"Actually we did. Hugo, the ship's cook, kept two goats and a few chickens too. There were also the cats… He put me in charge of them, the babies were the cutest things." Faith smiled, remembering the way that the kittens sat on her lap and the sounds they made whilst playing. Then she remembered her own cat, from before Neverland, and became suddenly sad. Faith took a few deep breaths, trying not to cry, it had been so long since she had thought about home and realising that only made her feel worse.  
"What's wrong?" Tahi asked  
"I'm just thinking about home, you know? Do you remember life before Neverland?"  
"Of course I remember. It was different there. I had so many brothers, and even more sisters. I spent most of my time with the other women raising the children. I was due to be married but… he never made it here." She went quiet, Tahi didn't often talk about life before Neverland, she didn't need to, most of the people around her already knew the story. The great tsunami that should have wiped her tribe from existence. Many people died, but a few had been saved and brought to Neverland. Her tribe had been different before, all people from the same part of the same island, now her tribe was made up of people who had come from many different tribes. They had all been saved in their own way, and they had all found each other, now their once separate stories, cultures, and histories were forever intertwined.  
"I'm sorry." Faith said, she hadn't meant to bring up bad memories. Despite her bravado, and despite Alex's suspicions that Tahi was part of the chief's plans for Faith, Faith had started to see just how delicate the young woman was. Her playfulness and sunny disposition were a mask that she could hide behind. Faith felt sorry for her.  
"I miss my homeland." Tahi admitted, "I miss having such a big family. Here it's just me, Malo, and papa." She sighed and finished filling the goats' feeding trough, then wandered off to see to the chickens.


	13. Chapter 13

Time passed strangely in Neverland, this Faith knew. It was a fact. But it felt far stranger in the village. Since the incident that took place during the fishing trip, the chief had become much more stringent with rules and who was allowed to go to certain places. No evidence of the lost children had been found, but the chief and his council, believing Alex to be dead, did not want to risk losing any more lives. He had ordered everyone outside of the nighttime guard to be inside by the time the moon reached its peak. He also implored everyone to get their daily chores done early so there would be no need to be outside of the village after dark. These rules and monotonous daily tasks made days blend together into one mass that Faith could hardly pick apart. It gave her the same feeling she had had whilst in hospital, and the times she had been housebound due to ill health. During the day, sometimes the women would form a group to cook together. They would tell stories and sing songs in their native languages, but Faith had only picked up the basics and couldn't keep up with them.  
"You'll get there." One of the younger women told her with a smile.  
"I'm not sure, there's so many languages and they're all so different." Faith said, defeated.  
"You have all the time in the world to learn. You'll get there."  
All the time in the world. Faith ruminated on those words. They were true, she did have all the time in the world. Centuries could pass, millennia even. All the time that there ever was or ever could be. Forever. Forever used to feel like a hypothetical and nothing else, but now Faith was staring it in the face. She couldn't tell if it was terrifying or enticing. A lot of things could happen in a timespan that literally lasted forever. How many more changes would she see in her lifetime? Would she live to see new technologies come to life, or was Neverland a place that would forever be the same? She didn't know, part of her didn't even want to know. Things felt slower here, and also faster. She had been so lost in her thoughts about time that she had almost missed the whispered question from the woman sitting across from her.  
"Tell us about him." She urged, "Captain Hook. Is he as wild as he seems?"  
"He can be very frightening." Faith said, "he can also be kind, and gentle."  
"Is it true that his blood is black? And that he whips his crew until their skin is falling from their backs? Do his eyes really turn red when he's angry?" She whispered.   
"His blood is as red as mine." Faith said, remembering the horrific sight of his shoulder after he had been shot, "I never saw him use the whip." She paused, looking at the women around her, they seemed bored hearing that Hook wasn't the monster they had heard he was, "He did beat the physician pretty bad once, he was trying to protect me. But, yes, his eyes do turn red." The women gasped, that final titbit had been enough to satisfy their desire for a 'monster'. None of them had ever been close enough to the captain to see his eyes, they had heard so many stories about him and how terrible he was over the years that he had become a curiosity to them, they were both fascinated and afraid. Even out of the women that the chief allowed to associate with the pirates, seldom few had ever approached Hook and those who did, rarely spoke of it. One of the women leaned in to ask another question, but stopped abruptly. Some men had approached the circle of women, looking for a snack. These women knew better than to let such a conversation be overheard, so the talking switched back to being in languages that Faith did not understand. She continued her preparation of food in silence, finishing before any of the other women by a good margin. Faith glanced towards the ocean. By then she had spent more time away from Hook than she had ever spent with him. It bothered her that she still could not help but think of him. Not a day passed that he was not in her thoughts. When she thought about Hook, Faith would often experience a falling sensation coming from deep within her chest. She missed him, but she couldn't tell a soul, she missed him like she missed warmth on a cold night in November when reaching for a blanket to wrap around her shoulders. In the privacy of her small cabin, Faith shed a tear for all of the things she had lost by staying in the village. She thought of Alex and all that she had left behind to escape the village. Friends, a loving family, a supportive community. She had thrived here since birth, but Alex wanted more than that. Faith hoped that she was close to finding what she was looking for. At that moment Faith felt further away than she had ever been from finding her own happiness. Perhaps Hook had been right, perhaps she could have found it at sea.   
As quickly as the monotony had set in, it changed. Faith noticed the sudden urgency in the way people went about their daily work. There had been no order from the chief to do such a thing, the tribe just did so on instinct and Faith did not understand. Even the usually casual and light-hearted Tahi was working hard, preparing corn and parcels of food. When Faith asked her what was going on, she didn't even look up.  
"There's a storm coming." She said, furiously grinding the corn, "can't you feel it?" She grabbed a handful of the ground corn to check the texture, then threw it back into the bowl with a groan. Faith wasn't sure what she was supposed to be feeling, the weather was pleasantly warm and the sea was still calm, there were no clouds in the sky and the humidity was low. If a storm was coming, then it had to be very, very, far away. Still, Faith followed the lead of the other women without question. Preparing many large portions of bread dough made from the freshly ground cornmeal. Another group of women were sitting nearby weaving huge leaves together. Faith learned that this would be used to cover the crops in the hopes of protecting the soil in the farmlands from becoming too water-logged. The days went by, and more preparations were made, each morning cooler than the last, each day the sky turned darker. When the storm did come, Faith felt fully prepared. That evening she counted off her chores on her fingers. She had gathered food and water to last her a week, she had helped cover the crops, she had locked the animals into their enclosures. She worried about the animals more than she did herself. Faith was not afraid of thunder and lightning, in fact, she quite liked heavy storms. The sounds of rain against a roof and the rumblings of thunder were calming to her. She never slept as well as she did during a storm. The rain came like a sheet of water covering the island, so heavy that it was hard to make out what was right in front of her face. Faith had never seen a storm like it before, yet, she felt quite at ease with it until her thoughts turned to Alex. If Alex was still traveling between small islands she could have easily been caught in it, her small boat had not been built to withstand such weather. But Alex was smart, and understood Neverland's temperament, Faith reminded herself. Alex would have seen it coming and made her own preparations. Then Faith thought about the Jolly Roger, Hook had called the ship 'unsinkable' and Faith hoped that was true. The sea was so violent that it was hard to imagine any ship being safe on it. Maybe Hook was far away though, far outside of the storm's reach. That would be best for him, but a terrible thing for Alex. Faith laid across her sleeping mat and closed her eyes, trying to erase every image of a capsized ship and broken fishing boat that had been seared into her eyelids. There was nothing she could do to help Alex now. She could only hope and pray that she got to safety in time. A deafening crash of thunder threw Faith out of her thoughts like a wrestler being thrown from the ring, and brought Tahi to Faith's door. She was soaked and looked terrified.  
"What are you doing here?" Faith asked, concerned, "it's not safe to leave your… nevermind, come in." She ushered Tahi inside and started to help her dry off.  
"You've never seen a storm here before." She said, "I thought you might be scared so I came to keep you company." Faith saw through this lie immediately, it was Tahi who was afraid and needed the comfort.  
"I don't mind a storm." Faith told her.  
"You're not even a little bit frightened?" Tahi looked to the floor, embarrassed by her own fear.  
"Well maybe a bit." Faith said, thinking once more of those she knew who were at sea.  
"Well, in that case I can take your mind off of it. I have good news!" Tahi tried to look excited, but her fear still shone through, "papa says that you and Malohi will be married on the next full moon!" Faith took a step back in shock. The news certainly had taken her mind off of things, but not in the way that Tahi had hoped. "You don't look happy?" Tahi prodded.  
"Malohi doesn't want to get married, he told me so quite often." Faith said, "and I don't want to get married either."  
"I thought you liked him."  
"I do," Faith said, "just not like that."  
"But you've laid together, why would you do that if you didn't want him?" Tahi sounded genuinely confused, having never been with a man before.  
"Because it felt good at the time." Faith admitted, exasperated, " besides, we haven't been together recently. I haven't even spoken to him in a while. We can't get married, it makes no sense."  
"But you will have such wonderful babies!" Tahi argued.  
"I don't want that." Faith threw back, suddenly Tahi's temperament changed. Anger, hurt, fear, and insecurity all bubbled to the surface, all fueled by whatever stories her father had been feeding her.  
"Well, what you want doesn't matter." She spat, "you don't have a choice. You joined our people, this is our custom!"  
"Actually, I think that I do have a choice." Faith said, calmly.  
"What choice do you have? You can't run back to Hook, he doesn't want you. If he did he would never have left you behind in the first place. You don't even know where he is."  
"I can find him. I will find him." Faith looked defiantly at Tahi, standing firm and ignoring the storm outside.  
"How can you find him when you can't even sail our boats?"  
"I'll work it out." Faith insisted. Tahi laughed.  
"You'll end up dead on the rocks within a day." She said, darkly, sounding more like a threat than a warning.  
"Well, at least that would beat being a broodmare for your brother!" Faith didn't know how Tahi would react, but of all the possibilities she least expected for the woman to hit her. Tahi was far stronger than she looked, and that single punch was enough to split Faith's top lip open. Tahi looked at her knuckles, eyes wide, she hadn't wanted to hit Faith quite so hard, she hadn't wanted to draw blood. Tahi started to apologise, but Faith wasn't having any of it. She pushed Tahi aside with the same strange force she had once summoned to push Eli away with. Tahi went flying, but Faith did not stop to check on her. Her only option was to take her chances with the storm. Faith left her cabin swiftly, making her way to the beach where the boats were kept. She didn't think that Tahi would try to follow her.  
She had made it to the farmlands by the time Tahi had caught up with her. Tahi screamed something at Faith but had been drowned out by the storm. Faith did not care to hear what she was saying. More threats and obscenities, she assumed. All of Alex's suspicions had been proved correct. Tahi ran towards her, still screaming, quickly closing the gap. She was fast, and there was no way Faith could outrun her. She closed her eyes and breathed deeply, preparing for some sort of impact, preparing to fight. A fight was inevitable. Faith would never know if what happened next was luck, magic, or providence, but as Tahi closed in across the farm a bolt of lightning descended from the heavens setting the crops ablaze. Tahi panicked for a second, then turned on her heel to tell her father about the fire. The blaze lasted only a few minutes, but it was more than long enough for Faith to run into the forest where she knew she would be safe for a while. The tribespeople did not like going into the forest, and cutting through there was a quicker path to the boats. Faith was afraid, she knew her plan had little chance of success and would most likely end up in her death, but she had to try. It was now or never. As she approached the beach, the storm quietened down and Faith started to hear voices. They were not voices she recognised, she could just about discern the presence of three men. Faith approached the beach slowly, trying not to be seen until she could figure out who these people were. The men were dressed in simple clothes and we're trying to get into the fishing shed where the boats were kept. In the distance, Faith could just about make out the shape of a ship. She acted immediately, hardly thinking of what she was about to do. Raising her hands, she approached the men. They eyed her suspiciously.  
"That your ship out there?" She asked.  
"Might be. What's it to you" one of the men replied, closing the distance between them.   
"I want to speak with your captain." She said, trying to keep calm.  
"What you want with him?"  
"I… uh…" Faith thought quickly, "I need to get off of this island. The natives kidnapped me months ago. When I heard the guards talk about a ship I ran here. Please help me, they'll be here soon."  
"Ah fuck." He groaned and turned to his crew mates, "we gotta head back to the ship. Natives inbound." He looked Faith up and down, "don't s'pose there's much harm in letting you speak to the captain." He said and pushed Faith towards the longboat they had brought up to the beach.  
Captain Ciaran Blaine had once been a commander in the royal navy, he had been quite successful in his career for many years, but a lack of conflict in the territories had left him out of work and desperate to keep his wife and sons looked after. Piracy had been a quick way for him to make the money to keep them afloat. Captain Blaine was not a well liked man amongst his crew, but he was respected. He was the meanest and toughest of them all and had risen to his position via a trail of bloodshed. No one dared to challenge his rule. His face appeared to be permanently moulded into a sneer, looking down on whoever he was speaking to.  
"So the girlie wants to speak with me?" He sneered, voice icy with contempt, "what does it want?" He took a knife from his waistcoat pocket and began to clear the dirt and grime from his nails. Faith took a deep breath, refusing to let him intimidate her. No man could harm her. Grace had promised her that much.  
"I need to get away from here." She said, calmly.  
"Oh, do you now? And where is it you're looking to get away to? England? You sound like a Londoner. Scum." He spat on the floor to show his distaste. There was no love lost between England and this Irish pirate. Faith thought of London and her grandmother's ground floor flat there, and how nice it would be to be able to sit in an armchair and have a cup of tea there again. She thought of how nice it could be to sleep in her own bed again, and how much she missed her cat, but her heart was being pulled at by another force now, too.  
"You're going to get me back to my captain." She told him.  
"Is that right?" Blaine said, almost impressed with the audacity she had to make such a demand, "so, tell me, who is your captain?"  
"Hook." Faith said.  
"Hook? Never heard of him."  
"Captain Hook is perhaps the most feared man in these parts. He has killed beasts twice his size with nothing more than a dagger. He once lifted a giant beast of a man clean off of his feet and almost choked the life out of him- with only one hand. I've never known him to lose a fight. And his ship is both bigger and faster than any you could ever hope to captain. You don't know him now, but you will. One way or another you will be taking me to him, I guess it's up to you if you want him to be very happy or very angry." Faith looked captain Blaine dead in the eyes. He chuckled darkly and placed the dagger down on his desk.  
"You've got some big balls for a little girl." He sneered, "I think I'll be taking my chances with this 'Hook' and his anger." Blaine stood up and dragged Faith outside of his quarters and ordered one of his men to lock her below deck somewhere out of his sight. His final words being, "Do what you want with her."  
The room was barely bigger than a cupboard, Faith could just about sit down with her legs outstretched, and had to curl up into a ball to lay down to sleep. At its worst, the storm threw her violently against the walls. If she was lucky, once a day Faith would be given a small canteen of water and some bread. Although there were days that she would be given nothing at all and would be left alone in the dark. From her prison she listened in to the conversations that went on between the men outside. They were lost, unable to navigate, the stars were wrong and they found no familiar landmass nearby. They were growing increasingly frustrated with their captain, and captain Blaine had become increasingly frustrated with his crew. One night, or at least Faith assumed that it was nighttime, she overheard shocked and panicked whispers. Someone was dead, Blaine had killed him. Thrown him overboard.   
"Fuck it, that's one more portion of food and water for us." One man had said callously. They had started rationing supplies the day before, and if Blaine was killing men over it she knew that she could meet a similar fate soon enough, too. She closed her eyes wondering just how long she would be locked away in this room. Too long. The ship rocked, days passed, tensions rose, Faith grew thirsty and hungry, she was tired and weak, she had lost all hope. She would die in this darkness.  
Faith could tell something was wrong the moment that the wooden plate hit her cheek. The pirates had, once again, not been kind when supplying her food. She had grown accustomed to it being thrown at her. It had never hit her before, and it hurt. Her cheek stung. No man was supposed to be able to harm her. Not in Neverland. If she had been hurt, and she had been hurt, it meant that she wasn’t there any more. Faith panicked worse than she had since being on this ship. She didn’t know where she was, she didn’t know when she was. She sobbed uncontrollably, her whole body ached, her soul screamed out for that precious thing that had been torn from her. She cried and cried, she cried until she was sick. By an awful stroke of luck, a pirate had been trying to eat outside her door at that very moment. Disgusted, he threw it open.  
“If you’re going to do that, do it over the fucking edge.” He grabbed Faith by the wrist and dragged her up the stairs to the main deck, shoving her head over the edge of the ship. The wood digging into the soft skin of her throat made her choke, the man did not let go. Faith grasped at the edge, pathetically trying to balance herself and gain some semblance of control. The only thing she managed to gain from that endeavour was a nasty cut on her palm from a loose nail. Blood dripped down her hand and arm, and over the edge of the ship into the sea. The man holding her swore loudly and pushed her aside. It was bad enough luck to have a woman on board, and now her blood had been spilled. No good could come to the ship because of this. He tried not to draw attention to the situation, but it was no use. A small crowd already surrounded Faith.  
“You’ve doomed us all.” An old man shouted, “You don’t spill a woman’s blood on a ship!”  
“It will be fine.” The other man said unconvincingly, “If we throw her overboard it will cancel out her bad luck.” The old man shook his head.  
“It’s too late for that. Just look.” He pointed out to the sea, it was dark and restless, and a thick fog was growing around the ship in all directions. Several of the men crossed themselves and began praying on their rosaries. They were all terrified, but Faith no longer was. Grace’s words rang loud in her mind.  
“Neverland lives within you now.” She didn’t know how she knew it so certainly, but Faith could tell that it had indeed been the shedding of her blood that caused this. Her blood had opened up some kind of gateway to Neverland. She was going back. Faith let out a laugh, strange and joyful, inappropriate for the situation. She kept on laughing, even as the men grabbed her and threw her back into the tiny room. She knew now, that she would survive.  
Days upon days had passed, but Faith couldn't tell. She hadn’t seen a single ray of light since her blood had been shed. There had been no food or drink. Just darkness. Then suddenly there was a thunderous crashing sound. The ship shook in a way unlike it had during any of the previous days, throwing her across the tiny room with a mighty force that left a bruise upon her cheek. A fight had broken out above. She heard the screams and the blood chilling moans of fallen men. The sounds of footsteps. The door was ripped open and a rough hand took a tight hold on her wrist, and dragged her upstairs to the main deck. The sunlight was blinding, Faith heard Blaine speak before her eyes adjusted to being in the light again.  
"I told you we had something you'd be interested in." He said. Faith blinked a few times, trying to get her eyes to focus on the scene before her. Captain Blaine and his crew were knelt in submission before another crew.  
"Captain!" Faith tried to call out, but her throat was so dry that the words got stuck. Hook glared at Blaine, his eyes turning red.  
"What did you do to her?" He demanded.  
"Me? Nothing much. Left her below deck for my men to enjoy." He smiled an evil and cruel smile. Without warning, Hook pulled a loaded pistol from his belt and placed a bullet in captain Blaine's head, leaving him to die with the same cruel look etched across his face. Hook crossed the deck to where Faith was still being held by another man. He bent down and looked at her closely. He took her right hand and pressed his lips upon the scar there. They had found each other again.  
“Did these men hurt you?” he asked, “Did they touch you?”  
“They wanted to.” Faith choked out, her voice hoarse from lack of water. Hook’s expression turned to anger, and for the first time Faith saw the man who could have been described as cadaverous, blackavised, dark, and sinister. She was not at all afraid of him. Hook took a few steps away from her and looked over his prisoners.  
“You three.” He pointed towards a huddle of teenage boys at the back, “Stand. You may join my crew.” The boys dare not argue with him and clambered away from their position to join the Jolly Roger. Hook nodded and gave his order,"Fire at will." He was followed without question, and in a matter of minutes all of Blaine's men had ceased to be. Hook escorted Faith across the planks and back to the Jolly Roger, back to his quarters, he provided her with a washcloth and a clean shirt to wear. Hook did not say much, only checking to make sure that Faith was okay, he left her alone in the room to preserve her modesty as she washed all of the dirt and grime from her body and hair. The tepid water from the wash basin did little to help Faith feel clean or refreshed, the lack of soap left her with no other option but to scrub at her skin with the rough cloth until it turned red. Even then, she still didn't feel clean. Faith could feel her heart racing, she had thought of little else than reuniting with her captain since being thrown into that dank and tiny room, and now it had happened she wasn't sure what came next. Before all of this, she had made the choice to leave him. It had been her decision. She wasn't suited to a life at sea, she wanted to find something she didn't think she ever would as part of the crew, she had felt like a burden, she had angered the ship's physician to the point of him threatening to leave. All of these reasons still lived in the shadows of her mind. If she had stayed in the village, in her small cabin made of bamboo she could have had a husband. She wouldn't have loved him, but maybe she could have grown to. Malohi wasn't a bad guy after all. The tribe wasn’t even bad, they weren’t bad people, they were just people who wanted to feel at home once more. But she couldn’t have stayed, the pressure to produce a child would have been too much. Just thinking about it was too much. Faith could not stop the racing of her thoughts, the anxiety so unyielding that she struggled to pull on the shirt that Hook had given her. It was long, being one of his own and Hook being at least a foot taller than her, but pulled tightly over her hips and curves, the sleeves hung comically past the ends of her fingertips. Faith tugged at the hem, feeling uncomfortable with how it clung to her stomach, she couldn’t ignore the way it felt. It was maddening. Every sensation over her skin overwhelmed her. She needed something, but she didn’t know what that was.  
There were no words passed between them when Hook first stepped back into the room. He approached Faith with the awkwardness of a young boy at a school dance, unsure of how he should act. He could tell by the paleness of her complexion and the dark circles around her eyes that Faith was exhausted and drained from whatever ordeal she had faced. He placed his hand lightly upon her shoulder, that was all it took for Faith to allow her weakened body to collapse into his, her face pressed against his chest and arms wrapped around his back. Hook held her to him as close as he could, not fully understanding the situation.  
"You're freezing." He said, rubbing his hand across her back, "why don't you get some rest?" He felt Faith shake her head against his chest before pulling away from him.  
"I… I don't want to be alone." She said, voice still quiet and hoarse.  
"I'll stay with you. I promise. I won't leave your side." He said. True to his word, Hook sat himself at Faith's side, and stayed there as she slept. The only time he moved from his position was to grab an extra blanket from the compartment built into the bedframe, which he then placed over her. He didn't want her to wake up still so cold. When she opened her eyes once more, night had fallen, Hook was still beside her. Faith sat up slowly and looked at him.  
"I really did find you, then." She said, Hook smiled at her.  
"You found me." He took her hand in his own and placed a kiss across the backs of her fingers.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Obligatory song that inspired this update : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AK8_EEqhwjk

As Hook's lips touched her skin, Faith's thoughts started racing once more.  
"Did Alex?" She asked in a panic.  
"Did Alex what?" Hook was confused at the sudden shift in the mood.  
"Find you? She came looking for you, she wanted to leave the village, leave the tribe…" Faith's words were rushed, almost leaving her tongue faster than her brain could create them. Hook was taken aback.  
"I had heard there was a young tribal woman looking for me, I didn't think it was of any urgency though, so I was planning to send word to have her taken safely back to her people."  
"You idiot!" Faith tried to shout through her sore throat, "if they find out what happened, they'll kill her!"  
"Tell me, dearest, what did happen?" Hook asked, trying to sound calm in spite of Faith's fear, trying not to make her any more distressed than she already was. Faith spoke quicker than ever, explaining what had happened and why Alex would be in danger if she were to return to the tribe. She told him every story that Alex had told her. About the chief, about the women he had bought, about the prophecy and the people's abject desperation to see home once more. Hook's jaw clenched as he mulled over what he had been told, he would have to go to Alex and make sure she was safe, he would also have to confront the chief for what he had planned to do with Faith. He couldn't exactly fault the man for wanting to take his people home. Hook knew the desire to see home again quite intimately. It always seemed to be the way, though, that Neverland brought out the worst in people.  
"If Alex gets hurt it will be my fault." Faith lamented, "I convinced her to go off looking for you."  
"I assure you that we shall get to her before anything bad can come of her running away. You have my word." He squeezed Faith's hand, and reclined. Faith quietly pulled her knees towards her chest, and looked at the man next to her. She trusted him completely. She had never known Hook to stray from his word. Every promise he made, he had kept. So if he said that they would get to Alex first, they absolutely would. They had to. Hook's fingers silently interlocked with her own, calming and comforting, the small action brought a sensation of fullness to Faith's chest. As if she had breathed in every ounce of safety that he had provided. As she turned her head and their eyes met, the last words Alex had said to her rang in her ears.  
"It's obvious you're in love with him." It didn't make sense at the time and it hardly made sense now. Faith still felt like she couldn't possibly know Hook well enough for that.  
"Captain?" She enquired  
"Hm?"  
"I… uh, before she left... Alex said something to me and, it's a bit awkward, I'm not sure if she was on to something… probably not, but I think there's something that I have to do to find out." Faith blurted out, Hook raised an eyebrow at her.  
"What is it you need to do, dearest?"  
"Uhh… I… uh… this." She moved quickly, cupping Hook's face in her hands and briefly pressing her lips against his. As she pulled away, Faith let out a nervous giggle, feeling a bit silly for having thought that had been a good idea at all. "She seemed pretty convinced that I was in love with you, but that's… no, I hardly know you."   
"Well, you could get to know me, my dearest, and then who is to say what might happen?" Hook grinned at her, his eyes twinkling in the candlelight. In his mind, something was already happening. He was certain that Faith would never have kissed him if there really was nothing to her friend's assertions.   
"Yeah… I might end up killing you." Faith joked, attempting to cut through the rising tensions.  
"You couldn't kill me, I doubt you could even cut me." Hook said, "you don't have it in you, you're not that kind of person."  
"You don't know what kind of person I am. Not really." Faith said, after all that had happened, even she didn't know what kind of person she was any more.  
"If that's the case, why don't you show me." Hook removed a knife from his belt and pressed it into Faith's hand, "cut me." He reached into his shirt and unclipped the strap that travelled across his chest, exposing his bare skin. He looked at Faith, daring her to be so bold. She faltered for a moment, then without really thinking things through, took action. She pushed the tip of the knife into Hook's chest and dragged it through his skin, his eyes widened. He had been expecting her to give the knife back to him, throw it across the room, do anything with it aside from actually turning the blade against him. Faith hadn't expected herself to cut him either, she hadn't thought at all, it had just happened. Clarity returned to her mind all too suddenly and Faith dropped the knife. Panicked, she started to apologise and pressed her hands over the jagged cut in an attempt to stem the bleeding.   
"There's no need to apologise, my dear." Hook said, stroking her cheek.  
"But I-" Faith started to argue, Hook's hand moved from her cheek to her right hand, pulling it away from his chest.  
"It's only fair." He said, circling the scar on her palm with his thumb, "you have my mark, and now I have yours." Without even knowing it, without understanding it, Faith had forever bound herself to the pirate. The hand that had remained pressed over his chest shook, she could feel the blood pooling beneath it, she pressed down as firmly as she could hoping it would make a difference. Hook did not appear to be anywhere near as concerned about the wound. He had experienced much worse and could feel that it was nowhere near as bad as it looked. When Faith pulled her hand away, the bleeding had stopped completely.  
"I'll clean it." She said, leaving the bed to get some alcohol and a piece of cloth. She moved as if she were a ghost, going through the motions, neither thinking nor feeling. She rinsed her hands in the wash basin and returned to Hook, "you should probably take your shirt off." She muttered, Hook obliged. Faith dabbed the area around the cut, removing the dried blood and thoroughly cleaning it. As uncomfortable and painful that stinging sensation was for him, Hook didn't move or make a sound as his cut was tended to. When she had finished, and had disposed of the soiled cloth, Faith found herself sitting awkwardly, balanced at the very edge of the bed next to the captain. She fiddled and pulled at the hem of the shirt she was wearing, not knowing what to say or how to act. Everything was different now. Every time she dared look up, she would find Hook looking at her so intensely, like he was trying to see straight into her soul and decipher its inner workings. He grazed her thigh with his fingers, following the lines of her tattoos visible through the fabric of the shirt right up to where they met the fold of her stomach. Faith stiffened slightly. She wasn't used to being touched like that.  
"Come closer." Hook requested, his voice like velvet, Faith edged closer to him, Hook smiled, satisfied that she had done so "I wanted to ask if perhaps I may…" he paused, fumbling with his words, "may I kiss you now?" He finished, Faith nodded almost imperceptibly but that was all it took for him to move. Faith had thought his kiss would be simple and unassuming like the one she had placed upon him earlier. She had thought wrong. Hook started at the side of her neck, moving slowly upwards towards her jaw before settling upon her lips, the whole time his hand remained on her body. Stroking and squeezing at the side of her stomach, then moving upwards to her breasts. Earlier Faith had thought that whatever feelings she had for the pirate were like her kiss, small and unassuming, and that Alex had been mistaken. But now she was aware of just how much wanted Hook. She had wanted to be someone's and here he was, just as he had always been, ready to take her and make her his own. Hook pushed Faith gently onto her back, but when she tried to reach down to the buttons on his breeches, he stopped what he was doing abruptly.  
"Are you sure that you want this?" He asked, still bent over her, his hair falling forward and brushing over her cheek.  
"Yes." She told him, Hook nodded and took a few steps away. He shrugged off the harness that held his hook tight to his body, exposing his usually hidden, scarred right arm.  
"Do you still want this?" He asked quietly, "do you still want me?" He emphasised himself in his question, because that is what he had meant all along. Wanting to kiss or to fuck, and wanting a person, are, after all, very different things.  
"Yes, captain. I want you." Faith said. Hook returned to her, continuing his attack, he wanted her now more than ever. That night the pirate did not take his woman, but instead gave himself to her. Wholly and completely. After her many nights with Malohi in the tribal village, Faith didn't think things could be quite like this. Hook's skin was rough, but his touch was so gentle. He was gentle in the way only a person of his size or strength could be. He moved slowly, savouring each sensation. Faith felt a closeness with him that she never had with Malohi, or any other man, when they finished it ended with something more than just satisfaction. It was then, as she looked at the man laying so close beside her, that Faith knew that she had made the right choice in coming back. That night, she could hardly take her eyes off of Hook, looking at him with the same intensity that he often looked at her with. Her gaze followed the lines around his eyes, the greys in his hair, and the scar that cut through his face. He didn't mind her looking, her eyes saw him differently to the eyes of others. There was no disgust or fear to be found in her expression. Hook smiled at her and Faith's cheeks flushed as she looked away at last. It had been his smile that had first filled her with butterflies, just as it did then, just as it would do so again and again. When she turned her eyes back towards the pirate he was still looking in her direction, he didn't want to look anywhere else. There was silence in the cabin, like the silence in a library, it was not an uncomfortable one. Faith lay on her side tracing her fingers over Hook's scars as if she were reading his story written in braille across his body. Her fingers danced across his chest to his shoulder, then down his right arm and its incomplete and blunt end. Hook's heart faltered, no woman had ever touched his arm in such a way before. The women he had been with since the incident had all but avoided his arm, some refusing to even look at it. One of the women he visited at the brothel had worked to overcome her aversion, but it wasn't the same. She still felt disgusted by him, and despite her efforts, her disgust remained obvious. Hook raised his arm, brushing it tenderly across Faith's cheek. He had expected her to cringe away from it, instead, she had leaned into the touch, a small smile appearing in the corners of her lips. Never in his life had Hook begged for anything. Not for mercy when he felt certain of impending doom, not for riches, or for loyalty. He had thought himself above it. Until that very moment.  
"Please, don't leave me again." He pleaded, begging Faith to stay with him, to be his, always.  
"I won't. Not ever. I promise." She sealed her vow with a kiss upon the scarred wrist that sent shivers rolling down Hook’s spine. Never could he have dreamed that someone could handle him so delicately. Never would he have imagined that a woman could accept him so completely. This woman had looked beneath his skin, to his ugliness and insecurity, and she had not looked away. She accepted him perhaps more than he accepted himself. It was a feeling beyond anything he had ever known before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ya know, I've realised that I still think of this as the tv show screenplay format I originally started writing in. Oops. from here on, let's just say that every chapter end is an ad break ;)


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vwVX4cG6F9s

The morning came and Faith awoke in an empty bed. She stretched her arms out and took a deep breath. The night before felt like a dream, everything that came before felt that way too. The tribe, Alex, Tahi, Blaine, it hardly felt real at all. She stood up, looking around the room, she noticed fabric draped carefully over the back of a chair. It was only when she held it in her hand that she realised what it was. Hook had kept her clothes. The gown, petticoats, pockets, shift, stays, stockings, even the thick padded roll to tie around her waist and give shape to the ensemble. He had kept it all. Faith slid into the familiar garments happily. Even lacing the stays felt more comfortable than it had been before. It was her choice now, to wear this costume and fill this role, before it had felt forced upon her. Something that she hadn't truly wanted. But now she did. Faith opened the door to blinding sunlight. The crew were working hard, raising sails and gathering speed. Hook walked the deck, shirtless, the mark Faith had left on him displayed for the world to see. He carried a heavy length of rope looped over his shoulder, he handed it off to a man standing at the base of the ship's tallest mast and came to join Faith by the steps.  
"Good afternoon." He smiled his crooked smile and placed his hand upon her arm, "you slept through the morning, I didn't want to wake you."  
"It doesn't feel like I slept for that long…" Faith trailed off. There was a lot she wanted to say but her brain couldn't quite find the words. "You kept my clothes." She said after a few moments of silence.  
"I did." Hook confirmed, "I suppose a part of me hoped that you would return. Smee thought it was insanity." In the daylight, out in the open, whatever it was that existed between the two felt awkward and unsteady. Neither party quite sure of how exactly to move forward. In the flurry of shifting moods and emotions the night before, they hadn't found the time to have the kind of conversation that could start to define what they were. Hook sat on the steps and extended his hand for Faith to join him. As she sat next to him, her skirts puffed out around her, making her feel more like she was sitting on the steps of a castle or stately home after a grand ball than on a pirate ship. Hook wrapped his hand around her own and looked downwards, his hair hanging over his face, hiding his expression. "I didn't think that I would ever see you again." He admitted.   
"But you kept my things anyway…" Faith prompted, trying to discern what was going on in the man's head.  
"It was more than that." Hook's grip on her hand grew tighter, "I collected items, things from ships we took, things that reminded me of you, that I thought you might like."  
"Really?" Faith was shocked, it was hard to believe that he had thought of her so often.  
"Really." Hook turned his gaze from the steps to her eyes, then placed a kiss upon her forehead, "now that we are courting, I would like to share these things with you." Faith hardly heard the complete sentence, hung up on a single word alone.  
"Courting?" She choked out, she hadn't thought of it like that, she hadn't really thought about it at all. But that word, that one word, had solidified the abstract shape of what had happened between them. It had made it feel real, whereas before it all still felt hypothetical to her.  
"Are you unhappy about it? Don't you want-"  
"It's not that," Faith cut him off, "it's just, I don't know, I hadn't thought." She admitted, "it's… you know, when I'm from people fuck and it doesn't mean anything. No one has really ever wanted me for anything other than a quick fuck before, and even then they don't usually want people knowing about it. I don't know. This is all new to me, you know? And it… it's all quite sudden, isn't it?" Her words came out in a swift torrent, just as they so often did when she felt nervous or overwhelmed. Hook thought quietly, absorbing all she had said to him. He had thought for a moment, been afraid even, that she had rejected him and his affections. Had been afraid that the clarity of daylight had let her see his true ugliness and had changed her stance on him completely. But he had been wrong. She was not rejecting him. The truth was that she was just like him, afraid.  
"If it will make you feel more comfortable, we can take things slowly." Hook said. Faith smiled and looked away, feeling suddenly shy and exposed, like Hook had opened the doorway to her vulnerabilities, allowing them all to come crashing down at his feet.  
"I don't know what to say." She told him, honest as ever, with a nervous laugh.  
"You don't need to say anything." He lifted her hand up just shy of his lips, "is this alright?" He asked, gauging just how much slower he should take things. Faith nodded, allowing Hook to kiss her hand. He smiled broadly and his hand travelled gently upwards, over her arm and shoulder and up her neck to her jawline, his thumb stroking her lower lip, "and this? Is this alright?" Faith nodded once more and leaned in towards him. He was so close, she could taste the rum on his breath and smell the oils upon his hair and beard.   
"Cap'n!"  
"What the bloody hell is it, Smee?" Hook snapped, annoyed that the moment had passed.  
"I think we ought to have a word." Mr. Smee said, cleaning his spectacles with his shirt, "in private." He added. Hook exhaled sharply and glanced towards Faith. He didn't want to be separated from her just yet  
"I'll go down to the galley, see if Hugo needs any help." She sighed. Faith had always had the feeling that Mr. Smee didn't like her much, moreover she had no desire to be around him at that time, anyway, not after he had intruded upon her moment with Hook. Ever the gentleman, Hook walked with her to the door that led below deck and kissed her hand once more before returning to the irate Mr. Smee.  
"You're back, then?" Hugo said with a grin.  
"I suppose I am." Faith replied.  
"For good this time?"  
"Seems that way."  
"The old bastard finally got his hook in you?"  
"Excuse me?"  
"You and the captain." Hugo clarified, gesturing vaguely with a knife, "you cannot tell me that nothing happened. You both go into his quarters yesterday afternoon, the next time we see him he's walking around with a nasty gash on his chest and he won't say a word about it."  
"Oh… that. I kind of stabbed him. It's complicated." Faith told him. Hugo laughed.  
"You definitely fucked him then." He said, "what was he like?" Faith flushed at the question, floundering with her words, making Hugo laugh almost maniacally.  
"I… uhh… so how are the cats?" Faith tried to change the topic. Hugo laughed harder but dropped the subject. He waved his hand lazily in the direction of a stack of crates, Faith turned around and saw the three cats for the first time in what could have been months. The kittens had grown so much, it seemed that the magic of Neverland didn't have the same effect on animals as it did people. She crouched down and stretched her hand out towards them, making kissing noises. The smallest of the three, the one with black fur, looked up curiously and made its way over to her. Faith turned her palm outwards and let the young cat sniff at her fingertips and rub up against them.  
"Oh, you're a friendly little kitty aren't you?" She cooed.  
"He's a lazy bastard." Hugo said, "it was only a few days ago I found him asleep with a mouse walking right over his paws."  
Faith scratched the cat beneath its chin with a smile, and began fussing over the small creature. Hugo rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to his work. It wasn't long before Faith was sitting in the corner behind the stack of crates with the cat curled up in her lap. Hugo was still sitting on his low stool, peeling potatoes and singing to himself in French. He had tried to get more information out of Faith about what had happened between her and Hook, but her lips were sealed tight. A steady stream of men passed back and forth through the area, some would playfully try to steal a potato from the bucket and would get a sharp whack over the knuckles, and a stern scolding in return. The joke had been so common, so long standing, that it was more a ritual of tradition than the common playfulness amongst the crew. Certain men passing by had to try to steal a piece of food, and Hugo had to catch them. Like many traditions on a ship, this too had become tied in with luck and superstition. If no one tried to steal from the pot, it meant that someone would soon die. If Hugo didn't catch a food thief, it would lead to the ship's food stores running dry. It was all superstition, and bore no truth to their lives. In Neverland, the pirates food stores never ran low. It was a part of what made the Jolly Roger special.  
Loud footsteps came thumping down the stairs. Hugo looked up briefly.  
"Captain." He said with a nod. Hook leaned against a post, arms crossed.  
"How have I not killed that man yet?" He said.  
"What one?"  
"The pious little Irishman."  
"Ahh." Hugo sighed, knowing Hook was, of course, talking about Smee, "well it wouldn't be through lack of trying." Hook chuckled, thinking of the many fights he had got into with Mr. Smee. Swords had been drawn and pistols shot many times over. Although Hook often found himself in disagreements with the man, he could not deny he was a good quartermaster. Mr. Smee kept the crew under control and for the most part maintained order and peace with ease.  
"I think I'll be needing the blades again." Hook said.  
"That bad, eh? No compromise to be made."  
"What he wants is… I won't do it." Hook huffed and grabbed a stool, he sat next to Hugo and started to slice the peeled potatoes, awkwardly keeping them in place with the blunt edge of his hook. Faith remained in the shadows with the cats, listening to his troubles. Too much had already been said for her to reveal herself to him without awkwardness.   
"You know, captain, I told Smee you wouldn't do it. I told him."  
"He's been talking about it to the men already?"  
"Only a few, getting a feel for numbers I suppose… if he wants a vote."  
"Bastard!"  
"I'm on your side, brother." Hugo assured him, "I told Smee that, too."  
"Bet he wasn't happy to hear it."  
"He was not." Hugo shot a look over to the crates where he knew Faith was and rolled his eyes again. He had thought she would have made herself known by now. His bemused look suddenly turned quite devilish as he turned his attention back to Hook. "So… you gonna tell me what happened yesterday? With your lady?" He asked with a grin.  
"She stabbed me." Hook said, Hugo looked disappointed, he already knew that.  
"I can see that." Hugo gestured towards the scabbed cut on Hook's chest with his knife, "c'mon something else must have happened to keep you busy for so long. Were her tits-"  
"You bastard!" Faith hissed from her place in the corner, making the cat on her lap jolt awake and slink off. Hugo began to laugh uncontrollably and dropped the potato he had been peeling. Hook stood abruptly.  
"My dear!" He greeted her, "I had no idea you were still down here." Faith glared at Hugo, before turning her attention to Hook.  
"Been hanging out with the cats." She said. Hook smiled, watching the black cat come back to Faith for more affection.  
"You like cats?" He asked, keeping his distance so that he wouldn't egg Hugo on any further.  
"Love 'em." She replied, "this little boy is so friendly." She picked the cat up and held him out for Hook to pet.  
"You could bring him upstairs with us, if you want to." Hook offered, Faith considered this, but eventually decided against it.  
"I'd feel bad separating him from his sister and mama." She said placing a kiss on the cat's head before putting him back down in the corner. Faith returned to the main deck with Hook, holding on to his arm. They walked together, not saying a word, just enjoying the breeze, sunlight, and the company. It was Faith who broke the silence first. "What's the problem with Mr. Smee?" She asked.  
"Nothing so important that you need to worry." Hook told her, avoiding giving an answer of any real depth.  
"It didn't sound that way."  
"Smee and I often have disagreements, we always settle things one way or another. I daresay that Yates has been in his ear again, but that's beside the point. We've got more important things to handle first."  
"Oh? Like what?" Faith raised a sceptical eyebrow and Hook smiled.  
"Well, first of all, right before the pious prick interrupted us-"  
"Oh, that!" Faith grinned shyly, and got up on her tiptoes. Hook still had to bend down a considerable amount for his lips to meet hers. The kiss was quick, ended by the whoops and clapping of a nearby pirate. Hook groaned as he straightened his back, it wasn't often that he bent down in such a way. Their height difference was so extreme that Hook could sit down on a chair whilst Faith stood and they would be just about level with each other's eyes. In fact there were some chairs, that if sat on, Hook would still be a few inches taller.  
"Second?" Faith prompted.  
"We're going to find Alex. It was my friend, a leather worker, who sent word of a tribal girl seeking me out. He's a good man." He assured her, "so if we're lucky all that we need to do to find her is anchor nearby and pay him a visit."  
"And if we're not lucky?"  
"We'll find her. She is one woman in a paddle boat, there is only so far she could go."  
"What if the chief went looking for her?" Faith knew that wasn't likely, but the possibility still scared her.  
"After what he's done? I'll strike him down before any harm comes to your friend. I promise." Hook held his hook over his heart and Faith nodded. She pressed herself firmly against him, looking out to the expanse of water in front of them. She couldn't help but think of Alex and the trials she must have faced. She hoped that her friend was fine. Happy and healthy, but there was no way to know. Hook squeezed his arm around her, sighed deeply, then turned around.  
"Where are you going?" Faith asked.  
"We're sailing into rough seas," he said, "I ought to take the helm for the time being. You should get back inside, there's a chance that a storm might hit."  
Faith made her way across the deck to the captain's quarters. Sailing had been smooth thus far, but Hook knew these waters better than anyone and she trusted his judgement of them.  
She had been sat with a book for an hour when Hook opened the door, a basket hung over his arm. Faith looked up, hopeful that he had been wrong about the seas becoming rougher ahead. She wanted to be with him. It didn't matter how or where. She would have happily read with him at her side in his quarters, or stood close by whilst he was at the helm. There was a comfort to his presence that Faith craved, a warmth to him that she needed.  
"I'm afraid things are looking worse than I thought." He announced, "there are still some frightful storms in the nearby areas... I thought you might find comfort in looking after these." He walked across the room and placed the basket upon the bed, allowing the cats to come out. "I'd recommend locking all of this." He waved his hand at the glass paned doors that enclosed his bookshelves, "and then hunkering down in bed with the curtains drawn. Boring, I know, but the curtains are heavy and should at the very least serve as some protection for your feline friends." Hook smiled encouragingly, and Faith nodded. She started to lock the bookshelves immediately. Hook picked up a shirt and coat from his wardrobe, dressing quickly so that he could return to his post in a timely fashion.  
"James." Faith called out softly, before he could shut the door on her once more. Hook turned around and crossed the room. He held his breath, waiting for her to speak up. If she were to ask him for anything, anything at all, he would have given it to her. His name, so seldom spoken aloud, felt safe on her tongue. When it had jumped from her mouth, the sound had utterly bewitched the man, and he had placed his heart securely within her hands. She could have asked him to stay with her in that room forever, forsaking his men and his ship, and he would have done so. But that was not her request "Please stay safe." Faith begged him.  
"I'll be fine, my dearest." He promised, "I swear it." He smiled and bent down to receive her sweet kisses. One upon the cheek, and another on his lips. They were all the strength that he needed to get through the storm. With that, Hook left his quarters, shutting the door behind him. Faith locked the last of the bookshelves and sat herself down on the bed. The last time she had sailed through a storm had been, she supposed, perhaps a little over two weeks beforehand. She had been Captain Blaine's prisoner. There had been no way for her to tell how much time had passed exactly in that small room, but two weeks felt like an adequate amount of time when she thought about it and tried to work it out. Faith felt like a lifetime had passed since she had first been thrown into that room. It was almost as if she was an entirely different person from the woman who had approached Ciaran Blaine and demanded he take her back to her captain. Even then, when she had no idea of what would come, she had thought of Hook as hers. The people of the tribe called him that too. It had rarely been the captain, or even Captain Hook. Instead he had so often been referred to as her captain. If he had been hers, even back then, then the previous night had made her his. That was what had changed, she was his now, she had chosen to be.  
Unsure of how long she would be alone in the Captain's quarters, Faith undressed down to her stockings and shift before seeking refuge on the bed behind the heavy curtains. The curtains blocked out a lot of light, so much that it took several minutes for her eyes to adjust to the darkness. Even then, all that she could really make out were the shadowy lumps that were the three cats. Faith arranged the blankets in such a way that they resembled a nest for them to curl up in, she hoped that this small barrier would help keep them secure when the Jolly Roger came face to face with the storm. She placed herself in the corner, pressing herself firmly against the wall, bracing herself for when the storm would try to throw her about. There was not much else for her to do but wait. Alone with the three cats, and her thoughts, Faith's mind darted between ideas and memories, good and bad, light and dark. It wasn't fair, she felt, that she had been forced to be away from Hook so soon after discovering what could exist between them.  
The storm was every bit as bad as Hook had expected it to be. Aggressive waves attempting to sink his ship, a sheet of rain impossible to see through. All he had was his strength, his wits, and trust that his ship could win this fight. His ship was unlike any other of its kind. Not just in size and speed, the Jolly Roger had thus far proved to be just as hardy and unbreakable as its captain. Grace had called it 'a gift from Neverland', she said that Neverland never took something without giving in return and Neverland had taken an awful lot from Hook. His ship may have been unsinkable, however his crew was not. During storms like these, he sent all but the strongest of men below deck for their own protection. Hook was always the last man to leave his post in a storm, he had to ensure his crew's safety. Each and every one of the men had made the choice to serve him, and Hook would rather die than prove himself unworthy. He held tight to the helm, forcing it to obey his will, keeping the Roger on track, refusing to be thrown off balance. He did not let go. His hand cramped, shoulders seized, back ached. Soaked hair clinging to his wet skin, obscuring his vision. He had to keep holding on, no one else could do it. He had to keep them safe. When the ship had finally cleared the storm, those few men still out on deck cheered and clapped for their captain who had led them safely through such dangers once more. Hook did not leave the helm until they were well out of the storm's reach. He signalled to lay anchor, needing some respite before continuing onwards. Inside the safety of his quarters, Hook threw off his coat and shirt and slumped into his chair at his desk. He fumbled with the metal clasp at his chest, but it wouldn't open. His hand was too sore and stiff. Hook closed his eyes, breathing deeply, trying to move past the pain. When he opened them again, Faith was quietly standing by him. Too exhausted for words, Hook took her hand and placed it clumsily over the clasp. He didn't need to ask for her assistance, she understood his needs. She understood him. She had known from the moment she had peeked around the edge of the curtain that Hook would need her. Like ancient warnings carved into stone, Hook's suffering was plainly written across his expression and posture. Faith's fingers pried the clasp loose, letting the strap fall across his chest. She helped Hook out of the remaining trappings of his prosthesis and laid it neatly on the desk. She then kissed his forehead and corralled the cats back into their basket. She didn't need to tell Hook that she would be leaving him for a moment, he knew that she would be returning the cats to their usual home, and he knew that she was doing it for his comfort. In the quiet of his quarters, Hook felt small. Shrunken by his own pain, the room seemed to expand around him. The distance between himself and his bed looked far too great for his stiff legs to travel alone. It was only when Faith returned, holding a large sheet of linen, that Hook's quarters returned to their usual size. Standing behind him, Faith held the fabric and squeezed the water from his hair. When his hair had been sufficiently dried, she moved down his torso, soaking up the remnants of the storm. Hook didn't say a thing, couldn't find the strength to make a sound fall from his tongue. He wanted to thank her, he wanted to express the sensation building in his chest. The warmth and fullness that came from having her care about him so deeply that she had done this for him. Faith rummaged through the wardrobe to find Hook something fresh to wear. The cabin was far too cold to have him sleep without the extra layer of warmth. He changed into the shirt and slops slowly, shivering from the chill that so often follows a storm. Faith took Hook carefully by the hand and brought him to bed. No words needed to be uttered, no silence needed to be broken, for Hook could read Faith perfectly.  
"You need sleep." Her hands said as they caressed his aching shoulders, Hook could not argue, but he could not sleep either. He didn't feel like it was possible. His pain was too great for that. So he remained hunched at the edge of the bed, making a feeble attempt at stretching his arms out and clenching his fist. Faith looked at him sympathetically, she knew pains like these from the times she had suffered most with her own maladies.  
"Captain." She said, breaking the silence and kneeling down before him, "let me help. Just relax, okay?" She took his hand in her own and started to massage it in the same way a physiotherapist had once taught her. firm, but gentle, carefully manipulating the joints to ease them back into comfortable movement. Hook's hand felt like ice in her own, an impressive feat considering how Faith was so often known for her own cold hands. She held on, and kept with her careful movements until she felt warmth return to him, "better?" She asked, moving to sit next to him. Hook nodded.  
"How did you learn that?" He asked, voice strained and rasping.  
"A physio-" Faith stopped, not knowing if Hook would know about physiotherapy, "a doctor showed me how when I was… not so well." She told him, "I had terrible pains, numbness, my hand often just didn't want to work… there were other things too, but sometimes massage could help."  
"You were sick?" He asked.  
"I'm not sure you would have heard of it…" Faith sighed and looked away, Neverland may have cured her, or at the very least had taken her symptoms away, but she still didn't like thinking about the toll being ill had taken on her.  
"Try me." Hook insisted.  
"They call it MS. Multiple sclerosis."  
"I-" Hook had no idea what he could say, Faith had been right in her assumption that he had never heard of such a thing.  
"It sucks." She said, plainly, "I was diagnosed young. The doctors said if I was lucky and took good care of myself I could still live a full, and normal, life." There was a bitter pause, doctors had told Faith many things. "Didn't work out that way." She finished. There was so much that she could have said, stories she could have told. But even thinking about the very edges of what had happened made her angry and sad.  
"But you're fine now?" Hook was confused. Despite the little she had said, it sounded bad. The way she had avoided talking about it made Hook wonder if it had perhaps affected her more than his own affliction had affected him. Yet the woman next to him appeared to be in fine health.  
"I guess Neverland healed me or something." She shrugged, "would have been right fucked if it hadn't." Faith shuddered, thinking of what might have come of her had she awoken on the beach with her usual chronic pain, the numbness in her limbs, needing her wheelchair, or at the very least- crutches. She was certain that she would not have made it far. She wouldn't have been able to escape Eli, she never would have been able to run through the forest, she wouldn't have found Hook. Hook looked at Faith sadly, he couldn't help but think about what Neverland had taken from her in return for giving her health. Had he known how Neverland had bestowed the gift of healing on her multiple times, he would have been horrified. Hook did not like Neverland's magic. It frightened him. There were rules to it, he had heard, a balance. For something to be given, another must be taken away. Faith had kept her lesser healings a secret, she had only ever tried to explain it to Alex before, and that was out of concern. Only to convince her that things would be okay. instinct had told Faith not to let people know. Especially not Hook, he wasn't ready to hear it. As she sat next to her aching captain, she wished that her gift could be used to ease the pains of others. He groaned with each small movement, unable to hide his discomfort. His back regularly ached from the weight of his hook, it so often felt like it had been engulfed in hellfire. He could usually ignore that pain. But the pains he suffered from taking charge in such unruly waters and dark storms were so much worse. All of that regular aching, but with added windchill and cutting rain. Even with Faith there with him, rubbing his shoulders and easing his muscles, the pain was almost too much to bear. With a small kiss upon the back of his neck, Faith was finally able to convince Hook to lay down and rest.  
"What are you going to do today?" He asked, Faith shrugged.  
"Read maybe, go help with the goats… I should probably get Yates, he might have something for the pain." She made a face, she didn't care for the physician at all. But as far as pirate physicians went, he was apparently one of the most skilled. Faith was sure that he would be furious about her being back, but she was more than willing to face his ire if it meant helping her captain. She had almost convinced herself that he wouldn't be quite so angry. After all, had she not left the ship to stay with the southern tribe, Yates would have been foisted off to another crew. In a roundabout way, it was because of her that he still had his job at all. It was a weak argument, but one she had to make to gain the bravery needed to face the man again. "Yeah, I'll get you something for the pain." She said, decisively. As she stood, Hook reached out for her hand.  
"Stay with me for a while longer." He pleaded. Faith sat at the edge of the bed, holding his hand. Although she had thought about reading, or doing anything with her day, she found that she did not have the heart to leave Hook. He had, after all, stayed with her whilst she slept after they had found each other again. Hook didn't sleep for long, he hardly ever did. Three or four hours every night was normal for him. It wasn't a choice, but something forced upon him. James Hook could hardly remember a time when he had not been plagued by nightmares. It had been so long since he had managed to get through a night without these horrors. It had been before he had lost his hand, for sure. Perhaps even before he had stepped foot in Neverland. He jolted awake after only an hour, his heart racing. Hook pushed himself up, still aching and feeling stiff. He wouldn't be getting sleep any time soon.   
"Feeling any better?" Faith asked him.  
"No." Hook growled  
"Anything I can do to help?"  
"Come closer." Hook shifted painfully across the bed, throwing his arm around Faith and pulling her to his side, her gentle presence was all he needed at that time. "When you sleep," he started, "what is it that you dream of, Faith?" There was a vulnerability to his question, made plain by the way he addressed her, no title or pet name. Faith looked into his eyes, thinking of how she could answer. She thought of the dreams she had when she was in the tribal village, so many had led to none other than Hook, himself.  
"I have dreams about a lot of things." She said, "a home, comfort, someone I could fall for, someone who might need me. I've dreamed of fighting, suffering, a man at the brink of giving up, fire and brimstone, being lost at sea… and sometimes of you." Hook grinned broadly.  
"You dream of me? My boyish charm and good looks must be leaving quite an impression on you." He paused and wiped a few strands of hair from Faith's face, "or was it my rippling muscles and manly strength that caught your attention?" Faith gave a look that did little more than egg Hook on. "Come on, my dear, let an old man know what it is that you see in him."  
"You have such wonderful curls" Faith twisted a thick lock of his hair around her finger. Hook raised an eyebrow, he didn't think his hair to be one of his more attractive traits. Too many greys, he thought, to be attractive. It didn't stop him from trying to take care of his hair, though. It was something his mother had been quite pushy about, when he had returned to her at last. Thirty-three years old, dark curls hanging loosely just passed his shoulders. His mother had been none too pleased with his new look.  
"You look like some kind of ruffian." She had insisted whilst tearing a comb through the knots and tangles in his hair. "And the beard!" She continued, don't your clients have a problem with it?"  
"They don't care what we look like as long as we get their products safely to their destinations. You should have seen one of the captains I worked with, tattooed head to toe…"  
"No, James. No tattoos."  
"Well not yet…" that comment landed Hook a slap around the ears. Later that evening, Hook's mother had given him a set of silver jars, each containing a different scented oil.  
"If my only son is going to have hair like that, then he will take care of it." She told him, before having him sit at her feet so she could apply the oils for him as if he were a young child again. Faith tugged lightly at the curl of hair, straightening it, then letting go so it bounced back into its usual shape. The last slither of bergamot scented oil still clung to the ends of Hook's hair, too little remained to travel across the room, but enough had kept hold to tease Faith's senses. She sighed and ran her fingers through the mass of dark curls and waves once more. She had always wished she could have hair with such striking qualities. Instead she had inherited her mother's dull, thin, straw-coloured hair. She couldn't imagine anyone ever running their hands through her own hair, it didn't have that sort of quality to it. At home she kept her hair in two french braids or wore it with a bandana or headband… anything to add interest. In Neverland she had little choice but to leave it down or in a loosely tied bun, she had not yet got the hang of using ribbon to tie her hair.  
"Is my hair really the only thing you like?" Hook pressed on, trying his luck.  
"There's a lot that I like about you." Faith said, "it's just hard to find the right words, you know?"  
"I know." Hook curled his body around Faith's, dreading the hour when he would have to stand at the helm once more.  
There was an intimacy between them that, to Faith, seemed to have appeared out of nowhere. In a way, it scared her. In the tribal village she often daydreamed about seeing Hook again. Then, when her life there had turned out to have been built on a foundation of lies, she had wanted to run away. She could have tried to find a way home, but when the opportunity arrived, she had sought out her captain. She hadn't thought about what would come after she had found him. She hadn't thought that things would be quite this way. It had taken her by surprise. For Hook, things could not have been more different. He had fallen into this intimacy like he would fall into a soft bed. He had seen it coming and had accepted it. He had once been afraid of what allowing these feelings to continue may lead to, but not any more. Having Faith by his side felt right, it felt comfortable. Faith stared at him, brows furrowed, both confused and fascinated by the concept of someone wanting her. Hook closed his eyes, finding some kind of brief respite from his pain in the darkness. His breaths became slow and deep, finally he had started to relax. Faith buried her face in his neck and placed a small kiss there. Hook let out a small moan.  
"Kiss me again." He purred. Faith pressed her lips firmly against his, her hand tangled in his hair. Hook reciprocated, gradually taking control, pushing past the burning in his shoulders and positioning himself on top of her. He placed a delicate kiss upon her forehead before leaving the bed.  
"Captain?" She asked  
"Time to get back to work." He stretched his back out with a groan.  
"Are you sure you have to? Your back-"  
"Will survive." The captain grimaced as he pulled on his hook. Faith rushed to him and took over securing the strap.  
"You're sure it will be okay?" She asked.  
"All I shall be doing is giving instructions." He said, "I need to be out there to make sure everything goes according to plan."  
"That's it?"  
"I promise. I have no desire to return to you any worse off than I am now, my beauty." He caressed her cheek before pulling on a loose shirt and stepping into his boots.  
"Is there anything you want me to do while you're gone?" Faith questioned, Hook thought for a second, then smiled.  
"The cats and their care are your responsibility." He paused, "and if you don't already know how, perhaps you could learn how to sew. A few of my shirts are in dire need of repair and I'd hate having to ask Smee right now."  
"I'm not great, my bubbe tried to teach me how to sew a few seams when I was younger…"  
"I'm a pirate, not a prince. Your skills will be more than adequate."  
It had been years since Faith had last held a needle and thread, and the tools she had used then were very different to the ones she held now. When she had ventured into the galley to feed the cats, she had asked Hugo about sewing equipment. The young Frenchman had handed her needles, linen thread, and a lump of bee's wax. Hugo was one of the few men who repaired his own clothes, having once been a tailor's apprentice in Paris- he was quite good at it too, but he absolutely refused to work on the captain’s clothes. The man, in his opinion, was far too picky. A nightmare.   
"You need to wax the thread." He instructed, seeing the confused look Faith had given him, "stops the thread from getting tangled." She could have done with more help than that, but hadn't realised it at the time. She stared at Hook's shirts, wondering where to start. One of them seemed like it would be better off being turned into scrap material, a large hole across the stomach and one sleeve hanging on by only a few threads. Faith huffed, and picked up a shirt that needed simpler repairs. A new hem, and a few small tears. A skilled tailor or seamstress could have mended all of Hook's shirts in a day, but Faith's technique was clumsy and slow. By the time Hook returned to his quarters, she had only finished the one. Her fingers were sore, red from holding so tightly to the tiny needle, and bleeding from the many pricks. Her stitches were not as neat as the ones produced by Mr. Smee's machine, but Hook did not mind. He took the shirt with a smile and thanked Faith with a kiss on the cheek.  
Sailing was far smoother over the coming days, the winds were strong and the ship was fast approaching its destination, Faith had heard little more about the matter with Mr. Smee and Hook didn't appear troubled by it either. She wondered if the matter had been settled privately, she had tried asking about it but Hook had been reluctant to say anything about the matter. Even Hugo, who was usually quite chatty, gave no real answers to her questions. It had come to the point where Faith had actually started to believe that whatever it was, was no big deal.  



	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n9Z98wrRnmw

A bell rung out. Dinner time. The crew was large enough that they ate in shifts, the most senior members first. Despite how rigidly adhered to this order often was, Hook did not think twice about putting Faith before himself in the line. Faith took her bowl of stew and bread rolls, then made her way to the very end of the long bench that had been pulled out in the galley. Hook sat next to her, occasionally looking up at Hugo, waiting for him to join. The galley filled with men and noise levels rose. Crude jokes and rambunctious laughter travelled up and down the table and benches. Hook talked animatedly to the men sitting opposite him, every so often glancing to the other end of the table where Mr. Smee had sat, purposely staying away from his captain. When Hugo finally took his place next to Mo, at the centre of the group talking with Hook, the captain raised an eyebrow.  
"So? Heard any more on the Smee front?" He prodded. Hugo looked awkwardly at Faith, unsure of how much he should divulge in front of her, then turned back at Hook.  
"I heard he's wanting to challenge you for your position. If you don't… you know…"  
"What do you think his chances are?" Hook looked to Mo.  
"He has a small, yet solid group who would back him. Noodler is Smee's man through and through. Yates obviously would vote his way, too. Cecco is with him, but he can be bought. Your biggest worry will be the swabbies." No spoke calmly and business-like, as if he was simply advising someone on what parts they needed to buy to repair a car.  
"The swabbies?" Hook was almost incredulous that a group of men so low down on the roster could be a threat to him.  
"There are too many of them to buy their votes." Mo explained, "But they do seem to have some sort of leadership who could perhaps sway them."  
"Leadership?" Hook questioned, taking a bite of bread.  
"Ol' Bobby Gold." A man who, judging by his tattoo's, Faith knew must be Bill Jukes chimed in, "'e's been out of sorts since 'e got in that mess and lost 'is job."  
"Surely then it would be Smee he's wanting rid of? It was that pious prick who got voted quartermaster in his place."  
"Nah, Gold likes 'im. Was Smee who recruited 'im in the first place, innit."  
"And he's still bitter about his leg." Hugo added.  
"It was his own damn fault for getting himself into that fight." Hook sighed, "I gave him his injury pay, offered him other jobs in the fleet, what else was I supposed to do? Fuck, at the time Owens wanted him for quartermaster on his own crew."  
"Gold is all bark and no bite." Mo spoke up again, "being quartermaster made him feel powerful, now he's looking for that power by riling up swabbies."  
"That much is obvious. How do we undo his work?" Hook asked.  
"You could try to raise his station, but a man like him isn't likely to be placated with anything less than absolute power."  
"And that's impossible." Hook sighed, frustrated with the conversation and turn of events. The men around him shared a look between them before returning to their food and light-hearted banter.   
Hook remained quiet throughout the evening, bent over his log books and notes, looking for anything that might help his situation. But Bobby Gold had a near perfect record. He had never stolen, or gambled beyond what small items were allowed. He’d never drawn a weapon against a crew mate whilst at sea. On a crew as large as the Jolly Roger, Gold’s perfect behaviour should have felt like a godsend, but Hook did not feel that way. The thing that he had taken away from this was that Gold had likely been manipulating those below him for a long time. It was absurd that he had done nothing worthy of note in any of the punishment logs. Even Hugo, the usually kind and mild cook, had received his fair share of punishments. Yet, somehow, Bobby Gold had gone unnoticed. Hook sighed, wishing he had sent the man off to another crew when he had first had the chance. Trust was everything to the captain when it came to choosing his crew and the people around him. He had taken on Gold because he had trusted the man, and whilst he was very good at his work on the ship, clearly he did not have the same respect for his captain and crew that they had shown him. Hook’s brow furrowed, the deep lines between his eyebrows became a tight and frustrated knot. Out of all the duties that came with being captain of a ship, managing the loyalty and temperaments of his men had always been the thing he struggled with most. Usually he would leave it to Mr. Smee to settle, but now he was the very problem that needed to be solved. Hook slammed one book shut and opened another, hoping this would be the one that would tell him what he wanted to hear.  
"Captain?" Faith said, quietly taking Hook’s attention away from what he was doing.  
"What is it, my dear?" He turned away from his notes.  
"What's going on? Why does Smee want to take over?" She had been confused all evening, the men had said a lot over dinner without really saying much at all. There had been details left out, she was sure of that, so she had no idea of what had led to this current state of affairs.  
"He's a self righteous little prick who likes to think he's still a priest and this crew is his flock." Hook left his place at his desk to join Faith on the sofa, he took her hand and squeezed it, deciding to tell Faith of the troubles brewing amongst his crew, "he doesn't like the fact that I'm getting so involved in matters concerning the southern tribe."  
"Alex…"  
"And you." Hook admitted, "as far as he's concerned you became one of them the moment I left you behind. Whatever they had planned for you is no business of ours and we should send you back to 'your people' as soon as possible. He thinks that if we don't, then the chief will see it as a betrayal and retaliate." He watched for Faith to give some kind of reaction, but her expression remained blank, "I won't send you back to them, not for anything." He assured her.  
"You could lose everything." Faith said, refusing to meet his gaze.  
"No. Not everything." He kissed Faith's hand and held it to his face. He couldn't possibly lose everything whilst he still had her. "Smee could take my place, take my crew, take my ship, but I will not allow him to take you. I've lost you once already, I'll be damned if it happens again." Faith drew her hand away from him. The intensity of Hook's feelings towards her made her uncomfortable. She didn't understand them, it was too fast. He hardly knew her, how could he be so sure that she was worth all of this trouble? Hook looked at her, his tired eyes trying to peer into her mind to see what she was thinking. He knew that something was troubling her, he could feel it. Like her troubles had caused the atmosphere around her to grow heavy. "My dear?" He prompted, "what ever is the matter?"  
"All of this…" she waved her hand vaguely in the air, "the troubles, the tension. I'm not worth it. It would be best for you, for everyone perhaps, if you gave me back-"  
"No." Hook said, "I won't do it. I have made my choice."  
"But am I worth it, though? How can you be so sure? You hardly know me…" Faith argued.  
"Neverland has given me many things." Hook started, looking Faith in the eyes, "it has thrown many things in my way, not all of them good. I have seen enough, lived through enough to know what is worth it, to know what is worth fighting for!" He paused, letting out a frustrated sigh, "believe me when I say that you are the most precious thing this life has ever bestowed upon me."  
"But-"  
"I don't know you?" Hook said, repeating the line that Faith threw his way when feeling insecure, "No, I don't know all of your past, or your family, I may never know your life before coming here. But I know enough to make my choice. I know your kindness, your bravery, your resilience. I know your intelligence and sense of humour. I know your strengths and your weaknesses. And I know how you make me feel, damn it! Do not insult my intelligence nor my character by insisting that I do not know you. If you still think it to be so, then perhaps it is you who does not know me."  
"I'm sorry, captain." Faith muttered after a few moments of tense silence. Hook nodded and gave her hand a squeeze before returning to his desk and work. As usual, Hook did not sleep much that night. He spent most of the nighttime hours simply laying next to Faith, looking at her and thinking about what their relationship might actually be. He had always rejected the notion of soulmates, he didn't like the idea of someone being chosen for him, didn't like the lack of free will that it implied. Yet there was something about Faith that just felt right, like she had been made for him. Made for him like the bread that nourished him, the air that breathed life into his lungs, the sun that warmed him, and the stars that guided his way. There had been a hole in his soul that he hadn't even noticed until she came along and slotted into it so perfectly. In such a short time Faith had already become so precious to him. Hook had been scared of it before and that had caused him to act in ways that he was not proud of, but he was not scared anymore. What he felt now was just as real as anything he had felt before. He had chosen this. He felt sure of that. If it had indeed been destiny that they would meet, it had been choice that led them to this exact point. Even now Hook was making a choice, choosing the woman who slept in his bed. He could have easily given in to Mr. Smee and taken her back to the tribe. He could have made that choice. Faith could have tried to get home, but she had chosen him instead. When she had made the choice to leave him, she could have chosen something different. Perhaps destiny had lit the spark, but it had been the choices they had made that had kept the embers burning. Hook sighed and wrapped his arm around Faith. He closed his eyes, trying to let sleep take him once more.  
A thin slither of light seeped through the crack in the bedside curtains. Hook was awake, he had been awake for a while. He had left his bed, cleaned himself up, got dressed, and had eaten some breakfast before Faith had started to stir. She pulled back the curtains cautiously, although Hook had not exactly seemed angry the night before there had been some tension that had left Faith feeling nervous.  
"Good morning, my dearest." Hook greeted her, peering over the book in his hand. He smiled, he was not angry, but Faith still felt unsure. The words spoken the night before still hovered in the air around her with the unfamiliar feeling of being wanted.  
"Morning." She said softly, stretching her arms above her head. She commenced her morning routine in silence. The morning was almost like any other. Faith washed her face, and combed her hair just like always, but it was different this time. Hook was there, watching her eagerly. When she opened the wardrobe to take out her clothes, he spoke up once more.  
"Hold on a moment." Hook said. He walked over to a large chest nearby and opened it, "we'll be in port soon and, well, I was thinking that maybe you might like to wear something a tad nicer than your working clothes." Faith raised an eyebrow. He pulled a printed cotton gown from the chest. Simple, cream with forest green stripes, followed by a dark petticoat. Faith held the gown in her hands, she had never felt cotton so fine in her life.  
"It's beautiful." She said, "thank you."  
"There's one more thing." Hook told her, diving back into the chest and retrieving a new pair of stays, "Valentine tells me that this style was very popular amongst the women in Port Royale last time he was there."  
Faith took hold of the stays, the front was heavily boned, and the only set of laces ran up the back.  
"I'm not sure I'll be able to get these on." She sighed, pressing the stays against her torso.  
"Most women have some help. A maid, a husband-"  
"A handsome pirate?"  
"An old pirate would be more accurate, if you were talking about me, my dear."  
"Old? You're thirty-eight, that's hardly old at all."  
"I was thirty-eight when I came here. There's no real way to tell how old I am now." Hook crossed the room to where the mirror and wash basin were, he stared at his reflection intently and sighed. "I certainly have more grey hairs than I did back then, and these lines…" his fingers passed around his eyes and trailed over the deep creases between his eyebrows. The aging process in Neverland was strange. Children grew up, they grew up slowly, but they grew all the same. Adults on the other hand, they all stopped aging eventually. There was no pattern to it, they just stopped. Some people stayed young and supple, twenty-one for the rest of their days, others made it into their eighties and beyond. Those people who arrived in these strange shores could find themselves forever the age that they had been when they first laid eyes upon the mysterious land, others would find themselves growing older for a while longer.  
"You're handsome no matter what age you might be, captain." Faith said tenderly, her face warming with the rush of blood flooding her cheeks. She wasn't usually so bold. Hook made a face, almost a scowl, pursing his lips. He didn't quite like it when she called him 'captain', didn't like the distance that it implied existed between them. He had given himself to her, all that he was and all he could be belonged to her, only ever being called 'captain' felt like a rejection. Like she couldn't accept the deepest parts of who he was. He knew it was irrational, he knew it wasn't her intent. She was shy, in such unfamiliar territory, he knew this. It still hurt.  
"You flatter this old man, dearest. How about we get you laced up, eh?"   
Faith slipped her arms through the straps of the stays and held the front tight to her body. Hook took a blunt wooden needle and held it between his teeth, carefully threading a long lace through its eye. He passed the lace through each of the eyelets in a tight spiral pattern before knotting the end with his teeth and tucking it away. He then produced a curved piece of wood that had been engraved with an intricate floral pattern from the chest, and asked Faith to turn around. He slid the wood into a pocket in the inner lining of the front of the stays.   
"It's so beautiful… shame no one will really see it." Faith ran her hand down the length of the busk from the outside, barely feeling the bumps from the pattern at all.  
"Some women like to have their lover's name or initials engraved onto their busks." Hook said as an aside, a banal fact that he had given without thinking about the implications that it came with before saying it aloud.  
"Do you think there would be enough space on this one?" Faith asked  
"What?" Hook was taken aback by the question.  
"To have your name added?" She clarified, feeling awkward, "or is it more a thing for like husbands? We've not really been together long at all and I don't want to put you on the spot…" she bit nervously at her bottom lip, sure she had said something wrong. Obviously they weren't 'there'. How could they be? Even with time in Neverland being as strange as it was, they had not been together long at all. It was still early days. Anything could happen. It bothered Faith more than she would admit, that she was falling so fast. It was so unlike her to be this way over a man, over anyone. Hook, on the other hand, was not at all bothered. He was proud, in fact, to finally find himself worthy of such feelings.  
"I'm sure we could find the space. If that is what you truly want. It's not as if my name is particularly long after all, just-"  
"James." Faith finished Hook's sentence for him.  
"You really want to keep a part of this old man so close to your heart?"  
"I think I do."  
"Because you care for me?" He asked.  
"Yes."  
"And you feel… affectionate towards me?" He inched closer to Faith, trying to keep his expression neutral, hiding the fluttering feeling within his stomach. He had not yet asked her about the nature of her feelings towards him. As strongly has Hook felt, even he would admit that it was perhaps too soon to expect a lot. He knew Faith, he had started to learn her ways from the moment they had met, he knew how guarded she was with her feelings. She kept them so securely hidden away that sometimes she couldn't even see them herself. Faith took a deep breath, she felt almost afraid of saying the words.  
"Yes, I feel affectionate towards you."   
"Do you really mean it?" Hook asked hopefully.  
"Of course I mean it!" She said, winding her fingers around Hook's calloused hand, "you mean so much to me." Her words though seemingly shallow and awkward were but a gateway to far deeper feelings. Faith had never been too comfortable when it came to talking about her feelings. She always found herself stuck for words, her mind jumping between concepts that felt impossible to articulate. And then there was the fear. Fear of judgement, fear that her feelings were not justified, fear that she was wrong. The deepest truth was that she felt that there was something far greater than just affection between herself and the pirate. There had once been a time that she had longed to escape him and return to her home. As it was, though, it had come to the point where Faith could no longer imagine herself without him. In such a short time Hook had ensured his place within her heart. Faith did not know what her future would be, but she was sure that Hook would be a part of it. 


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qZS-B1Afc1c

Blackfort Isle was as quiet as ever when the ship finally approached the harbour boundaries. The fort it had taken its name from stood formidably near the shore, waves crashing against it’s outer walls. Hook’s heart always started to beat faster when he saw it, so much had happened there before. He had left Faith to finish dressing alone, in peace. He hadn't wanted to leave her. He had wanted to stay and hear more small words of affection, but she still felt nervous being in a state of undress around him. So he had left, basking in the warmth of the affection she had placed upon him. It had been so long since he had last felt that way, not since Charlotte. He had loved Charlotte with all of his heart, but it had ended badly. Hook did not like thinking about her and what had happened between them, but sometimes he couldn't help it. He knew that one day he would have to tell Faith about the woman he once loved, how could he not? Charlotte and the relationship they had once had, had played perhaps the biggest part in making Hook the man he had become. He stretched a little and began pacing the deck, the heels of his boots making their distinctive clicking noise amongst the young, bare footed men loading longboats with cargo to take over to the island. Mr. Smee stood in the centre, checking the cargo boxes against a list. He nodded curtly as Hook passed. As adversarial as their working relationship had become, Mr. Smee was not bold enough to show such disrespect towards the captain where all could see.  
"Smee, make a note to stop at the still, have them fill our liquor stores with the finest they have to offer." Hook said, just loudly enough for the surrounding men to hear, "on my coin, of course." He added, drawing a worn leather pouch from his pocket and tossing it towards the quartermaster. Mr. Smee scowled, he could see the captain's intentions. Sway the numbers with booze, treasures, and whores. He knew this tactic because he had helped employ it in the past. It was strange that Hook was doing this work himself, though, usually he would have someone close to him pay others off privately. It wasn't usually a good move for the captain to show off his wealth or power so openly. Many of the crew could be bought onto one side of a dispute quite easily if they were offered the right things, however these were proud men and they did not like to feel as if they were being bought. It was one thing for a senior crew member to sit a man down and ask what the captain could do to get them on side, it was another thing completely for the captain to just throw booze and riches to those dissatisfied crew members. Hook knew this, and Mr. Smee knew that he did, which made the captain's actions all the more peculiar. The Irishman gave one last suspicious look towards his captain before returning to the yellowing pages of his stock lists. Hook continued weaving through the men, stopping when he came before the youngest of the crew.   
Since joining, Tootles had grown considerably. Hook supposed that it was regular, hearty meals to blame for the boy's growth. That and Neverland's strange magic. Although bigger than he had ever been, Tootles was still not strong enough to do the same chores as many of the other men. He struggled with a barrel of gunpowder, small arms shaking, barely able to tip it onto its side, let alone lift it. Hook chuckled.  
"Here lad," he said, Tootles stopped immediately, "you're going about it all wrong. Lift from your knees. Like this." Hook demonstrated with a considerably larger and heavier barrel, heaving it up and towards his chest. He placed it back down carefully, not wanting it to get mixed up with the items to be taken over for trade. "Give it a try." He encouraged the boy. Tootles did not seem convinced, he scrunched up his face and took hold of his barrel just like Hook had shown him, bracing his arms around the rough wooden structure. It took a few attempts, the young boy's nervous hands kept losing their grip, but on the fourth try Tootles succeeded in lifting the barrel. Hook gave him a proud and encouraging nod before moving further down the deck. It was a pleasant day, warm with the clearest of blue skies above. A fine breeze moved through Hook's hair, making it dance over his shoulders with the careful footsteps of a skilled performer. Then there she was, standing across the deck, wearing the new dress with her hair pinned up. Hook's heart stopped, Faith looked like the perfect lady. Like she should have been managing a fine household somewhere with an equally fine husband, not surviving on a pirate ship surrounded by sailors and curling up to the likes of himself every night. It was as she turned to fully face him that Hook became acutely aware of the way that some of the other men were eyeing her. Faith did not own a fichu or any sort of suitable kerchief to lay across her chest, and the lower neckline of her gown exposed the plump curves of her breasts for all to see. Seeing the looks that Faith was receiving made him nervous. There was already tension amongst the crew, and Hook didn't doubt that if one of Mr. Smee's men liked what he saw- he would almost certainly try to use Faith to get back at him. Hook didn't much care for the tattoos that Grace had applied on Faith's thighs. They were striking to look at, but he did not trust their protective qualities. The magic that Grace performed was never simple. With rules that could not be known, and consequences of which there could be many, in Hook's mind that kind of magic was always dangerous. He crossed the deck swiftly and with purpose. Up close, Faith's ladylike appearance was even more apparent. She had put on powder and rouge, and had even darkened her eyebrows. The only thing that gave away her position in Neverland were the rows of pearl earrings that adorned the outer rims of her ears. Hook wrapped his arms around her tightly and lifted her onto a tall crate. Faith didn't have the time to adjust her skirts around her new seat before Hook's lips were pressed forcefully against her own, his hand at her jaw. He kissed her like there was no one watching, precisely because there were people watching. Faith was his, and any man who tried to get to her would meet his hook. He pulled away slowly, and glared in the direction of the men standing at the helm.  
"What was that about?" Faith asked, face still aglow from his kiss.  
"Thought I might give them something more thrilling to stare at." Hook replied, taking his coat off, "they had been quite preoccupied with your chest." He placed the coat over Faith's shoulders. She pulled the edges closed across her chest and sighed.  
"I can't wear this."  
"Why ever not?" Hook stepped back, trying to find whatever fault Faith had found in the garment. As far as he was concerned it covered her fine.  
"Captain, you're a bloody giant, you've got to be… what?... Six-five? Six-six? Look, my fingers don't even reach the cuffs!" Faith threaded her arms through the sleeves and jumped off of the crate to show him just how awkward it looked.  
"Yes. Well. It will at least preserve your modesty until something else can be done about it." Faith pouted, it was hot and humid and she already had so many layers on.  
"Surely it won't matter that much if I'm with you the whole time." She said sweetly, "You really think anyone would be brave enough to leer at Captain Hook's woman when he's right there next to her?" She had said the exact thing to get her way. In calling herself Hook's woman, Faith could have got anything she wanted from the pirate.  
"No, I don't suppose they would dare be quite so disrespectful." He agreed, Faith swiftly removed the coat and handed it back to its owner. Hook forced his arms into the long, cuffed sleeves with some considerable effort. To an untrained eye it would seem that he had no issues at all living with just one hand, he had adapted remarkably well and he had had a very long time to learn and relearn how to do things. He could tie knots using his teeth as quickly and securely as any other man aboard could do so with both of their hands, he could draw a sword and fire a pistol. His penmanship was precise with a flare of elegance. From an outsider's perspective Hook wasn't hindered in the slightest. The only thing that would give it away were his clothes and the way that he dressed. Hook's shirts were all just that bit oversized to slide over the hook and attached leather harness, nor were there any closures to conceal the deep slashed neckline running down his chest. His breeches, although sized correctly, had a loose look to them. It was impossible for him to fasten the small columns of buttons at his knees one handed. If weather conditions demanded it and he had to have the extra layer of warmth that woolen stockings provided, he would often be seen tugging at them throughout the day. The small buckles of stocking garters were far too fiddly to be handled by a single, rather large hand. On the mornings that she woke up early, Faith had slipped easily into the place of helping her captain dress. It had been strange, at first, to share such an intimacy. Hook had not accepted, had not wanted, any help with such basic tasks ever since the day he had taken the bandages off of his right arm all those years ago. It was different with Faith though, she didn't do it because she thought that he wasn't capable, she did it because she cared about him. Unlike Hook, Faith found it difficult to put words to her feelings, instead her affection was written in her actions. The pleats she made at his sides when tucking his shirt into his breeches, carefully turning his sleeves up so they wouldn't fall down, the way her fingers ran past his knees, across the edge of his breeches to make sure the buckles weren't too tight. And now she stood before him, on the tips of her toes, reaching up and tugging lightly at his coat so that it fell evenly over his shoulders and chest. Hook smiled, as much as the men teased him about it in private, and as much as he would deny it when they did, he liked when Faith fussed over him.   
"Captain." The small voice of Tootles interrupted the moment, "there's a boat all loaded, if you ready to go." He gave his captain an awkward bow before leaving. Hook had told the boy over and over that it wasn't necessary, but sometimes he forgot. Tootles had spent so long listening to the stories that Wendy, Peter Pan, and Tinkerbell told about Hook's cruelty and evil nature that there remained a part of him that was afraid of the captain. The thing that frightened him most though, was the possibility of Hook banishing him from the crew and sending him back to Peter Pan. That was why he sometimes continued to bow, he had convinced himself that if he would always show that level of respect to the captain he would be safe. It wasn't helped by the men who found it funny, and therefore encouraged the behaviour. During his first few weeks on the ship, Tootles would cry at night and a particularly cruel pirate had turned to him with a false warning.  
"Captain Hook hates boys who cry, if you don't stop it soon he'll give you straight back to Pan." Of course this had only made the boy cry more, and had fuelled his fears like nothing else could. Even the reassurances from Hugo, Smee, and the captain himself, that he would never do such a thing did not settle the boy's mind. There were times, however, when Tootles would forget his fears. Men drinking on the deck at night, the captain joining them for some rum and some card games. Tootles wouldn't drink, but he did know a thing or two about playing cards. On more than one occasion he had destroyed Hook in a game, and had enjoyed himself. He did like the captain, even more so after Hook had given him a few chocolate discs as his winnings. But in the morning, when there was work to be done, and everything was far less relaxed, Tootles dropped straight back into his fear guided mannerisms.   
Shaking his head slightly at the boy's bowing, Hook took Faith by the hand, leading her to the first longboat, and making sure she was safely sat within its confines before getting in himself and allowing a small number of other men to join them.  
The island was quiet, it was always quiet. But as Hook stepped foot into the small square where the work buildings were concentrated, he noticed something off. It wasn't uncommon for places to be closed. It was, however, highly suspect that all of the workers seemed to be closing up at the exact same time. He placed his right arm firmly at Faith's waist, keeping his left hand at the hilt of his blade. Something was not right and he would be ready to meet any attack that may come.  
"With me, my dear." Hook said, "Carefully."  
"What's wrong?" Faith asked  
"I'm not sure." Hook led Faith past the square to the building where Vic lived and worked. Just like everywhere else on the island, the only thing that Hook found was quiet. There was no rhythmic banging of a hammer against leather and metal studs, even the chattering of Vic's young apprentices was missing. Hook's fist crashed against a door. No answer. Hook knocked again, repeatedly.  
"Maybe he's not there." Faith suggested. Hook shook his head and continued his knocking.  
"Vic!" He called out, "I swear to God, if you do not get your arse down here quickly, I'll kick your fucking door down!" He knocked some more before deciding to make good on his threat and thrust his boot into the door. It swung open, revealing a dark and empty room. Hook stepped inside, calling out to the man again. Faith remained by the door, she knew that Hook was a very strong man, but seeing his strength in action was still quite shocking. His strength was not clumsy either, he had moved with precision that had kept the heavy door on its hinges, only the lock had been broken. She supposed that Hook must have kicked many doors down in his lifetime to have achieved this result so easily. She peered into the house, Hook had walked past the stairs and into a room in the back, leaving her alone. He hadn't thought, he had been so focused on finding Vic that the potential danger had slipped his mind. He walked further into the house, to a small storage room at the back when he heard a creak coming from upstairs. Faith had heard it, too.  
"Captain!" She called out from the doorway, "I don't think we should be here. I don't think it's-" her sentence was cut off by a rough hand over her mouth. She struggled against the man's grip but it was too strong. Faith was manhandled and dragged to a dark corner just past the tree line. Her attacker had stayed behind her the whole time, keeping her arms firmly at her back and ensuring that she could not identify him until he wanted it.  
A group of men stood around, leaning against the trees, looking down on her. The man holding her pushed her to the ground.  
"Leverage." He said. Faith turned around, face full of disgust.  
"Who the fuck are you?" She spat out. The man laughed and limped closer to her. It was then that Faith noticed the wooden stump sticking out of his left trouser leg and knew who he must be.  
"Bobby Gold." He extended a hand, that Faith rejected, "I don't believe we've had the chance to be acquainted. What with Hook keeping such a close eye on you." He limped closer still, "get up." He ordered.  
"Fuck you," she hissed, "what do you want with me?" She remained stubbornly in place on the ground. Gold smiled sadistically.  
"We're gonna send the captain a little message, a warning of what could come if he doesn't get in line." He lowered himself precariously down on one knee, "what better way to send such a message than by using his little whore?" He pulled a knife from his pocket and ran the flat side across Faith's chest. He had sought to scare her, but instead of being scared Faith had started to laugh. He didn't know about her protections, there was nothing that he, or any of the men around could do to hurt her.  
"What's so fuckin' funny?" One of the younger men asked.  
"I mean, the fact that you think this will get you anywhere is pretty fucking funny." Faith said, still laughing, "go on. Cut me. I dare you." Bobby Gold tightened his grip around the knife and turned the sharp edge towards Faith's skin, then inexplicably the knife fell from his hand. He tried again, and again, but every attempt yielded the same results. The younger man groaned.  
"You been drinking?" He asked Gold in a disapproving tone, "let me do it." He snatched the knife up and made an attempt to cut Faith. He too found the task impossible. He took the knife by the blade and began wiping the handle against his breeches.  
"It's not the knife, you pissing berk." Gold said  
"Like fuck it's not!"  
"It's her. He must've taken her to that witch. Check her legs." The young man pushed Faith back and yanked her skirts up far enough to see the tattoos upon her thighs. He had seen similar markings on some of Ethel's girls and knew what they meant.  
"What now?" He asked his leader.  
"No man can harm her, aye?" Gold said, eyebrow raised, "so we don't have a man do the job." He turned around and limped towards the small crowd of men, pushing them aside until he found what he was looking for. He grabbed Tootles by the shoulder and directed him towards Faith. "Time to prove your loyalty, boy." He thrust his knife into the boys shaking hand and gave an approving nod. Tootles approached Faith apprehensively. He looked around at the surrounding men, searching for some sort of instruction of what he should do next. Gold stepped in, taking Tootles by the wrist and guiding his hand towards Faith's chest. The knife quivered in the boy's small hand.  
"I can't do it." Tootles insisted, his voice cracking.  
"It's easy." Gold encouraged him, "nice and slow, a clean cut just like gutting a fish."  
"I don't want to, she's nice to m-"  
"Just do it!" Gold yelled, Tootles closed his eyes tightly and pressed the tip of the knife into Faith's skin. She yelped, but it was not the knife's prick that had startled her. Almost as soon as it had pierced through the delicate skin across her breast a rock had flown past her face, catching her cheek as it did so, and had landed at the base of Gold's throat. The old man coughed and staggered backwards. Then another rock came flying from behind a tree, hitting him in the side of the head. One of the men ran to his aid but had been pushed aside. Bobby Gold was infuriated, he rushed towards her, knocking Tootles aside.  
"What the fuck are you?" He demanded, "some kind of witch? Like her?" If Faith had replied, he wouldn't have been able to hear, for another rock had found its target- this one knocking the man unconscious. The other men started to panic, they started shouting and arguing about what to do, and in the panic they had forgotten to keep a close eye on Faith. As soon as she had noticed that not a single set of eyes were on her, she had darted towards the thicker growth of trees. As she ran, a hand reached out and took hold of her wrist.  
"What are you doing here?" Alex whispered urgently. She looked as vibrant as ever, albeit dressed very differently to the last time Faith had seen her. Alex now stood before her in an ill fitting pair of breeches and a baggy men's shirt  
"We came to find you." Faith whispered back, "but something's not right here." She added, pressing her fingers against the small cut that Tootles had left upon her chest. She knew it would heal, but was desperate for the bleeding to stop before the trail reached her dress. If Hook saw it, then she would have to tell him what happened and the young boy would likely pay dearly for having taken part in whatever that was. She looked downwards to see the damage for herself and groaned. Although the bleeding had stopped, and it had not reached her dress, she would still need to find somewhere to clean up.   
"Come with me." Alex nodded in a direction back towards Vic's home, "stay quiet." She warned. They crept out towards a small beach where Alex had set up camp. She sat beneath her tent and poured some water into a clay bowl, then motioned for Faith to join her. "So what was that about?" She asked, breaking the silence at last and gesturing to Faith's bloodied chest.  
"Some of the men are trying to overthrow Hook… they thought they could use me to get back at him or something." Faith sighed, cleaning the blood and exposing the new scar the knife had left behind, "what's going on here?"  
"I don't know." Alex said, shaking her head, "a few weeks ago two ships showed up and some men came down to talk with the workers here. There was some fighting, but then they struck some kind of deal… it reminded me of the times the chief would meet with pirates in secret."  
"Well, that’s not good." Faith said, standing up, “Hook needs to know about this.” Alex nodded in agreement. She had never met the man before, but was sure that if anyone could get to the bottom of things, it would be Captain Hook.  
The pair walked across the beach, heading back to where Faith had last seen her captain. She hoped that he was still nearby, but the sinking feeling in her stomach told her otherwise. Vic's home was as empty as it had been earlier. Faith swore loudly and called out for Hook, but just as she feared he was long gone.  
"Fuck. Fuck. Where the fuck could he be?" She said, banging her fist against a wall. Alex crouched down, examining a mark in the ground.  
"He went this way." She said, pointing west, "I don't think he was alone either. Look." She pressed her fingers into the grass and traced a line, "see? These have to be his boot prints, he's a big man, leaves deep prints, but this here- he was dragging something or someone." Alex stood up and started to follow the prints, Faith trailed behind unable to keep up with her swift pace.   
"How the hell are you moving so fast?" Faith asked, pushing a thorny branch away from her face.   
"Stay quiet." Alex hissed back, "listen. He's close." Faith crept closer to Alex and tried to listen for whatever it was that she had heard, but all her untrained ears could pick up were the sounds of their own breathing. Alex nodded in a direction to their right and set off once more, keeping close to the ground and quiet as a cat stalking its prey.  
"Where is she?" Faith heard Hook ask someone urgently.  
"Who? I don't know what you're talking about." A man replied between heavy breathes. Then came the sound of a thud and the man choking like he had just been punched in the throat. Faith didn't think before rushing past Alex and towards the sounds. She pushed through a thin layer of nettles and found herself standing before a large storage shed often used by those who worked nearby. Hook loomed over Vic, fist raised in anger.  
"Now tell me-" Hook started once more.  
"Captain!" Faith interrupted him, rushing forwards whilst Alex stayed behind her, "I-"  
"You're safe." Hook squeezed Faith's hand and smiled briefly before seeing the small spot of blood on her cheek that had been left by one of Alex's rocks, "no." He said, "you were hurt. What happened?" He asked the question gently, seeing Faith alive and well had dissipated his rage.  
"It was me." Alex admitted, stepping forward, "an accident, I swear. I couldn't think of another way to get them away from her." She looked down, unable to meet Hook's intense gaze.  
"Get who away?" Hook prompted.  
"The men. They wanted to hurt her." Alex kept her eyes on the ground below.  
"It was Gold and some of his men." Faith said, "he thought if he could hurt me then you might think twice about standing against him."  
"I told you I had nought to do with it, you sodding fool!" Vic choked out from behind.  
"Perhaps not." Hook said, "but I am sure you have something to do with the strangeness surrounding this place right now." He crouched down next to Vic, holding the tip of his hook beneath the man's chin and raised his eyebrows, expecting an explanation to come quickly. Vic glared at the captain, and resigned himself to explaining what he knew.  
"The governor." Vic said, "sent some of his thugs here a few weeks back offering every man working here double what you pay for our services… as long as we cut all ties with you pirates."  
"Bastard!" Hook growled, "and that's it? Governor waves some gold in front of your faces and you all decide to betray me?" The tip of his hook pressed harder against Vic's chin, "fucking cowards, the lot of you!"  
"It's not like that!" Vic pleaded, "we refused. At first. Then they started burning our supplies! They took my wife! And my son!"  
"Did anything else happen?" Hook asked, Vic sighed.  
"When they were sure of our cooperation, they just left. Looked like they were heading south, fuck knows why." Hook stood up and began pacing around. He had problems with the Governor and his thugs before. The Governor was no fan of pirates, and had tried many times to end Neverland's piracy and take that power for himself.   
"Your son!" Alex half shouted, "was he born here?" Her eyes were wide and full of fear.  
"Why do you want to know?" Vic asked  
"Was he born here?" She repeated, "it's important." Faith understood what she meant. If Vic's wife had experienced a healthy pregnancy in Neverland, then the chief of the southern tribe would be very interested in her and her child. Vic shook his head.  
"Those bastards asked questions about him, too. Didn't answer a damn thing." He spat on the ground, half out of his disgust at the governor's thugs, half to deal with the bleeding from where his lip had been torn. "But, no. He's not ours by blood, though. We found him years ago, decided to take him in." Vic grimaced in pain, Hook had hit him hard, his jaw was swelling up and bruising had started to spread across his cheek, "why was it so important that you know?"   
"Because I think I know where they are." Alex said, "an island south of here, with my people." Hook stopped pacing.  
"We'll find them, bring them back to you." He assured his old friend. Vic got to his feet unsteadily, shaking his head.  
"You say that as if I'll be staying behind like a useless old man. I'm coming with. You owe me that much."  
"I owe you?" Hook snorted.  
"You beat the living daylights out of me over something I had nought to do with, yeah I'd say you owe me." Vic tried to get up, but fell straight back down. Hook sighed and offered the man his hand, pulling him to his feet. Vic nodded in thanks, but didn’t say much more. He was far more concerned about what would happen if the other workers from the isle saw him being so friendly with Hook. They had all, eventually, taken the Governor’s offer. He had, technically, not. So Vic kept quiet, not even daring to look at the captain, thinking that his demeanour and injuries could convince the others he had been taken by force. The men of the island would gladly kill anyone they believed was a traitor. They had done far worse for far less. Vic had nothing but his life left and he would be damned if he would lose it by being as foolish as openly going against the wishes of the workers.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yzup8j-Ifzk

The atmosphere aboard the Jolly Roger was tense. The crew were unhappy with the outcome of their trip to the island, and even more so at the prospect of housing two newcomers. Bobby Gold and his men stood to the back, sharing uneasy looks, their scheme had failed and Hook would not let them go unpunished. Even Mr. Smee with his status and power amongst the crew could not save them from the captain's wrath. Usually retribution and punishment came swift and harsh, but, this time Hook had brushed past them. His mind was preoccupied on other things. Rumbles of distant thunder grew amongst the crew as they whispered about their lack of trade. The risk of depleting supplies was enough to send even the most hardened of sailors into a panic, and panic they did.  
"Captain." They called, followed by unending questions, talking over one another until there were no words- just noise.  
"Silence!" Hook bellowed, he was immediately obeyed, "all officers are to gather in my quarters. Everyone else, just find something to do." Again, he was obeyed immediately and without question. Hook stormed into his quarters, followed by his officers. As soon as the door closed behind them, the deck started buzzing with the sound of whispers and more questions. Faith tapped Alex on the shoulder and nodded to the stairway that led below deck to the galley, where Hugo would be. She did not want to stay out in the open where Gold and his men were watching.   
Hugo, having not left the galley, was none the wiser to anything that had transpired over on the island. He stood quite contently, over his stove, stirring his stew and humming to himself.  
"God, I love this ship." He said, hearing Faith's footsteps approaching, "other ships, too dangerous to have something like this. Not here though, nothing brings 'the Roger' down." He tapped the side of his stove like a used car salesman might tap a car's roof when trying to make a sale. He turned around to greet Faith, expecting to at least see her usual amused grin that came with his declarations of love for his ship and craft. Instead he was met with a frown drawn upon two faces. "You must be the girl." He extended his hand for Alex to shake, but it was ignored, "thought you'd be a bit more cheerful." He muttered. Faith opened her mouth to give some sort of explanation, but she didn't know where to start. "What's wrong?" Hugo demanded, "you're starting to scare me."  
"You should be scared." Alex said. Hugo laughed, sure that they were playing some kind of joke on him.  
"Good one!" He laughed, "you almost had me." He looked up, the women were not laughing with him.  
"It's no joke. Something bad is happening." Faith said, "Hook is furious."  
"Well, what is it?" He probed.  
"I don't know exactly. Something to do with the governor, whoever that is, and the southern tribe." Faith said, "oh and Gold tried to attack me, so that's a thing that happened."  
"He did what?!" Hugo sat himself on one of the low stools, "captain is going to fucking kill him."  
"I hope not." Faith sighed, taking a seat on one of the other stools, "seems like the sort of thing Smee might use against him, you know?"  
"Fuck." Hugo sighed, "You're right." He pushed a lock of blond hair behind his ear and turned to Alex, "you hungry?" He asked.  
"Very." She replied, "there wasn't much food over there."  
"Not much food?" Hugo scoffed, "we give them enough to last entire seasons and then some!"  
"I tried to stay away from the people, I didn't want to risk being taken away on one of those ships." She explained.   
"Wait. What? Taken away?" Hugo was growing more and more confused with every new piece of information. He stood up and began slicing some bread, "you're going to have to tell me what's been happening." He said, spreading jam over the bread. Alex told him all about the ships she had seen turn up at the island, the men who had disembarked, the conversations she had overheard, all the acts of violence that they had committed in order to get their way. She told him about how they had taken people, too. Hugo's face was slack with shock. He handed over the slices of bread and jam in silence. It was a rare occasion that the young Frenchman was lost for words. The only thing he could utter was, "shit."  
Inside the captain's quarters, that evening, things were no less tense. Hook muttered and grumbled to himself as he poured over his logbooks and notes, writing down all that had been decided amongst his officers.  
"I don't want you to fight." He confided in Faith, sitting at his desk, "but it may be a necessity." He frowned, there were unsaid words left behind, threatening to spill from his mouth. The truth was, that he didn't think that Faith could fight. She was weak and slow. In battle, he thought, her only role would likely be a liability. The words remained seared into Hook's mind, but he dare not say them. Not to Faith, not to anyone. Faith, he knew, already thought herself to be useless to him. And his officers, they thought so too. If the officers heard Hook say that she might be a liability in battle, then they would use it as an excuse to send her away. If Faith were to hear him say those words, it would be a thousand times worse, she would insist upon leaving him and there would be no changing her mind.  
"You think there will be a fight, then?" She asked.  
"If the governor is involved? It could be a war." Hook groaned and reached through his shirt to unbuckle the strap laying across his chest, but stopped when his cabin door flew open. Hugo and Alex both appeared to be incredibly frustrated.  
"What do you mean by this?" Hugo demanded, gesturing towards Alex. "I've already got my hands full keeping all you bastards fed!" Hook had decided that Hugo should be the person to keep Alex in line. It felt like the obvious thing to do. Hugo was friendly, had many years of experience working on the ship, and most importantly, he didn't hold tight to the superstitions about women at sea.  
"Look out for her." Hook said, "find her some clean clothes."  
"And then what? Make her a bed and tuck her in?"  
"Teach her, she can be your apprentice until we find her a more suitable crew."  
"Don't I get a say in what happens to me?" Alex asked, "what if I don't want to cook?" Hugo looked at his captain, then to Alex, laughing at her audacity.  
"Learning to obey one's captain is the first lesson in being part of a crew." Hook said, "you'll do as I say, and if at some point you prove yourself to have other talents- I may reconsider your standing." Hook looked at Alex, then turned his gaze to Hugo, "stop laughing." He ordered, "it wasn't that funny."   
"Yes, captain." Hugo said, pulling himself together.  
"Now, you two must learn how to work together and cooperate." Hook said in the sort of tone a teacher might use when speaking to very young children. He looked at them sternly, daring them to argue. They remained quiet. "Get out of my sight." He finished. Hugo grabbed Alex by the shoulder and directed her away from the captain's quarters and back down to the galley. The door slammed shut and finally Hook could free himself of the leather strap across his chest. It hung loose beneath his shirt, the skin that it had covered was particularly raw. He stretched his arms outwards, wincing as he did. Hook hoped that the coming days would be easier, he needed the calm before the storm, needed the rest and respite it could provide. He felt uneasy, the governor had tried to stand against him before. Charging tariffs when he came to trade at the central island and town, stopping him from coming close to the port, locking his crew up for days on end. Never before had the governor ventured to other islands with such intentions. And then there were the issues with the southern tribe. Alex had told him about the women that the chief had bought. From one of his own fleet, it seemed. He had been betrayed in a way so unforgivable that it made him question his standing with every man who sailed under him. There was one rule that every crew agreed to before Hook would accept them as his own. People are not cargo. There was no negotiating that. Breaking that rule, crossing that line, meant certain death to all those who participated. Just thinking about it made him feel sick. Hook's chest tightened around the quickening palpitations of his heart. Women had been tortured, their lives taken away, because he had trusted the wrong people. Hook rose from his desk, heart still beating in its uncomfortable way, unrelenting like the flapping wings of a hummingbird. He staggered towards his bed, heart so fast that everything else felt slowed down, the beating loud in his ears.  
"Captain?" Faith's voice barely broke through the rapid crashing of drums coming from within him, "are you okay?" She rushed to his side, placing the back of her hand against his forehead. There was no response. Hook just looked at her, feeling worse now than he had before. Just like he had trusted the wrong people, Faith trusted him- she even cared about him. Knowing that only made Hook's chest feel tighter. He didn't deserve her affections, he was certain of it. In the deepest recesses of his mind, Hook knew himself to be just as bad, just as cruel as any other pirate could be. But as much as he was sure that Faith would be better off if she were far away from him, he couldn't bear the thought of being separated from her.   
Hook bent forward, taking deep breaths, trying to calm himself. Faith stayed right next to him, hand at his back, gently moving up and down his spine. Gradually the tightness in his chest dissipated, and he could focus on what needed to be done once more. He stood to return to his desk, but Faith pulled him by the arm back down to the bed.  
"No more work tonight." She said, Hook didn't argue. He let her fuss over him and care for him without resistance. Faith removed his shirt, then pulled the leather harness of his hook down from his shoulders and off of his arm. There was a waxy balm that the captain kept in the small cupboard by his bed that was supposed to ease the welts and rashes caused by the hook, but he had seldom used it, it was difficult to apply it by himself. Faith warmed the balm between her fingertips and spread it over his reddened skin. Her hands moved fluidly across his shoulder and back, over his chest and down his right arm. Each raw, red mark treated with tenderness.   
It was always the way, with Hook, that his lowest of moments were fueled by the same two feelings. Fear and insecurity. Those two emotions were so closely linked within the captain's heart that he could hardly fathom one existing without the other. His fears so often seemed to grow from the notion that he was just not enough. Not strong enough, not brave enough, not intelligent enough. It was a place that he returned to time and time again. Yet, within this darkness, Hook had found a kind of comfort. These feelings were familiar to him, a home that he could always find. The place that he went to when there was nowhere else to go. In a way, he felt the darkness freed him. If he was aware of his wretchedness, then it could not be used against him. If he knew the monster was all that he was, then he did not have to chain it. If he knew he was unlovable, he did not have to chase it. Darkness freed Hook, but it also blinded him. In his darkness he could not see the truth in front of him. Even the pitchest of obsidian darkness could be lit up by a single spark.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1qGt_xR5W-Y

Hook had estimated that the journey would take seven more days, give or take. Weather was fair, and the winds were average. He had supposed that they may face another storm, but none had shown up so far. Tensions built throughout the ship, rising steadily ever since the crew had found out about what had happened to the tradesmen on the small island. Danger was coming at Hook from all directions. From the governor, the tribe, a traitorous crew beyond the borderlines, and from the rebellion being plotted below deck. Full of nervous energy, Faith had taken herself to organising Hook's wardrobe. Shirts with shirts, breeches with breeches, coats with coats. Formal wear separate from his work clothes. It was as she moved the last of his coats that she came across something unexpected. The khaki jacket she had been wearing when she first found herself in Neverland. She took it out and held it to her chest, the old scent of her room engulfed her in a comforting cloud. A weight knocked against her knee, Faith smiled, realising what it must be. She hoped that it still worked. Reaching into one of the deep pockets, Faith found her Polaroid camera, and boxes of spare film. She examined it closely.  
"Oh my god!" She exclaimed.  
"What is it, dearest?" Hook asked, peering over a book from his place on the sofa. Faith bounded across the room and sat beside him, pointing the camera's lens in their direction.  
"Smile!" She said. Although confused, Hook obliged her request and with the press of a button, the machine burst into life. There was a small flash of light and a quiet whirring sound, then like magic a small square of paper came from the machine. Faith handed it to Hook. "Shake it for like thirty seconds." She said, excitedly. Hook did as he was asked, wondering when she might explain herself.  
"Witchcraft!" He hissed, seeing their image appear on the paper.  
"Science." Faith corrected him, "it's called a photograph! Let's take another, but like, turn around a bit so there's more light on us." She turned to face the window and Hook did the same. Another click, another photo, and then another. This time, right before pressing the button, Faith had turned to kiss Hook on his cheek, just like she had seen young couples do on MySpace and Facebook. The picture revealed a seldom seen flush across Hook's cheeks, and an almost vulnerable look in his eyes. It was the very nature of a kiss upon the cheek that had made him feel that way. There's an innocence to those kinds of kisses not easily replicated by others, somet delicate, a sweetness and kindness that he was sure he could not be worthy of. He was a pirate, after all, he had stolen, he had maimed, he had killed. There was little delicate, sweet, or kind about him. The picture revealed a seldom seen flush across Hook's cheeks, and an almost vulnerable look in his eyes.  
"May I keep this?" He asked, holding the developing picture delicately between his thumb and forefinger. Faith nodded with a smile.  
"It's a miracle this thing still works." She sounded so excited, so unlike how she had been over the previous days, "I was sure that if the water hadn't damaged it, then the battery would definitely be dead. But it's not!" She sighed wistfully "Wish I had more film though." Ever since her grandmother had given her the camera, Faith had kept it on her wherever she went. It was a comfort item. Bubbe Moskowitz had bought a pair of the cameras when Faith had been forced to move down south with her mother, stepfather, and stepsister. She hadn't wanted to go, she had tried to stay with her Bubbe. Si had put his foot down, though, in his mind the move was all because of Faith so her not coming with the family was simply not an option.  
"Take as many pictures as you can, and I'll do the same." Bubbe Moskowitz had told her granddaughter, "then, when you come to visit we can share our adventures. It will be like we were never apart." Faith took pictures of her favourite passages in books she was reading, her cat, the view from the window in the library, the sea, the hospital, public transport. Anything she could think of. Her Bubbe took pictures of her dog, her friends at the pensioner's group she went to, the blankets she knitted, the plants in her ground floor flat, and the parks she went to. Whenever Faith had the chance to visit her grandmother, they would look through the photos over lunch and stick them into a scrapbook.   
That afternoon, thinking fondly of her Bubbe, Faith took picture after picture. Of Hook, of herself, of them together, the captain's quarters, the ship, the ocean with the distant islands, Alex and Hugo, even Mr. Smee. The whole time, she imagined what her Bubbe would say if she saw them. For a few hours it was like all tension had been lifted, there was no fight coming, no darkness or cruelty. Things felt normal, perhaps more normal than twenty-first century life, even. Faith collapsed down on the couch and beckoned for Hook to join her, she reached into her pocket to show him all of her photos.   
"I think this is my favourite." She said, pulling out a picture of the captain at the helm- his hair blown to the side by the wind and shirt open down his chest, "looks like you could be on the cover of one of those naughty books middle-aged women like to read…"  
"Oh?" Hook said, not understanding the book reference she had just made, "I think I like this one best." He took one of the pictures from the stack with a smile, neither he nor Faith had realised it had been taken at the time. Faith had handed the camera off to Hugo briefly whilst she fussed over Hook's shirt. Without the usual buttons and ties, it was easy for his shirts to get twisted around the neck slash and collar. Usually he would just let it stay as it was, but Faith never did, she always came to fix it for him. Hook had sat patiently on a barrel whilst she adjusted the neckline, tugging it back into the correct position. It was in the moments afterwards that Hugo had managed to accidentally press the shutter button, taking the picture. Two people looking at each other, fingers intertwined, Faith's left hand laying comfortably over Hook's encased right arm.  
"I look so fat." She sighed, shaking her head.  
"And?" Hook questioned, brows furrowing.  
"Well it's just not nice, is it?"  
"Not nice? I think you look beautiful." Hook said, firmly.  
"You're crazy."  
"If thinking that you are a beautiful woman makes me crazy, then I shall wear that label with pride." He told her, handing the picture back. Faith looked at it, trying to see what he had, but she just couldn't. She placed it back at the bottom of the pile and pulled out another. It showed the moment that Hook had been the one to surprise her with a kiss on the cheek. Faith shook her head and passed the picture on for Hook to see.  
"Who could have thought a huge pirate could be so adorable?" She said with a smile. Hook liked seeing Faith smile. She didn't smile often, and when she did her smiles were small. Hook liked them all the same. He had paid attention to her expressions and had learned her smiles and what each one of them meant. The one she tried to suppress when he would compliment her- the left corner of her mouth rising that bit higher than the right. The way her face rounded before a laugh. Wide eyed when reading a thrilling tale. The one where her lips appeared fuller and somewhat pouting when he would tease her and she was about to give a red hot response. A smirk when she was gossipping with Hugo. But his favourite was her quietest smile, the one that lived mostly in her eyes, the one that was just for him, the one that was engraved with the deepest and purest feelings she had for him. That was the smile he saw in the photograph. It was the smile on her face as she showed him the photographs she had taken of them together. Hook examined the picture carefully, mesmerised by its reproduction of their image. He had never seen an image so real in his life, if he looked hard enough he could relive those few moments in perfect detail.   
Human emotions being as peculiar and volatile as they are, had caused the afternoons levity. Just like Faith, Hook had been restless and stressed. He had been flipping through books, trying to focus on something other than what they might meet when confronting the chief of the southern tribe. Then Faith had found her camera. The mood had lightened with every click of the shutter and small flash of light. She had giggled and smiled, and had brought out a side of her captain that seldom few people ever saw. There were times, although seemingly rare, that Captain Hook could be playful. Whilst he could Joke around with his crew over a game of cards or dice and a bottle of rum, it wasn't the same as being playful with a woman he was courting. The photograph he held showed an instance of his playfulness. A spontaneous kiss upon the cheek of the woman he had chosen. If only that picture could have captured more than a moment. Then Hook would be able to hear that joyful giggle that had come shortly afterwards when he had lightly bumped his nose against hers. Faith, still giggling, had done the same back to him, and it had become a swift back and forth that only ended when her giggles had turned into bold, uncontrollable laughter.  
As quickly as light had spread through the day, darkness came once more. The ship was still a way from the southern tribe's island, but close enough to see the tiny dots of distant torches lit at night. Unaccustomed to sea living as she was, Alex found it difficult to sleep in a hammock below deck. She had complained to Faith about it, who had then called upon her captain to help find a solution. Hook hadn't been keen on doing anything, at first, he thought it was necessary for her to get used to living as any other crew member would. But Faith owned the keys to his heart and soul, and with a few kind words had changed his mind. Alex had then been given bed space in Hugo's small quarters, but she hadn't wanted that, either. All she had wanted was to have a bed roll on the forecastle. Hook had okayed it with a wave of his hand, stranger things, by far, had been requested by his crew after all. Every night, when her duties were complete, Alex placed her bed roll and blankets under some wooden planks that she had balanced on top of crates for a shelter. It was her position in the nighttime hours that had warned Hook of the danger his crew might find himself in.  
Alex knocked frantically at the captain's quarters.  
"What is it?" Hook called out  
"Trouble, I think." Alex said. She could hear tumbling around on the other side of the door. Hook opened it, shirt not tucked in, right sleeve concealing the incomplete arm.  
"Get in." He stood aside so that she could slip by more easily and closed the door behind her. Faith was still sitting in bed, pulling the drawstring of her shift tight around the neckline. "Tell me exactly what you mean by 'trouble.'" Hook continued.  
"It's hard to explain." Alex said, "the tribe, my people. We… they have different ways of sending messages to others. We're not just one island."  
"Seven, I believe?" Hook interjected. Alex nodded.  
"Well, one of the ways we send messages is through lights. Torches where others can see, different heights and patterns. Usually they're used to warn of incoming storms."  
"There's no storm headed our way." Hook frowned.  
"I know." Alex clenched her fist, "the torches lit aren't for a storm. They are a call to fight."  
"To fight?"  
"Yes. But it's strange. The torches are only part lit." She explained.  
"What does that mean?" Hook asked. Alex shrugged.  
"I've never seen the torches like that before." She hadn’t even seen the call to fight before. Not like this. Her parents had shown her diagrams drawn in the sand, carefully explaining the patterns and what each torch represented. The tallest and brightest for the chief, calling for all of his people to come together in unity. To the right, a smaller torch, set by the chief’s son, the man who would lead their people to battle. Behind those torches stood three small lights shaped like a ‘v’, representing what they would fight for. Their families, their ancestors, their home. But on that night, two of the lights were missing. The light for home and the light of the son had not been lit, in their place was a frightening pitch darkness. Alex hadn’t recognised the pattern at first, It was only when she had extended her hand out towards the horizon to measure the distance between each light that she saw the similarity to what was visible and what her parents had once drawn for her.  
"If this is a call to fight," Hook started, "would there be responses from the other islands?"  
"Yes." Alex nodded.  
"Go wake the men below deck, we’re changing course.” Hook ordered, ushering Alex out of his quarters.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W9wXnVxfLGU

"What do you think it all means?" Faith asked, nervously pulling at the sleeves of her shift, Hook sighed and shook his head.  
"I can only guess. If the lights are, indeed, a call to fight- and there are, in fact, lights missing…" he paused, "It could mean that a great tragedy has struck the tribe and lives have been lost."  
"Do you think the governor…"  
"Hurt them? His thugs weren’t frightened to use force with Vic and the other men on Blackfort. It does seem the most likely thing to have happened, and would explain why the chief is calling for war." Hook threw off his shirt and picked up his infamous prosthesis, "can you help me?" He asked, finding his joints particularly stuff. Faith nodded, she would have preferred that he didn't wear the thing at all when his pain was so bad, but that was rarely an option. She was abundantly aware of Hook's insecurities when it came to his right arm. He hated people seeing it, and only forwent wearing his hook when his aches and pains were at their absolute worse. Standing before him, Faith's fingers reached up to Hook's chest and ran across the lines of scars where the leather had so often cut into him. There was a redness around them, threatening to tear open once again. She sighed.  
"Will you at least let me put some of that balm on first?" She asked, "it looks so-"  
"Hideous. I am quite aware." Hook muttered, scowling.  
"I was going to say painful." She corrected him. Hook's scowl became an annoyed pout. He was more annoyed at himself than anything else, annoyed that he still felt like Faith must find him so unattractive, annoyed that he had assumed the worst of her intentions, annoyed that he had become so annoyed. He sat himself down, quietly, allowing Faith to rub the balm into his skin. It wouldn't protect him from any more damage, but would at least soothe the soreness already there.  
Faith carefully slid the hook into place over the captain's right arm, and secured each of the leather straps. Hook stretched and flexed his muscles, making sure that everything was fastened according to his preferences.   
"Too loose." He grumbled. Faith tightened the straps in silence. She didn't want him to be in any more pain than he already was, but there was no point arguing. Hook's hook was something that never failed to bring out his awful stubborn streak. He stuck to his ways, even when they were demonstrably bad for him. Faith, sadly, kissed him across the bridge of his nose. That kiss said the words that she couldn't speak.  
"I worry about you."  
Hook responded by pressing his forehead against hers, his meaning being:  
"You shouldn't. I'm not worthy."  
He stood up and put his shirt back on before leaving his quarters to view the lights calling for war for himself.  
The torches had been lit exactly as Alex had described, the same incomplete pattern stood across the shoreline, repeated every mile. Tiny lights in the distance like stars fallen from the sky to the sea below. Hook took control of the helm, he was familiar enough with the surroundings to guide his ship through the waters between islands whilst maintaining enough distance to not arouse suspicion.   
The darkness was suffocating. There should have been torches lit across the islands, a response to the chief's call. But island after island lay in silence.  
"Look!" Alex called out, "lights!" She pointed to the port side of the ship where small dots of light had appeared. The torches were being lit as they watched. Alex squinted into the distance, trying to discern if what she was seeing was what she thought it could be. "No." She said, "it can't be." She ran to the helm to tell Hook to lay anchor. "We have to stop there." She informed him. He didn't question her. His own knowledge of the tribe's methods of communication was far too limited to ignore what she had to say.  
The ship approached the island slowly, and in darkness. Hook had ordered all lanterns to be extinguished. If danger laid ahead, then delaying the moment that they were detected in the water could only benefit them. Every action the crew took was with quiet in mind. There would be no unnecessary risk taking that night. As preparations were being made to lay anchor and dispatch longboats, Hook stole away back into his quarters.  
"We're visiting one of the tribal islands. I hope to return by sunrise." He told Faith, she looked at him incredulously. From his desk, Hook pulled out a map. "We are here." He said, drawing a circle in black ink around an island. If I don't return, you need to find a way here." He drew an X across a landmass towards the southeast, "There you will find a border that will take you back home."  
"Home?" Faith repeated his last word, "no! I'm going over to the island with you!" She insisted.  
"It's too dangerous."  
"I don't care."  
"There could be things there that you shouldn't witness."  
"I don't care." She repeated herself forcefully, "after all the chief had planned for me, I want answers!"  
"And if his warriors throw a spear straight through your heart before you get your answers, what then?" Hook snapped.  
"I don't know. I guess I'll die." Faith responded, "it doesn't change anything, I still want my answers." Hook groaned, she could be just as stubborn as he was. Short of tying her up below deck, there was nothing he could do, he was certain that Faith would find a way over to the island with him. He went back into his desk drawer and retrieved a small blade.  
"In case something happens." Hook pressed the hilt into her hand, "I'll leave you to get dressed.  
Cold winds whipped across Faith's cheeks as she sat huddled next to Hook in a longboat. The closer they got to the island, the faster her heart beat. Earlier she had felt so confident, she had imagined standing before the chief and demanding justice for his crimes. But now that he may be within reach, she felt like she wouldn't even be able to look at the man. Hook could feel her nervous fidgeting beside him, he wished he could tell her that everything would be okay, but he couldn't. He didn't want to lie to her. Even upon the land, where they found no aggression, could he bring himself to whisper words of reassurance in her ear.   
"Captain!" A big, familiar voice called out across the sand, Hook grabbed hold of his sword, and approached the person walking towards him and his crew.  
"I wasn't expecting to see you out here, Malohi." Hook looked the man up and down, scanning him for weapons.  
"Nor I, you. But I think we have much to discuss." He looked at the group of people Hook had stepped away from, "you should bring her, too." He nodded in Faith's direction.  
Malohi led them to a nearby cabin, it was far smaller than the one that Faith remembered him having in the main village. Inside, they sat around a low table, Malohi poured three cups of a fruit wine, a symbol of respect.  
"Much has changed since you left us, night owl." He said to Faith, Hook's eyes narrowed, he didn't appreciate that use of a pet name for her, "a lot of that change was down to you."  
"I didn't mean for things to go how they did." She looked down at her cup and took a small sip of the sweet liquid inside. "I'm sorry."  
"You're not the one who should be apologising here." Hook growled.  
"I agree." Malohi crossed his arms, "my father and his council, what they did, what they planned to do, it all came out. It's why things are different now." He uncrossed his arms to take a drink and began recanting all that had come to pass in Faith's absence.  
Tahi had woken the entire tribe to warn of the fires in the farmlands. Then she had gone to her brother and father, hysterical that Faith was trying to leave, crying about a wedding that Malohi knew nothing about. She had spun some sort of story about Faith being a spy for Hook to weaken the tribe, insisted that she had fled to join her captain once more. Malohi didn't believe it, at first, and neither did his father. But now as the pair sat before him, he wasn't quite so sure of the fact. After all, his father had given a good reason as to why Faith couldn't possibly be working with Hook for any reason. He shook his head, trying to push his suspicions aside to continue the story. He told them about the arrival of the Governor's men, and the offer they had made.   
"They brought women with them." He said, "made a big show about how they had all given birth in Neverland, said that if we ended all trade with pirates, we could have them all to do with as we pleased." He drank some more, "I was against it all. We don't buy people, or so I thought. That's when I learned that my father and his council had been doing it for a long time." Malohi had been heartbroken, he had trusted his father above all others, had always believed the chief to be a just man. He had never imagined the man who raised him could have done such a thing. Soon, everyone in the tribe knew about it. The tribe had fractured almost irreparably. "My father and his council accepted the deal, but they had opposition. That's why I'm here. He drove everyone who was against it away from the village."  
"And that's why the call for war has been lit." Hook mused, "I'm surprised that the chief would make such a declaration against his own people, his own son even."  
"Everyone is capable of doing terrible things if they're desperate enough. You should know that, Captain."   
"Don't you dare-" Hook started, slamming his fist against the table, his eyes flashed red and Faith flinched away from him. Malohi's eyes darted between them, putting something together in his mind.  
"Wait." He said, "she doesn't know, does she? You didn't tell her?" He bellowed, becoming almost as frightening as Hook could be.  
"It's none of your goddamn business." Hook shouted back.  
"But it is hers!"  
"What is?" Faith yelled.  
"Haven't you worked it out?" Malohi asked, "he sold you to my father." She didn't believe it, it was ridiculous. Her captain would never do something like that. She turned to Hook, looking for some reassurance, but he had none to give.   
"Is it true?" She demanded of him, but he couldn't answer. He just stuttered and looked away. Faith ran from the cabin to a spot on the sand near a set of torches. Her heart raced and it was hard to breathe. She didn't want to believe it, but Hook hadn't denied it. When he caught up with her, Faith couldn't even look him in the eye, "you sold me!" She shouted at him, loud enough for all to hear, "you sold me."  
"It wasn't like that." He pleaded with her.  
"Well what was it like, then? Because I'm having a hard time understanding."  
"It was… it was a mistake."  
"A mistake?" The words came out of Faith's mouth oddly shaky and high pitched, "how do you sell someone by mistake?"  
"That was the wrong word." Hook groaned and clenched his fist, "I regretted it almost as soon as it happened." Faith paced back and forth in front of him, shaking with anger.  
"So you regretted it? You didn't do anything about it, though, did you? You didn't try to change things!"  
"How could I?" Hook retorted bitterly, "you wanted to stay there, you wanted to leave me. When you told me that's what you wanted, I couldn't think of anything worse than being without you."  
"Then why didn't you tell me that?" Faith took a step forward, "if you had asked me to stay with you, I would have. If you wanted me to stay with you, you just had to ask." Her voice cracked, "why didn't you ask?"  
"It was for the same bloody reason I gave you up in the first place." Hook's voice raised.  
"And what was that?" Faith demanded.  
"I was afraid."  
"Afraid? Of what?"  
"Of you." He admitted.  
"Of me?"  
"Of what you were doing to me." He stumbled backwards, "God, you can be so fucking… couldn't you tell that even then I was falling for you?" He took a deep breath, "can't you see that I'm in love with you?" His shout echoed throughout the island, "I'm in love with you." Hook repeated, falling to his knees.  
"How can I trust a thing you say when you've been lying to me all along?" Faith asked him, holding back tears.  
"I'm not lying, I swear it, what can I do to prove myself?" He begged, still on his knees.  
"I don't know."  
"I'll do anything." He insisted.  
"You can start by going to the chief and freeing every woman he has bought," Faith closed her eyes, trying to force her tears back, "and then… then when they are all safe, you can take me to the border." Hook shrunk into himself, his chest tightened painfully, there were no words left to say. He had brought this all upon himself. As Faith walked past him, he reached out to hold her hand, he grabbed it for all of a second before she slipped through his fingertips. He was losing her again, and he deserved it.  
The world moved around him, the tide drew closer, the sounds of men grew louder. Hook did not move from his place in the sand. He didn't want to move. There was much to be done, but he didn't care. Faith was at the other end of the beach, sitting against a longboat that had been flipped onto its side, bottle of wine in hand. Alex sat quietly next to her.  
"It's okay." She comforted her friend, "you're beautiful, you'll find someone else."  
"I don't want someone else." Faith mumbled, "and I'm not beautiful, not where I'm from." She drank deeply from the bottle, drowning her sorrows. There were no words that Alex, or anyone else, could have said to her to ease her soul. As hurt and betrayed as she felt, there was still a part of Faith hidden deep within her heart that wanted her to run across the sand to Hook and hold him tight. A tiny voice urging her to go to him that would not be quiet. Even as the alcohol took ahold of her mind and body, the voice remained clear as ever. Alex stayed with her all night. Just as Faith had been avoiding her feelings for Hook, Alex had been avoiding a problem of her own. As far as the tribe knew, she was supposed to be dead, a large brimmed hat kept her face in shadows and her loose clothes hid her body, but Alex was sure that when daylight hit people would see and recognise her. Then she would have to explain. Hook had betrayed Faith, but Alex had betrayed all of her people. Her family, her friends, her hunting party, she had left them all behind without a single word. She had spent so long thinking of what she would eventually say to them all, but with so much changed she was afraid that they might not listen to her. She didn't even know if the people she cared for were here. For all she knew, they could have all decided to side with the chief.


End file.
